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Funeral clothes for a toddler.

sulkisu
sulkisu Posts: 1,285 Forumite
in Marriage, relationships & families
My son's grandfather passed away recently and we will be attending the funeral. It will be a traditional church service.
My son is 20 months old and I'm not sure what to dress him in. I know that you can get suits for toddlers but I personally don't think it's necessary to buy something that he will only wear once and will soon outgrow. He has a pair of very dark jeans and I was planning on buying a dark top to go with it. My partner is okay with this, but other family members have raised an eyebrow - made tutting noises etc. Had anyone been in a similar situation and what did you buy/dress the child in?
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Comments

  • mummyroysof3
    mummyroysof3 Posts: 4,566 Forumite
    at 20 months i would do the best with what ive got and not spend any money..so dark jeans and dark top sound fine to me
    Have a Bsc Hons open degree from the Open University 2015 :j:D:eek::T
  • LandyAndy
    LandyAndy Posts: 26,377 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts
    mummyroysof3 wrote: »
    at 20 months i would do the best with what ive got and not spend any money..so dark jeans and dark top sound fine to me


    Sounds right to me too.

    The tutters should mind their own.
  • Mojisola
    Mojisola Posts: 35,571 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    sulkisu wrote: »
    My son's grandfather passed away recently and we will be attending the funeral. It will be a traditional church service.

    My son is 20 months old and I'm not sure what to dress him in. I know that you can get suits for toddlers but I personally don't think it's necessary to buy something that he will only wear once and will soon outgrow. He has a pair of very dark jeans and I was planning on buying a dark top to go with it. My partner is okay with this, but other family members have raised an eyebrow - made tutting noises etc. Had anyone been in a similar situation and what did you buy/dress the child in?

    People are upset at what a toddler might wear to a funeral! Let them tut away, if that makes them happy.

    They need to get their priorities right and concentrate on celebrating the life of the deceased.
  • Amanda65
    Amanda65 Posts: 2,076 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    Tbh I would have thought people would have more to worry about on the day than the fact that the baby was in dark jeans! I would go with your plan and I bet no-one will even comment / notice
  • poet123
    poet123 Posts: 24,099 Forumite
    I suspect that older family members may think jeans inappropriate funeral attire whatever the age of the wearer. Personally, I would either ignore them or to keep the peace, buy a cheap pair of dark pull on trousers and a dark collared top. Entirely your call.
  • pmlindyloo
    pmlindyloo Posts: 13,090 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I am wondering if it is the jeans aspect of this that people are 'tutting' about.

    The older generation might still be viewing jeans as 'casual wear' and see it as a sign of disrespect.

    Not condoning their 'tutting' (ridiculous in my opinion) but personally I would just be dressing him in ordinary clothes, subtle rather than bright and just ignore any comments.

    PS Sorry, crossed posts.
  • heretolearn_2
    heretolearn_2 Posts: 3,565 Forumite
    or how about making it look a bit more formal by getting a white shirt and dark tie to go with the jeans?
    Cash not ash from January 2nd 2011: £2565.:j

    OU student: A103 , A215 , A316 all done. Currently A230 all leading to an English Literature degree.

    Any advice given is as an individual, not as a representative of my firm.
  • Kittendreich
    Kittendreich Posts: 420 Forumite
    I live near a crematorium and frequently see adults attending funerals not wearing suits and it is not unusual to see people in jeans (as well as workwear, bikers leathers, etc etc). I'm sure that his grandfather would rather you were there than sat at home because you didn't have 'the right thing' to put on your toddler. As long as he is clean and tidy it shouldn't matter what he wears - he is better being in familiar, comfortable clothes to make it more likely he will be relaxed and quiet during the service than dressed up in a daft outfit he'll never get the use of that might be uncomfortable and cause him to fuss.
  • DS4215
    DS4215 Posts: 1,085 Forumite
    At 20 months, the child is probably a little too young to sit still for the length of a funeral service anyway. I don't know if any other relatives are in a similar position, but maybe one of the mums (not directly related) might be able to watch all the children while you go to the service.
  • lolly_896
    lolly_896 Posts: 1,058 Forumite
    I'd have avoided the jeans, does he have any chino type trousers. And a shirt. As he is so young i wouldnt dress him in black/dark anyways. DS1 at my Grans funeral wore cream chinos and a white shirt.
    DFW Nerd #awaiting number - Proud to be dealing with my debts!

    Dont cry because it's over, smile because it happened.

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