Cat missing - and it's bonfire night tomorrow

lexilex

She was a real little character! She had such a huge personality, and she knew just what to do to have us all running round after her.

I've been meaning to say actually, we didn't reguarly dress her up in clothes as in that photo, it was a one off She had a halloween costume actually, never got a chance to see her in it though

I hope the white cat I saw was her, I just wish I'd of told my bf so he could have looked too. I've read a few similar stories now. I'd love to feel her on my bed or something, I really would. Just to know she was okay.

I'm having a good day today I think. Songs keeps setting me off, "Don't Wanna Miss A Thing" came on the radio whilst I was driving home and I was on the verge of becoming hysterical. My boyfriends cat crying at me tonight brought a few tears to my eyes too. It's still less than two weeks since she went though. Two weeks ago tonight we were having the most perfect weekend. She was sat next to us trying to pinch our steak. Miss her so much.

Oh and I agree that my boyfriend has been brilliant. He's still not gone home, and still looking after me. He's been the only one who's understood how awful this has been. Tbh she was his cat really too. He got her for me, and for half of each week he'd be here, babying her and looking after her. I can't thank him enough really, he has been amazing.

He's been reading this thread, hope he doesn't read this post, don't want his head to get too big.

mazza1970

Just read your thread and just had to say how sorry I am. I know what you are going through in losing a beloved pet as my sister had to have her gorgeous cross lab put to sleep 10 weeks ago yesterday and it is still raw.

I had loads of photos of him on my mobile - he would only sit still for me for a photo, never my sister, so I downloaded them onto the computer and emailed them to her.

They said they would never get another dog, but they had a Jack Russel who grew up with him and she was fretting for him, so they decided to get another Jack Russell for company, and it is like having Ben back again, she has got the same temperament as him and she only plays with the toys that Ben used to play with!

lexilex

Mazza, sorry to hear about your sisters dog

I got a reply from the government petitions site today about the petition I submitted regarding councils trying to return dead animals to their owners. It was rejected because they believe it's intended to be humourous? I'm so angry, let them know that too.

I think I've started to accept she's not coming back now. Still having the odd cry, like last night when I was in bed on my own for the first time without her. I'm starting to be able to smile at the daft stuff she did now though which is good I guess. Saw the cat she was chasing when she got run over for the first time this morning, give him a piece of my mind too, not sure he understood though

I just want to say thank you to everyone who has posted in this topic. It has helped me so much over these last couple of weeks to be able to come on here and talk to you all about how I am feeling. You've all been lovely and I really appreciate it.

chaliepud

Just read the whole of your thread, I was so sorry to hear about Lexi, she looked gorgeous. Our kitten, Archie was killed on the road behind our house just over a month ago, he wasn't yet 8 months. We were all devastated, especially my 7 yr old daughter, they were so close, he slept on her bed most nights. What made it worse was that we never found him, but all the evidence told us that it was him, the foxes apparently get a lot of the road kill in our village and unfortunately they don't carry scanners!

We are currently agonising over whether to get our daughter another kitten. The road we are on isn't too bad as it has speed humps and the road at the back of us isn't very busy but it isn't well lit and there are no speed bumps so cars tend to go faster. He wasn't usually out when it got dark but it was a mild evening and the kids were in and out playing on the trampoline. I wish I'd shut him in now but hindsight is a wonderful thing..... Luckily we have our 3 dogs which is a real comfort. I just wish we had a crystal ball to know if another cat would survive the roads!

MoneySavingStudent_2

Hey Lexilex,
Im sorry about your poor little cat. It reminds me of when i was young.. proberbly about 6yrs old. Our cat, Kitty (Kitty Cat obviously haha) got run over outside our house My mum walked into my room that night n tears and told me, and ill neva forget these words 'Kittys had an accident and shes died' I was completely shocked.. i remember not believin it and then hearin my mum tell me sister (8yrs) and then hearing her crying. We went downstairs and she was wrapped in a blanket n mum told us to say goodbye because she had to go to heaven. As soon as we'd had a cuddle with mum and said byebye we went bck to bed but as soon as i got to the top of the stairs i was sick on the floor it was down to the shock. It was about this time 13 yrs ago but i still think about her.
Alittle bit after i missed her so much because she use to sleep at the bottom of my bed on my feet on a blanket that i laid out for her every night before i went to sleep then when id wake up in the night she'd always be on it and i knew something was wrong when my mum woke me up and she wasnt there. After that i use to put a pillow on my feet when i went to bed and then id dream that she was still there. Then i went to a christmas fair a month later and brought a rattle soft toy cat with quite long hair and sat it on my feet every night and id pretend she was still there and if i woke up scared in the night after a bad dream, id stroke the soft toy cat and think it was her. Sounds abit silly but it made me feel beta for a while until i eventually stopped putting the soft toy on my feet.

