If not for my sister and her kids I'd have given it all up - but I'm still here!!!

Mupeteer

I'm so-so at the moment. I have an ok 5 minutes followed by 5 lousy ones.
I got an appointment to see the doc yesterday (not one of my preferred docs but I went anyway). She basically said that she reckons my meds are probably working and that I should expect to feel rubbish (well, duh!). She suggested that I exercise, tell my sister how bad I feel (yeah, right, she must have missed the bit I said about not worrying her anymore than she doeas already) and said I should phone the Samaritans if I feel really bad. She will refer me to the CPN but that could take weeks. So, not a great deal of use.
She also offered to sign me off work but I said that would be a bad idea. At least it makes me get out of bed every day, never mind the fact that I wouldn't get paid if I didn't work.
Last night I went to bed as soon as I got home and slept pretty much right through the night again. That's always been my way of dealing (or not) with things - if I'm asleep I'm not thinking about it. Great, eh? Ostrich or what?

Buffythedebtslayer

Mupeteer wrote: »

Last night I went to bed as soon as I got home and slept pretty much right through the night again. That's always been my way of dealing (or not) with things - if I'm asleep I'm not thinking about it. Great, eh? Ostrich or what?

Thats exactly what I do. exactly. am much happier when asleep! or knowing I will be asleep soon. I hate the way my brain thinks about things and hope that whilst I am asleep I will work out an answer..........

doing is the way forward. Sorry Mupet I am not being much use at the moment got a horrible headache had it for three days, I just wanted to let you know i am thinking of you and hoping you are doing ok.

hugs

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mupeteer

Thanks Buffy, I hope the headache gets better soon.

I was full of good intentions for tonight, had a list written for all the things I wanted to get done and I've done none of it. I blame the internet! It's fatal. i sat down to check my emails and I'm still here 3 hours later. I've been playing about on bebo and doing other random stuff. There's always tomorrow.:o

kika

You're right internet is fatal but tomorrow really is another day so start afresh. Time spent on mse isn't wasted of course:D

VLADTHEIMPALA

Mupeteer wrote: »

Thanks Buffy, I hope the headache gets better soon.

I was full of good intentions for tonight, had a list written for all the things I wanted to get done and I've done none of it. I blame the internet! It's fatal. i sat down to check my emails and I'm still here 3 hours later. I've been playing about on bebo and doing other random stuff. There's always tomorrow.:o

I know this sounds a bit pathetic coming from me, but I have been exactly the same. Sleeping to avoid worries is fine until you realise a)it doesn't work because nothing is ever dealt with, and it doesn't work because the subconscious takes over. Apparently I have been having loud arguments with my bosses in my sleep. The answer is to pace yourself. I keep a list on excel of the things I ought to do, and I change the colours once I've done something. You can't do it all at once - that's how you end up overwhelmed before you begin. I have to list what's necessary and then prioritise. It's amazing how fast you see these little 'achievements build up, and after a few weeks you look back and think 'was that what I was worrying about so much then?' xxx:D

Burlesque_Babe

Mupeteer wrote: »

I'm so-so at the moment. I have an ok 5 minutes followed by 5 lousy ones.

and soon that will be 10 ok ones and 5 bad ones, then 15 good ones etc. You'll get there xxx

Mupeteer

Why does my dad have to be such a complete !!!!!!? I'd been having a pretty good day, had dinner with my sister then we went to see my dad for a bit. He was a grumpy !!!!!! so, rather than end up arguing with him as is usual, I said I was leaving and went to walk out. He asked if that's the way I leave him now. My reply was "yes, when you're in a mood like this," and I left. My sister, who was half cut after a glass of wine stayed there for another 10 minutes while I waited outside. One of my neices came out to keep me company. I really felt sorry for them, being caught in the middle of it. Then, when my sister finally came out, she tells me that I'm just as he is. No. It's just that he never treats her like that so she doesn't see it. I figured that leaving and avoiding any added hassles would be the best thing but now she's saying I'm as bad as he is. I am so !!!!ed off now and angry at him for making me feel like this every time I see him and angry at myself for letting him do this to me. He makes me so angry.

piglet6

Hi Mupeteer

Sorry to hear about your Dad's behaviour - families, eh?! If only we could choose them like we choose our friends!!

Well done on walking away and not arguing with him, though - you did the right thing... Try not to let him get to you - easier said than done, I know!

Hugs!

Piglet

moodydonkey

OMG my dad is exactly the same. He's the only person who can make me cry with just one sentence yet treats my sister like she can walk on water. You did the right thing by walking out.
Maybe he just doesn't do feelings or maybe he's like a little kid and it's an attention seeking thing!!!!!

Mupeteer

Thanks guys, it's so difficult because I l know he's a !!!! but it still gets to me. And I think you could be right about the attention thing. He's never happy unless he's the funny one or unless he has the last word.