Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 3

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  • System
    System Posts: 178,094 Community Admin
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    WaS as bad as it sounds i wouldnt want my mum there, i love her to pieces and she tries to understand my MH problems, but i dnt feel i could be open and honest with the assessor in front of her :( theres thing i shield her from that i'd feel uncomfrotable talking to her about.

    I dont think id be able to get a home assessment without imput from GP who i still need to see, plus its on tuesday so shrt notice to sort that. I'm just going to go. if i end up having a panic attack or in state then i suppose on the plus side they see first hand how my illness affects me.

    Talked to my manager today, told her i'm feeling very low and i feel like i'm on the verge of losing it completely. She told me she;d book me in for a holiday in 2 weeks time so id have time to clear my head, and if theres anything they can do they will do.

    Seeing Swain tomorrow, i know that will help seeing him. For some reason hes a very calming influence (and gives very good hugs!)

    Faerie, i'm going to look into support groups and try to go to one. I did try and go to one a few years ago, but couldnt find the building and panicked and ran away :o I think it might help to have a safe supportive environment with other people who know what i'm going through
  • Torry_Quine
    Torry_Quine Posts: 18,834 Forumite
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    Faerie you did really well helping your friend today. Hope all goes well tomorrow. If I could sleep better things would seem better. Going out next Thursday and hoping for good weather.


    Messed up. Not good that you have no one to go with you but it makes sense that you wouldn't feel completely comfortable talking about your health with your mum there. You have a good manager there too.
    Lost my soulmate so life is empty.

    I can bear pain myself, he said softly, but I couldna bear yours. That would take more strength than I have -
    Diana Gabaldon, Outlander
  • Pyxis
    Pyxis Posts: 46,077 Forumite
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    The regular repost........
    Pyxis wrote: »
    (The thread etiquette will be reposted every ten or so pages.)
    ........:starmod:......................................................................:starmod:.....................
    Here is the suggested THREAD ETIQUETTE. By following this etiquette, all posters, whether new or existing, will feel safe, unpressured and respected..

    !!!But first...............please be assured..................................................................******It should be pointed out that if anyone is feeling very distressed or close to a crisis, they do not have to worry about what they are posting, or whether it is a penguin for someone else or not. (See below about penguins). In a crisis situation, just post! We wouldn't want anyone to feel that they couldn't ask for help in case it's a penguin! The penguin thing only applies to a general discussion situation.******


    - This is a thread for support. We have discovered some good friends on here, but we promise always to welcome and include new people, and not to be cliquey.

    - People may make suggestions to help each other, and might even ask if the suggestions were helpful or have been carried out, but we'll really try not to nag each other or put too much pressure on.

    - The normal board rules about sexism, racism, homophobia etc. apply, but if we are careful we should be able to discuss almost anything without breaching board rules - so far we have discussed subjects ranging from child abuse to incontinence!

    -If someone thinks that too much pressure is being applied, they can post the trigger word PENGUIN and flag up the fact that they believe there's a potential for someone feeling too nagged to do something. ANYONE could post PENGUIN if they felt there was a danger that suggestions were being enforced too much.

    Similarly, if they want to discuss something that might be a trigger for some people, then posting PENGUIN would be a warning that what follows in the whiteout might be a trigger.



    - So, if you think something might be a PENGUIN, please post something like the green bit which follows.

    "Possible penguin about.........(Type of Trigger)" The trigger might be:- child abuse, marital abuse/violence, paranoia, stalkers, death, etc. (It's important to indicate the type of trigger, so that people can avoid reading it if they need to).

    Then, when you post, repost the word PENGUIN above the discussion. Then post the penguiny bit in white! And the phrase END OF PENGUIN when you have finished.

    It will look like this. You will be able to see the white text if you highlight it or if you quote it, (so please don't 'quote' a post containing a penguin onto the thread!)
    (Harmless example follows here):-
    PENGUIN

    This is a penguin. A nasty, crotch biting penguin (CBP).
    It isn't really! So you can look
    . https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ozGTv0hxhpc[/url]


    END OF PENGUIN

    (NB on a tenth-page repost of the etiquette, you can see these penguiny words because they are white against the green 'quote' background. On a normal post, they will be white against white, and so won't be seen on the thread.)

    IMPORTANT: It has been ascertained that some posters to this thread have found that there are certain subjects which act as triggers, precipitating a worsening of their condition.
    To protect these posters, you are respectfully requested NOT to discuss these subjects on this thread:-

    Religion. (Please note: it is recognised that everyone is entitled to their beliefs, and we respect those beliefs. It is only because of the fact that religion does act as a trigger for some posters, that we exclude it from discussion.)
    N.B. Please don't even mention the name of the religion.

    The afterlife. The reason for this is explained in this thread by one poster, and there will be others for whom this is a trigger.

    We ask and thank you for your co-operation in this matter.


    .........:starmod:.....................................................................:starmod:................

    !!!So, to reiterate..............******It should be pointed out that if anyone is feeling very distressed or close to a crisis, they do not have to worry about what they are posting, or whether it is a penguin for someone else or not. In a crisis situation, just post! We wouldn't want anyone to feel that they couldn't ask for help in case it's a penguin! The penguin thing only applies to a general discussion situation.******

    - More suggestions please.............We stress that we are suggesting that we AGREE some Thread Etiquette to HELP people who might feel anxious about posting, we are not trying to IMPOSE rules, just relating this to facilitating groups, so that people feel safe and able to participate as fully as they can.

