Single and in debt.

skint_spice

I totally agree with sarah on this michelle - he must like you! I hope you have a great time on saturday and make sure you report back on how it went.

Ossireo

runmichellerun wrote: »

But if I get my hopes up and it goes badly then it'll hurt all the more...

Just try to go with the flow hun, and it is a 2nd date afterall!!

I feel exactly the same way as you with the getting hopes up etc but the other side of me says unless we take a bit of a gamble then we will never get anywhere!!

Also welcome to the new additions to our happy group ... dodgy hugs all around :grouphug:

tomstickland

It's easy to become jaded due to the excessive number of internet dating sites that turn into an endless trudge of disappointment. At the same time you'll keep reading success stories. I'm not bitter though!

RosaBernicia

Hi all

First hugs for everybody that needs them :grouphug: :grouphug:... and good luck to Michelle with tall and interesting!

Plus just a couple of thoughts...

re. renting... is it the renting itself that gets you down, or the situation? If there are things you're fed up with in the house, it might be worth moving somewhere that suits you better even if you don't own it. (I left a houseshare with 3 others last year, I got on very well with one of them but not the two others and didn't feel like the place was mine. I now share with one other person who is lovely and works away a lot. I love it here :j as I have time to myself to study, a huge garden to work on, a spare room to have friends over, can sort the house how I like it, and yet don't have to live on my own (which would be a bad idea as I'd disappear into my bookcase and never be seen again LOL)). Admittedly I think sharing gets harder as you get older and grumpier (or it that just me?) but all flatmates are not equal!

and going out on your own... I think how easy this is depends on what you pick. When I was abroad I used to go out by myself to local pub gigs etc, am not really brave enough to do that any more but there are other things you can do where you might meet people but don't have to be ultra-social - eg. lectures, book readings, seated concerts. I think it's easier to do things which have a defined time, then you can arrive just in time and not worry about hanging around beforehand, and choose whether you want to stick around after. It also gets easier as you try it and realise you're not the only person there on your own! and if it's something you're already interested in, you'll have something to say to anyone you do get chatting to. I usually don't mind going on my own if it's somewhere I can take a book along. Am also an evening class fan - starting two next month and one involves meetings at the police college so fingers crossed for fit men in uniform

Re. dating sites, do people think some are better than others? I've been put off by horror stories from a couple of friends so haven't tried it yet.

'Night
RB xx

inthegreen

I have never liked the sound of dating sites although my friends think it's because I am being a bit snobby about it but it's because of the horror stories you hear.

Also I have loads of hobbies, running, horse riding, mountain biking, climbing etc and most of the ones I have seen don't seem to list any sort of sport or hobbies apart from going to the gym, going to the pub and clubbing which also puts me off as well!!:cool:

Buffythedebtslayer

inthegreen wrote: »

I have never liked the sound of dating sites although my friends think it's because I am being a bit snobby about it but it's because of the horror stories you hear.

Also I have loads of hobbies, running, horse riding, mountain biking, climbing etc and most of the ones I have seen don't seem to list any sort of sport or hobbies apart from going to the gym, going to the pub and clubbing which also puts me off as well!!:cool:

oh I had one today who had naturism as his hobby! :eek:

eco

naturism never seen anyone with that listed as an hobby, was he joking?

normdeplume

Hope you don’t mind if I gate-crash with a few thoughts of my own.

One of the things I like on this board is when someone in debt shares the problem with the OH who didn’t know and he or she takes it well. It’s genuinely heart-warming to read. Imagine being the beneficiary of such love.

I’m a single chap in my 40s and find the saddest part of debt is the loneliness it brings. I’ve only been able to talk to one friend about my own debts and he’s been brilliant. He’d even ring me from his family holiday to make sure I was okay and trying to take steps. (I’m down-sizing to deal with immediate debts before saving for a home of my own.)

With the worries about debt come a whole host of others in their wake. Does anyone have them too?

• Will I ever meet anyone?
• Will anyone be interested in someone skint?
• Why haven’t I more to show for my life?
• Am I past my best in terms of attractiveness?

I have tried internet sites. It’s hard making any headway, but I do know you’ve got to take the opportunity to try and put yourself in the shop window whenever you can.

I might draw the line at speed-dating though

ndp

eco

hiya normdeplume, of course you'll meet someone, it takes time, i'm not in debt but a crap saver and i'm single so at least were all in the single boat on this thread, and it helps to know others suffer with the same insecurities, so stay on here and chat, everyones really great

ziggles50

normdeplume wrote: »

Will I ever meet anyone?

• Will anyone be interested in someone skint?
• Why haven’t I more to show for my life?
• Am I past my best in terms of attractiveness?

ndp

Hi Norm...i'm 28 and i have those exact same thoughts myself (except the past my best...although of course that is relative!)
One does have to be positive about these things as it just makes everything else you have to do much harder so stop having such negative thoughts (i know easier said than done) and think about what's good in your life...like being able to tackle your debt and the myriad of things that could be going badly for you but aren't...also you have some support on here so that's gotta help