HUbby says I am tight with money

belfastgirl23

I have managed to save a little money via doing GCs etc from our joint account. I haven't exactly talked to DH about this but I'm putting the money towards overpaying the mortgage (and adding some of my own as well) and have managed to overpay by almost £3k this year so far. OK it's not exactly upfront but it will be a very nice surprise for him when he finds out

So I'm not being honest exactly but I know what I'm doing is in both our interests, esp with all the current to do in the financial systems....

Cerisa

I totally agree with Jojo about the financial independence thing. Apart from anything else it gives you a sense of equality and I think makes for a better relationship - If you know you can afford to leave, but you choose to stay, that's fantastic. while, if (idiophreak) you started spending the rent money on crack or more mildly, Gucci, your gf would have a fall back, and if there was violence or unpleasantness, she could leave. That goes for you too.

I know a gay couple who have completely co-dependent finances, although only Matt is working. Quite regularly Jack will come back from River Island with a new suit and a guilty demenour. Then they have to eat soup for a week to pay the rent.

If Matt had a separate account, there'd be no problem.

Idiophreak

Cerisa wrote: »

I totally agree with Jojo about the financial independence thing. Apart from anything else it gives you a sense of equality and I think makes for a better relationship - If you know you can afford to leave, but you choose to stay, that's fantastic. while, if (idiophreak) you started spending the rent money on crack or more mildly, Gucci, your gf would have a fall back, and if there was violence or unpleasantness, she could leave. That goes for you too.

I don't think anybody's really disputing the merits of having a little financial independence...It's getting it in secret that's the issue...

[Deleted User]

Hi all,

I'm a fella and I'm the one who looks after all the money. Wife is useless at it and just cant be bothered.

I'm the one who has to tell her to calm down on the spending sometimes. It does annoy me that she doesnt take ANY responsibility whatsoever and just leave it to me. I dont mind doing it but if I say we're skint then shes got to take heed.

BTW - I would also go ballistic if I found out she was SECRETELY taking money from our joint account and putting it in her account.

1399steve

I look after the joint account but OH and I do it the other way round to what some seem to do. The joint account is solely for mortgage, bills, food shopping and saving for annual holiday and other joint expenses.

Our wages go into our seperate accounts and we have discussed and agreed what counts as joint expenditure and what proportion we are each responsible to contribute and this money goes in each month on standing order. Everything else is our own and stays in our own accounts and any additional joint spending is discussed and funded from our own accounts.

So far this seems to be working for us although there are no kids involved yet that may complicate things in the future.........

traveller

1399steve wrote: »

I look after the joint account but OH and I do it the other way round to what some seem to do. The joint account is solely for mortgage, bills, food shopping and saving for annual holiday and other joint expenses.

Our wages go into our seperate accounts and we have discussed and agreed what counts as joint expenditure and what proportion we are each responsible to contribute and this money goes in each month on standing order. Everything else is our own and stays in our own accounts and any additional joint spending is discussed and funded from our own accounts.

So far this seems to be working for us although there are no kids involved yet that may complicate things in the future.........

That's exactly how I think It should be! This is the only way I'd have a joint bank account personally and was the only way I had one too.:T

Callisto

My OH is pretty useless with money and freely admits that if he has money in his pocket, he wants to spend it! Whereas I prefer to save and buy myself a treat occasionally. We have seperate accounts, he just gives me his share of the bills which are all set up on DD from my account - it's not worth the arguments it would cause to have a joint account.

After the bills are paid, whatever we have left in our personal account is our own money. We share the costs of joint purchases and usually take it in turns to buy takeaways etc. We do each have seperate savings accounts, we pay into these from our own money.

For an ultra budget weekend away, go to a Youth Hostel! We are getting a private room for one night next week for the grand sum of £31!