How to tell a child that their mother has died.

Zara33

Thankyou all for your kind words, Thursday was a complete blur.
I thought i was strong but when i saw the hearse pulling up outside the house on Thursday i started blubbing like a baby christ knows how i managed to drive behind the hearse, but it's done my little sister is at peace now no more pain.

I do however thing that my nephew may need someone to talk to about it all as we had a little chat last night...and he said that if he was to get ran over then he could go up to heaven and see his mum and he has also started talking about running away

Kimberley

Sorry to hear this Zara, he will heal in time, all you can do is be there for him and give him as much love as possible. You also need a ((hug))

It would be easier for him if you all could remember the good times and the funny things your sister did and laugh about them.

taxi73

sorry to hear what you and your poor nephew are going through at the moment...Sending you hugs and condolences xxxx
Sounds like your little nephew could do with some councilling.It may be worth giving the school a call to take them up on their offer.
Are you dealing with all this by yourself?as you don't mention grandparents or any other relatives.
The ideas for a memory box are also lovely.Try and take care of yourself as well xxxx

fraz_babe

Im so sorry about your loss zara. My thoughts are with you. Your sister is at peice now. And i bet shes looking down on you and so proud ! I know i would be. I hope the future brings you, your nephew & your family as much happiness as possible. You have done your sister & your nephew proud. she can rest in peice now. RIP. xxx

poppyolivia

Zara, sorry but just found this thread, thinking of you and your family.

I'm no expert but I think the wee fella might need a wee hand in things xxx

Clive_Woody

Zara33 wrote: »

Thankyou all for your kind words, Thursday was a complete blur.
I thought i was strong but when i saw the hearse pulling up outside the house on Thursday i started blubbing like a baby christ knows how i managed to drive behind the hearse, but it's done my little sister is at peace now no more pain.

I do however thing that my nephew may need someone to talk to about it all as we had a little chat last night...and he said that if he was to get ran over then he could go up to heaven and see his mum and he has also started talking about running away

So sorry to hear you sad news.

When the little lad is ready you need to focus on positives and tell him what a wonderful life his mummy would want him to live. Tell him how his mum is watching and smiling down from above, he will never be alone and if ever he needs to talk to her she is listening, she just can't talk back. Make sure he had a really nice photo of her to remember he by, sadly time can dull memory so help him keep his mum as she was in his mind. Tell him how his mum would want him to always do his best and she would ask no more of him, if he tried hard then she has a special big smile for him. Celebrate her birthday and let this be a special day to remember her, make it a happy day and talk of all the good times.

Just be there for him when he needs you. I don't know if he is a bit young for a mobile phone, but if he has one let him have your number to call whenever he needs to hear a friendly voice.

Zara33

Happy Birthday little sis :smileyhea :bdaycake: Not a day goes by that we don't think about you love you forever and ever. xoxo

Toto

I hope your little sis is having a wonderful birthday Zara. I'm sure she is looking down on you all with love and huge pride.

I lost my mum to breast cancer and it is a vile disease. I am still friends with the husband of one of the young ladies who were going through chemo with her. The lady was only 28 and had a 5 year old and an 8 month old baby when she passed 8 years ago. My mum cared so much more about Lizzie's life than her own, the day Lizzie died was the day mum gave up.

But those two little boys are such an inspiration (a word that gets thrown around too often). The kids have grown and cherish the memory of their mum even though the little one has no memory of her at all. The oldest recently befriended another child who has lost a parent to cancer and is councelling him in a way only a child can. I am so very very proud of those kids.

I hope your wee man is coping and is a huge comfort to you. It is true when they say that time is a great healer, after 8 years I still think about mum every day but not with sadness, of course sometimes the tears come but mostly I remember what made her special and I smile from the heart. Time doesn't erase the love you felt though, you will still love your sister until your dying day even though you have learned how to laugh again and enjoy life.

UKTigerlily

I've just noticed this thread & althought it's a few months since she passed away, I just wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss, and your Nephew's. Happy Birthday to your Sis, i'm sure she'd be so proud of you & her Son. I hope you're both doing ok xx

sarymclary

Happy birthday to Zara's little sis!

It was my husband's birthday yesterday, and I took all the flowers growing in our garden down to his grave. It looks like a demented spring fairy has had a fit there now, but I thought he'd quite like that! He always bought me flowers, so it's nice to return the favour.

I hope you and your family are coping, and that's essentially what you do for the first couple of years. It will stop feeling quite so raw, but you never, ever forget, and you never stop loving them.

How is your nephew? I hope he is getting along OK. My sons were 12, 10, 6 & 3 when they lost their daddy, but I am constantly amazed at how they have coped, and taken everything in their stride.

I hope you are OK too.

Thinking of you & your's. xxx