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How do you cope when you can't move?

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going_nowhere_fast
going_nowhere_fast Posts: 377 Forumite
edited 24 June 2014 at 5:00PM in House buying, renting & selling
Any advice

Can't move for a very long time yet, need to clear debts first and then build up some savings but where I live is REALLY starting to get me down. Renting is not an option. Really, I just need to learn to put up with where I am now until I'm in a position to move. But how do you do that?

The walls are paper thin - I irritates listening to everybody's daily life.

I live in a deprived area which is depressing.

I long for the days when I can sit in my back garden on a sunny day and just enjoy the sunshine and some peace and quiet without idiots having loud music on, shouting at one another, swearing etc.

If I knew I could put my house on the market within the next 6 months I'd be able to think great, just hang in there but how do you do it when it's more likely to be 6 years?!!

I need to get a grip on my spending to improve my situation but it's so tempting to spend on petrol or something to escape being here.......

I like my actual house though, it's just a shame about the location, area and neighbours!!!!!!


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Comments

  • jaylee3
    jaylee3 Posts: 2,127 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
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    There comes a time when bankruptcy is the only option.

    Have you thought of this?

    You could start afresh immediately.

    So you can't borrow, or get credit, and your credit record will be on the skids. But will you actually be any worse off? You say you are looking at being in debt for at least 6 years anyway.
    (•_•)
    )o o)╯
    /___\
  • Quizzical_Squirrel
    Quizzical_Squirrel Posts: 152 Forumite
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    Spend less time at home and more in the places you love.
    Expand what you think of as 'home' so the percentage of the $hitty bit goes down.
  • going_nowhere_fast
    going_nowhere_fast Posts: 377 Forumite
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    I know nothing about bankruptcy but i presume it would mean losing my house. As much as I hate where it is I don't want to lose it.

    I have new neighbours who are so noisey (music, shouting, and i'm surprised my house is still standing with the force they slam their front door) and since they have arrived how I feel about where I live has changed from knowing we will move at some point in the future to suddenly being desperate to get away from here as soon as possible.

    I keep thinking I need to learn more about part ownership and see if that is a route for the future but in the meantime how do I cope.

    I would love to just read a book and curl up on the sofa but can't because the noise from next door is just leaves me with knotts in my stomach and I feel really anxious and teary.
  • going_nowhere_fast
    going_nowhere_fast Posts: 377 Forumite
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    Quizzical_Squirrel wrote: »
    Spend less time at home and more in the places you love.
    Expand what you think of as 'home' so the percentage of the $hitty bit goes down.

    Ooooh what do you mean, expand what you think of as home? I like the sound of the $hitty bit decreasing :j
  • jaylee3
    jaylee3 Posts: 2,127 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
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    going_nowhere_fast wrote: »
    I know nothing about bankruptcy but i presume it would mean losing my house. As much as I hate where it is I don't want to lose it.

    I have new neighbours who are so noisey (music, shouting, and i'm surprised my house is still standing with the force they slam their front door) and since they have arrived how I feel about where I live has changed from knowing we will move at some point in the future to suddenly being desperate to get away from here as soon as possible.

    I keep thinking I need to learn more about part ownership and see if that is a route for the future but in the meantime how do I cope.

    I would love to just read a book and curl up on the sofa but can't because the noise from next door is just leaves me with knotts in my stomach and I feel really anxious and teary.

    Not sure I can advise any further then sorry.

    Other than suggesting that you move your house brick by brick to the middle of a field, you're pretty much stuffed. You say the neighbours and the whole area are dreadful, so I can't fathom why you want to stay tbh.
    (•_•)
    )o o)╯
    /___\
  • going_nowhere_fast
    going_nowhere_fast Posts: 377 Forumite
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    jaylee3 wrote: »
    Not sure I can advise any further then sorry.

    Other than suggesting that you move your house brick by brick to the middle of a field, you're pretty much stuffed. You say the neighbours and the whole area are dreadful, so I can't fathom why you want to stay tbh.

    I don't want to stay here I just don't want to go in to rented and if i lost my house that would be the only option available to me.

    Im not being rude to any renters out there but I really do want to stay in a home I own/am buying. I know it's not a palace but I maintain it and keep it in good repair. I've seen a lot of rental properties that friends live in and they are paying twice what I do for houses which are to be blunt, scruffy and not maintained. It's not their fault, it's the landlords I know but I don't like it. I've never lived in rented so the thought is scary because where is the security? Do you not run the risk of having to move whenever your tenancy runs out.
  • jaylee3
    jaylee3 Posts: 2,127 Forumite
    Combo Breaker First Post
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    going_nowhere_fast wrote: »
    I don't want to stay here I just don't want to go in to rented and if i lost my house that would be the only option available to me.

    Im not being rude to any renters out there but I really do want to stay in a home I own/am buying. I know it's not a palace but I maintain it and keep it in good repair. I've seen a lot of rental properties that friends live in and they are paying twice what I do for houses which are to be blunt, scruffy and not maintained. It's not their fault, it's the landlords I know but I don't like it. I've never lived in rented so the thought is scary because where is the security? Do you not run the risk of having to move whenever your tenancy runs out.

    Well then, looks like you may have to stay. For now. Hopefully, the chavs will move out, and the area improves soon. Don't see what else you can do tbh.,

    Good luck though. You sound like a nice, breezy person. You deserve good luck. :)
    (•_•)
    )o o)╯
    /___\
  • going_nowhere_fast
    going_nowhere_fast Posts: 377 Forumite
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    Quizzical_Squirrel wrote: »
    :rotfl:
    I'm thinking of city dwellers and people in countries who don't have much housing space and so just use their place as a crash pad and really do all their 'living' elsewhere. In public areas.

    Oh I do that already. My garden is the local park don't you know. Already got the picnic blanket and coolbox out for tomorrow!
  • going_nowhere_fast
    going_nowhere_fast Posts: 377 Forumite
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    jaylee3 wrote: »
    Well then, looks like you may have to stay. For now. Hopefully, the chavs will move out, and the area improves soon. Don't see what else you can do tbh.,

    Good luck though. You sound like a nice, breezy person. You deserve good luck. :)

    Thank you. I hope they move too and soon.
  • going_nowhere_fast
    going_nowhere_fast Posts: 377 Forumite
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    I need coping strategies for the emotional and mental side of things. When you are stuck in a cr"p area with horrible neighbours it affects how you feel - feel frustrated, and anxious. There must be millions of people in this situ (watched neighbours from hell on channel 4 the other week) so how do they cope. One poor couple had been struggling with some squatters next door for more than ten years!!!!!!!!!!!!
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