Signing up for a loan on behalf of girlfriend who wants a boob job

lizziebell*80

JayB wrote: »

She has body issues as it is and her boobs dont help bring her mood up.

I watched a TV programme related to boob jobs which followed about 4 women who had had them and were having more, all of which were for cosmetic and not reconstructive reasons. One woman was not happy with herself in any way and had body issues-she already had had a boob job and was about to have another, knowing fine well she wouldn't be happy with the outcome but wanted it anyway as she thought it would be the solution to her problems :eek: I just don't understand?

So my point is that even if she gets the money/finance/loan vis you or otherwise and has the operation, she will find that plastic boobs have not solved her body issues and she may decide that a tummy tuck/liposuction/nose job/2nd boob job would make her feel better (and probaly wouldn't either) and be in the situation again and 7.5k worse off wanting to take on more debt for something unnecessary.

Also one of the other women on the programme had had 5 boob jobs, 3 of which were to fix the other 2 due to her body rejecting the implants (invloved open wounds and a lot of pus, not nice! She now looks ridiculous) so think about the possible complications that may arise for her.

I have quite strong opinions on boob jobs and would never have one due to cost and problems that can occur and also like another posted said they are not permanent and need replacing. I agree that if she is serious about it she should try saving the equivalent to the payments at least and pay for it herself- I am TTC just now and have no other children (just a cat), me and OH work full time and would never consider spending that much on something that wasn't necessary- madness!

Sorry if I appear to have my rant pants on but had to reply......

Get her some silicone chickenfillets and a gel bra (that's what I have )

JayB

Thanks for everyones replies, quite a few different opions here......

She cant get finance as her credit is very poor (a defaulted joint bank account with her ex which hasnt been paid) and a CCJ for something else.

She has mentioned about tummy tucks etc but only jokingly (at the mo). I understand her feelings towards her boobs, they have literally had the life sucked out of them and is reminded of them everytime she gets dressed etc.

The boob job is £5.5K but interest over the 5 years takes it to £7.5K.

Yes I know I have had a child with her but god forbid, if for whatever reason we do split up (hopefully we do not) I will still see my daughter & provide for her but I doubt very much if my bank account would see her installments, leaving me up sh*ts street!!

She stopped breastfeeding after a month and our daughter is on powdered milk.

It was with The Hospital Group and they as a company offer finance if the patient cannot afford to pay one lump sum. She has checked out the surgeon and he, and the company, have very good feedback.

Im not saying giving her a loan is more tying than a baby, of corse its not!! I have stated my reasons above.

Thanks again.

ameliarate

Personally I don't think anybody should have anything that they can't afford (houses aside of course). If you already have debts of £7k I think it is quite unreasonable to ask you to borrow a further £5k for this. Also, why did her mum change her mind about helping out?

Get rid of your existing debts and the CCJ and then see whether it is reasonable to have something which is after all a luxury and not a necessity.

tawecdl

pukkamum wrote: »

I'm sorry but you will have a baby with her but won't lend her money in case you split up??????

Turn the tables before you make ridiculously pointless posts,

would you lend your boyfriend/husband £5.5k to get a penis extension, regardless if you have kids with him or not.

dmg24

I wrote a long reply to this when the site crashed, so I'll just summarise this time!

Does your gf know how much you love her body? A boob job may change the outside, but it won't really change how she feels about herself inside. A few words of love and encouragement are worth a lot more than all the money in the world.

rosie-lee

I just cannot believe that any family has £130 a month spare to pay for boobs!!

There must be literally hundreds of thousands of us out here who would love our bodies & boobies to return to their pre-baby state but IMO its just nature and tough luck. Certainly nothing that a good padded bra (try Ultimo from Debenhams) can't sort out.

I would luuurve new pert boobs but £7.5k can be much more wisely spent in our home. I may not like them, but only my OH see's them without a bra and thankfully he would love me whatever was going on below the neckline, (keeps fingers crossed and hopes!!), as I'm sure you do your girlfriend.

Please, please, please don't take out that loan.

Imagine if the op went wrong, as they occassionally do and you have to borrow a load more money to put them right - your predicament fills me with horror.

Jo_R_2

On a practical note - no I wouldn't get a loan out in your name. I'm only speaking from personal experience, but you will find as someone has mentioned, a LOT of stories on here about people who took out debt in their name for a partner and they subsequently split up and have no recourse and are basically paying off someone else's debt.

I did this with my ex, took out a loan because he had poor credit, and guess the rest... The annoying thing is he's not a nasty or vindictive person, he sees his kids frequently, but financially he has never provided for them and would happily see me destitute as long as he has money for beer.

Emotionally - I can see what she's thinking. I'd just explain that it has NO reflection on how you feel about her but you're worried it could come between you in the future. Maybe emphasise if she still really wants to get it done in, say, six months/a year's time, you will help her to see how she might be able to go about it.

Errata

Mine's a different point of view but worth thinking about. NO invasive surgical procedure is without risk. The very worst case scenario is that your GF could die during the op or as a result of serious complications and leave you with a debt, a baby to bring up and a funeral to pay for.
Make sure you both understand the risks involved.

pinkshoes

JayB wrote: »

She breastfed with her first and did with our little girl for a month and has lost most of her boobs because of this. She has body issues as it is and her boobs dont help bring her mood up.

On this basis I would say NO!

A pair of plastic boobs won't repair a low self esteem. It will for a while, but deep down it won't even touch the root of the problem.

I would suggest she invests in councelling and learning to love herself how she is, an then in a few years time, when she's happy with herself, she can then think about getting plastic boobs if she still wants them.

Personally I think she's very selfish, because that £7500 could be spent on your children, and I think it's disgusting that someone would prioritize a pair of fake boobs ahead of their children and partner, no matter how low their self esteem.

meester

JayB wrote: »

She went and saw a consultant and they offerered her finance if she couldnt pay for the op in one go....Paying back an extra £2K on £5.5K op over 5 years (£130 p/m)

Loans should not be reckoned in monthly payments, the important thing is the interest rate.

£130 pm for 60 months is £7,800, which is more than £2k extra. Perhaps the payment is slightly less than £130? At £127 pm, the rate comes to 14.9%. That's a rip-off.

Nobody should borrow money at 14.9%.