The miscarriage support and TTC after miscarriage thread

GracieP

It's just 3 weeks and 3 days since I started miscarrying. The night before that I stopped feeling pg and took a test which showed I was not pg anymore. My doctor, who was horrible, said I didn't need to have a scan as I was only at 5 weeks.

galvanizersbaby

Sorry that your doctor wasn't very supportive Gracie P, some of the medical profession are very matter of fact about miscarriages (including my brother-in-law who is a gynacologist :mad: )
I would think that as you've stopped bleeding everything should be getting back to normal but your hormones are bound to be all over the place x

GracieP

galvanizersbaby wrote: »

Sorry that your doctor wasn't very supportive Gracie P, some of the medical profession are very matter of fact about miscarriages (including my brother-in-law who is a gynacologist :mad: )
I would think that as you've stopped bleeding everything should be getting back to normal but your hormones are bound to be all over the place x

I stopped bleeding after 6-7 days and then had a brownish discharge for a further 3/4 days. 13 days after my mc began I had heavy EWCM and that stayed on and off for 8 days. My dh and I tried to bd a couple of times in the last week but neither attempt was very successful. The first time we just weren't ready and the second time I had fallen the day before and had to call a halt to things as my ribs hurt.

I suppose theoretically I could be pregnant, but I'd say it's more likely that my hormones are still all over the place. It just seems so unfair, I was finally starting to feel better, but this has got me feeling really low. Last night when I was half asleep I was feeling so pregnant I forgot about what had happened. I hope this feeling doesn't last too long and my period comes soon. I'll feel a lot better when my hormones get back to normal. I'm really not used to this, I don't usually get hormonal when I'm premenstrual, so having so little control over my emotions is very alien to me.

milliebear00001

GracieP wrote: »

It's just 3 weeks and 3 days since I started miscarrying. The night before that I stopped feeling pg and took a test which showed I was not pg anymore. My doctor, who was horrible, said I didn't need to have a scan as I was only at 5 weeks.

Hi Gracie

I'm concerned that you didn't have a scan although it sounds like the mc was complete. I would be tempted to wait and see if your period kicks in, and if it doesn't maybe take a pregnancy test. It sounds like you ovulated this month, so it's possible. Sometimes though, tests can continue to show positive for some time after mc, but as you've already had a negative test, I think you can assume a positive is a positive if you get one.

Good luck. x

skintchick

Well, today is not a great day for me. I went back to the hospital and waited an hour for my blood test. Then they admitted they lost the results of my last one! I have to go back again on Friday as they insist on two results to see that the hormone level is dropping. Today's test result was 307 which I'd say is way too low for it to be ectopic (plus I have no symptoms) but I have to go back yet again.

As we walked in today a preggy lady walked out and I felt sad, then afterwards we went for lunch and there was a lady in the pub with toddler twins AND a newborn. She was with her mum who was playing with the baby while she took photos and I felt sooo sad that me and my mum can;t do that and I cried in the pub

I feel I've failed my OH and not been the wife I should be - I can;t even give him a baby! I even asked him if he still loves me It really is starting to hit me badly now. Not sure how I will cope going back to work next week.

Hugs to everyone who needs them today. xxx

melvis

Skintchick ... If you're not ready to go back to work, then your GP or the Early Pregnancy Centre at your hospital can give you a sicknote. I didn't know this when I had my m/c and I feel I went back to work too early so take as long as you need

Sorry to hear everyones recent and past stories, I know how heartbreaking it all is.

My story goes like this ... I had a m/c on 29th December 2006. I had my first bleed on Boxing Day, called in sick and saw the midwife on 27th Dec who said it was probably caused buy Xmas morning sex :rolleyes:, it got worse so went to see my GP on 28th Dec who rubbed a little microphone over me to listen for a heartbeat. He couldn't hear anything but assured me this was normal as I was only 11 and a half weeks and sometimes you can't hear a heartbeat til 16 weeks. Told me to go to A&E if had any pains over New Year weekend.

