Single and in debt.

Buffythedebtslayer

:kisses: ahem TDQO we all notice you!!

pleasant dreamsxxx

TDQO

Lula-Hula wrote: »

Thanks Buffy, must catch up on your recent events soon, but right now i'm going to [strike]interrogate[/strike] be interested in TDQO .

Right then Mr

sorry if I've got it all wrong but I think you're on a gap year & currently working in NZ before embarking on a degree in something like environment, business or international studies type of thing ? Had a g/f back here but split when you went away ?

Now correct me & then make me apologise for not paying attention

You're close... but no cigar.

I'm on a placement year (same thing but with organised job) and living/working in Australia (NSW... can see the confusion lol). I'm 2/3 of my way through a degree in Mining Engineering... I did have a very lovely gf yes but we split before I went away.

You don't have to aplogise, you picked up more than almost anyone in my office has and I've worked with them for 3 months!

I'm currently planning on how I'm going to bed-hop around for the month I'm in the UK. I'm only at my mums house for a week but luckily I have a lot of beautiful female friends who let me share their beds :cool:

Ossireo

Dropping in briefly, sorry to hear about your predicament Lula, hate that rug pulled out from under you panic feeling, however I am sure like others have mentioned there is not much he can do.

Things rather hectic here, have spent a couple of days starting to sort the old 'marital' home. All rather soul destroying. Its become very apparent that my ex-DH has been in a lot of strife that seemed to have started around 2005. He basically just upped and left the house xmas 2006 .. the tree is still up and my DS presents are all still on the floor .. milk still in fridge, not a clean plate in the house etc. We disposed of well over 100 empty wine bottles and today going through the post for last 2 years that was in the hall and stuffed in cupboards has been depressing. Magistrates fines, Council Tax arrears, Bailiffs notes etc He really is a prime example of someone who has no idea how to manage his money, and I partly caused that as I did everything for him.

Sometimes I think what the hell have I taken on, but then I remember the cheaper rent, the warm house, the lack of slugs and woodlice all over the kitchen. A few people have been shocked that I would want to move to the old marital home, but it doesn't hold any particular strong memories for me, the upsetting bit is seeing the state it is in and realising how ill he must have been/is (and realising for some time my DS was sleeping over in this health hazard!)

I didnt get the job I interviewed for, which disappointed me a fair bit, but going to keep searching! Things still going well with SC, its so radically different from the first try, we are seeing each other more and working on the whole joint insecurity thing but yes I am actually quite :blushing: but shhhhhh :shhh: dont tell anyone as I normally manage to jinx it the minute I start telling people about it!

Anyway, much love to you all and share some of that chocolate! I have none here .. actually DS has a caramel rice krispie bar in the fridge I may steal hmmm

TDQO

Well at least you're looking on the bright side. Are you keeping all the paperwork as a record or just ditching it? Has no one at all been living there for two years??

Ossireo

Its been unlived in since end of 2006 :eek: yet he never closed the place down so to speak, never officially moved out so all the bills etc he is still paying.

I'm trying to get him to work with me to sort out his debts, but there is only so much I can do ... HSBC cancelled his £1800 overdraft last month and have been bouncing stuff for months etc. I am going to try to get him sat down to do a claim for charges as he is paying over £100 a month in that alone!. Also been trying to get him to open a basic bank account so HSBC cant just take what they like but I think he is still in ostrich mode:rolleyes:

I'm probably coming over some how all attached or holding a flame or something, but sorting this all out will hopefully lead to him getting back on track and be better for my DS in the long term. It may not work, but at least I will be able to tell myself I did all I could to help

TDQO

Not a nice situation. All I'm going to say is that I hope you've made it very clear that he doesn't live there anymore. Are there any of his debts secured on the house???

Ossireo

Only the mortgage is secured on the property and has been continuously paid. To also clarify, the "wouldn't touch with a barge-pole" mentality is from both sides, trust me. When I left the decision was a joint one and the reason I went rather then him was due to him needing the property as he had a job that required kennels on site and wouldn't have been able to do that in a rented place. Don't get me wrong, I care a lot for the man, and we have always kept it beyond amicable (we do all the school stuff with DS together etc) however looking back I would say the affection was more a Brother Sister deal then anything else and that is not what either of us want froma relationship :rolleyes:

Besides I don't think our respective partners would like it if he lived there, especially as SC will be moving in as well at some point :rotfl: (which to further clarify ex-DH knows about and has met SC... gosh reading it back I really DO have an odd life)

I will share a quick tale that may make you chuckle...at my nans funeral my mum had a little too much vino. Ex-DH and current BF were there. We were standing around chatting and she pulled over a relative that I last met when I was about 5. Her introduction was ... " Here is my daughter, her husband and her boyfriend" .. never seen anyone back away so quickly!

SunderlandBlackCat

Ossireo wrote: »

I will share a quick tale that may make you chuckle...at my nans funeral my mum had a little too much vino. Ex-DH and current BF were there. We were standing around chatting and she pulled over a relative that I last met when I was about 5. Her introduction was ... " Here is my daughter, her husband and her boyfriend" .. never seen anyone back away so quickly!

Thanks - crap day at work & that's given me a little laugh.

Paulgonnabedebtfree

TDQO wrote: »

This is why I very rarely buy chocolate, it's far too easy to eat!

I say eat every last crumb in the house then tell everyone someone mugged you as you were carrying pressies to your car... win-win situation as they'll then buy you sympathy chocolate!

I have a magnet on my fridge. It reads "Chocolate makes your clothes shrink"

RosaBernicia

Hi all

Wow, two days out and look what I miss.

:grouphug: for Lula. Look after yourself petal and you know we're here.

:j Buffy, if this is the ex you mentioned you obviously still think about him so go for it

Mini-update from me:
Nothing yet from car bloke which is good as the closer we get to payday the better.
One potential replacement flatmate fallen through, but she's going to be around town so hopefully a new buddy.
The replacement flatmate I was angling for already signed up for somewhere else, but that means he hasn't moved in with his ex :j and was v friendly when bumped into him yesterday :j so fingers crossed. Am determined to get to him in the new year!

Have also developed huge crush on a guy I sort of work with, we were at the same meeting on Monday and I kept missing things 'cause I was thinking of better uses for him . Not likely to go anywhere (he's halfway across the country, though no wedding ring and I think he was looking at me too) but great fun feeling like I am 17 and in class again.

Really have to do stuff and get to bed at a decent hour for once so must love you and leave you.

Rosa xx