Much luv 2 u at this time xx

lexilex

Thanks both of you for your replies.

Chaliepud, so sorry to hear about Archie. Not even 8 months old. That's awful. I think it's made it worse for me that Lexi was so young, there are so many things she didn't get to see. With the other two we had that got run over, it was a bit easier, they were about 3/4yrs and 6/7 yrs. At least they got a bit more of a life. I wasn't as close to them either, they were family cats, were as Lexi was just mine, I did everything for her. Not saying I wasn't completely gutted when they were killed, I was, broke my heart both times, but with Lexi it's been completely different. It's nearly 3 weeks on and I'm still crying.

Friday night I was really upset. I think it was a few things during the day that got to me. Been here on my own was awful, so quiet. Her litter tray is still in the garage. Then I was talking to my mum about her, saying things I would have said if she was here, just talking about her. It's just so easy to foget sometimes.

Had a wobbly moment last night too. Went out for a meal with my boyfriend's dad's side. Was all sat down waiting for our food and his Nanna asked if I still had my cat, infront of everyone. I managed to stop myself crying, but it was horrible having to say no.

Today with all the snow I've been thinking about her a lot. I remember in March when it snowed, the first time she had seen it, and when she went outside she was looking for gaps in the snow to walk on. She didn't like it at all. Then I keep thinking about how cold she must be buried in the garden

chaliepud

I know what you mean, I still have the odd cry now and then. I think I will take his food etc to the cats protection before it goes off, we have a collection point at our vets. We are still considering whether to get another one or not but are currently waiting to see if we are relocating with work so will put off any decisions until then.

Hope you are feeling better soon x

lexilex

I'm feeling really lonely tonight so thought i'd come and post. I'm on my own for the first time in a long long time tonight. Boyfs got an interview at Tesco at 11pm for night shift, which is great, he needs the money after been made redundant in the summer. But this is the first night I've spent alone for god knows how long. I always had Lexi to cuddle so I'm feeling a bit upset.

I'm still missing her loads, still thinking about her constantly and still crying. Is this normal? I'm starting to think not. I talk to her in my head too, and sleep with her teddy everynight. Even I sometimes find myself thinking 'get over it for god sake'. There are so many other people going through so much worse things and here's me crying all the time about my cat. But she was my baby, and I hate life without her.

I decided when she died I wouldn't get another cat unless one came to me. With all three of the cats i've had, we never went out looking for them. The first was the kitten of nextdoors car, the second we got from the RSPCA when we just went for a look round one day, and I got Lexi fom my boyfriends mate when his cat had kittens. Now, my sisters boyfriends cats pregnant, not sure if this is the 'sign' I was waiting for. Don't think I'm ready for another cat though yet, I know I'd just try turning it into Lexi and I would just feel so guilty, like I was trying to replace her, which is just impossible.

Gonna get going, got to get to bed, hopefully will fall straight to sleep, it's bloody horrible without her keeping my feet warm.

Sagz_2

My first cat died over 20 years ago and I still get upset when I think of him, so you are not alone. I've had many pets since then and all are special in their own ways, none was got as a replacement for another but more as a tribute.

You've lots of love and care to give a pet - it would be a shame to let that go to waste when there are lots of cats in rescue..... but you will know when the time is right.

Take care lexilex
xxx

lexilex

I'll get another cat I think in time, but like you say I think I'll know when I'm ready. There was a year and a half between my last cat and Lexi so it may take a while though until I feel like I can have another cat.

Just got an email to say my petition has been approved!

Here's the link if you haven't already seen it.

http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/Lexixxx/

I have to get at least 200 signatures before the government will even look at it so please spread the word!