    ...............Thread Motto...............
    Nos Omnes Ad Audiendum Parumper
    (I just lurve spiders!)
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    I love :eek:



  • System
    System Posts: 178,094 Community Admin
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    Faerie you did really well helping your friend today. Hope all goes well tomorrow. If I could sleep better things would seem better. Going out next Thursday and hoping for good weather.


    Messed up. Not good that you have no one to go with you but it makes sense that you wouldn't feel completely comfortable talking about your health with your mum there. You have a good manager there too.
    My manager has been really good to me, She had a period where she had some MH issues herself so i know she understands where i'm coming from an i feel i can talk to her. Her SIl has had MH problems and she asked me for advice so shes happy to help when she can. My supervisor offered to print off the DVLA fr i need to try ad get my bus pass sorted so thats something positive.

    I feel bad for my mum. I was the oldest and (thankfully) the only one with MH issues. I've apologized for how i was during my teenage years (we clashed A LOT),but she now tells me i was ill, they didnt know and it wwasnt my fault and after the last suicide attempt i saw how much it hurt her. Since then i try to protect her from the worst of it. I can talk to her about pretty much anything but my MH still feels like a bit of a no go area.

    Lol told Swain i was considering going to a BP support group, his response was if it helps he's all for it but if they turn out to be a cult i should run away :rotfl: i assured him its done my a bipolar charity and not some weird bipolar cult
  • System
    System Posts: 178,094 Community Admin
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    Also Pyxis, can you remind me again what our thread motto translates as? I;ve forgtten :o
  • Pyxis
    Pyxis Posts: 46,077 Forumite
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    edited 1 June 2016 at 11:10PM
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    MessedUp! At some point you'll have to have a pair of contrastingly coloured kittens and call one Arctic and the other Antarctic! :D






    ...............Thread Motto...............
    Nos Omnes Ad Audiendum Parumper

    Hahahahaha! It means: (Here) we (can) all be heard for a while!
    (I just lurve spiders!)
    INFJ(Turbulent).

    Her Greenliness Baroness Pyxis of the Alphabetty, Pinnacle of Peadom and Official Brainbox
    Founder Member: 'WIMPS ANONYMOUS' and 'VICTIMS of the RANDOM HEDGEHOG'
    I'm in a clique! It's a clique of one! It's a unique clique!
    I love :eek:



  • System
    System Posts: 178,094 Community Admin
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    Pyxis wrote: »
    MessedUp! At some point you'll have to have a pair of contrastingly coloured kittens and call one Arctic and the other Antarctic! :D






    ...............Thread Motto...............
    Nos Omnes Ad Audiendum Parumper

    Hahahahaha! It means: (Here) we (can) all be heard for a while!
    I like the idea of contrasting kittens! One day :D

    Ahh should have guessed that was the motto :o
  • faerielight
    faerielight Posts: 1,868 Forumite
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    thanks Tory.. I have terrible insomnia too.. it's te worst it's ever been.. is there anything you find helps? I think being behind a computer screen at night doesn't help, but I lack the dicipline to turn it off! I put marjoram and lavender oils on my pillow and cuddly toy.. I find the marjoram particularly relaxing, and finally, I always play this guided relaxation in bed..https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TDcGYmEgyM

    I like it in that half way in, the talking stops and it's just the sound of the sea.
    Many thanks to all who contribute on MSE :)
  • Gingernutty
    Gingernutty Posts: 3,769 Forumite
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    My therapist suggested Mindfulness training before I was discharged.

    It's very fashionable at the moment with apps, books, guided meditation CDs and downloads.

    I have a 'Go to sleep' CD which is very useful, that turns into sounds of the waves on a shore about half way through too.

    I keep it by my bed in a basic portable CD player and I've taken it out with me when I've stayed overnight in hotels - it's really helped.

    I've been lurking.

    In contrast to a number of posters, I'm wobbling away on the right track and thinking of you all.

    ((((hugs)))) to everyone who needs them.

    I've definitely been a lot brighter since the High Intensity CBT.

    Weight penguin

    I've lost about 2st 10lb so far and need to lose at least another 3.

    I've gone from the Obese to Overweight categories and can fit into some size 16 clothes (down from size 22).

    I'm quite please with my self in that regards. :)

    The flappy excess skin - not so much. :(
    End of Weight Penguin

    The next challenges now are to find a place to move to while works are being done on the house, move there and put all stuff I don't need into storage for a while, learn to drive and after that, try to get on top of the family photos.

    Every time I think I've got the order right, more show up that means I have to shuffle the order again.
    :huh: Don't know what I'm doing, but doing it anyway... :huh:
  • Torry_Quine
    Torry_Quine Posts: 18,834 Forumite
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    Gingernutty I have done some mindfulness ( from a Christian) perspective so maybe something to look at again.

    Faerie that's interesting.


    Hope we all get slept better tonight.
    Lost my soulmate so life is empty.

    I can bear pain myself, he said softly, but I couldna bear yours. That would take more strength than I have -
    Diana Gabaldon, Outlander
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