On 29th December I went to work for 6 hours then left to take my kitty to the vets. When I got there I got crippling pains and could barely stand up but made it through the appointment. When I got home I calmed myself down for 10 mins and calmly asked my housemate to drive me to A&E. Once there they saw me within about 2 minutes of arriving. I had to take a pregnancy test (I assume incase I was just another crazy off the street claiming to be having a m/c :rolleyes:) and I 'passed' my bean into the cup. All I could say to the nurse is "there's something weird in there" :rotfl: of all the things.

I was then informed I'd had a m/c and was seen to by the doctor etc. Left the hospital after about 3 hours then had to return for a scan the following week. Only they booked me into the normal scan bit where the pregnant ladies go, which was awful. I was in the waiting room for an hour with lots of pregnant ladies. When I saw the nurse and told her she was horrifed, she gave me an internal scan and took me through everything my body was doing to recouperate (sp?) and rushed me up to the Early Pregnancy Ward who were all fantastic. That's when i found out I could've got a sick note for work but I'd already returned.

I'd only been with OH for 3 months by then (we got pregnant on our first encounter ) but he was fantastic. For about 4 nights after my m/c when I'd finally cry myself to sleep he'd just lay awake incase I woke up and needed him then he finally got some sleep himself. On Jan 29th 2007 we moved into our house together and that was good as it kept me busy but I still had the odd emotional breakdowns for months afterwards.

We're in another house now, have been here 3 months and I have a dog and 3 cats to shower with affection. I'm sure we'll have a baby sometime soon, it's just a shame we lost The Bean

(P.S Sorry if any of that was a bit too much information!)

skintchick

THat's good to know. I have been off this week as my boss said not to go in but I don;t feel ready to go back yet. I know I might on Monday, and it might be good for me to go back as well but I want to see how I feel.

I have a history of depression so I need to be really careful or I will end up ill.

melvis

skintchick wrote: »

THat's good to know. I have been off this week as my boss said not to go in but I don;t feel ready to go back yet. I know I might on Monday, and it might be good for me to go back as well but I want to see how I feel.

I have a history of depression so I need to be really careful or I will end up ill.

I'd make an appointment with your GP tomorrow or Friday and tell him your concerns and see what he recommends

nadnad

i was off work for 6 weeks after my miscarriage. it wasnt until then that i felt completely ready. everyones different but make sure you take the time you need.

i think its awful that they dont have a separate area for people who are miscarrying to wait. i also went to the EPU initially and and then twice more to be scanned and checked (eventually was booked in for d&c), and sitting there knowing that my baby was gone and having to look at other happy happy women with there scan photos was agony. i'm sure it wasnt pleasant for them either seeing me crying in my OH's arms, because im sure they knew what was happening. it wouldnt take much for a separate waiting area or room surely?

Tiger_greeneyes

skintchick wrote: »

Well, today is not a great day for me. I went back to the hospital and waited an hour for my blood test. Then they admitted they lost the results of my last one! I have to go back again on Friday as they insist on two results to see that the hormone level is dropping. Today's test result was 307 which I'd say is way too low for it to be ectopic (plus I have no symptoms) but I have to go back yet again.

That's a similar thing to what happened with my ectopic pregnancy - my HCG level went down far too slowly - which suggested that the pregnancy was still there - the miscarriage I had gone through (three days of mental and physical agony although my gp wouldn't confirm what was happening to me, despite 2-3 visits). The hospital eventually confirmed a miscarriage. A few days later I had to go back for a blood test. The next day, the hospital rang me and said I might still be pregnant - but they omitted to tell me that there was no hope or that they suspected an ectopic - I was just elated to find I could still be pregnant after being told I was miscarrying. I went straight in for a scan as they wanted to see me urgently. The scan found the embryo on the fibrillae - the frilly bit at the far end of the fallopian tube - right next to my left ovary. I had emergency cesarian the same afternoon

Earlier in the thread, you mentioned you felt like you were losing it SC - when they brought me around after the surgery, that's exactly how I felt - the nurse asked me how I felt and I replied that I was really, really angry and told her to leave me alone. If I wasn't in hospital, I'd have screamed the place down through sheer grief and frustration.

One thing I hate about hospitals - why do they put women who are losing their baby into the maternity ward? There's nothing more cruel, imho.