Desperate, am I in the wrong place?

debtweary

Hello FMN,

Pania is right, pay your bills in the order of importance and credit cards are last on the list as unsecured debt. Don't worry about your pile of letters they are just computer generated. Do be concerned about the charges though and write to the companies in the collection depts, don't talk to their phone operators. You will just go round in circles. You may be able to just pay 1 pound token payments if you explain everything. Payplan and Debtline have template letters and will email you all the info prewritten to each company if you talk to them. We did this and took their advice to self negotiate.
We do have income left over each month for pro-rata payments but we still fall short of 1200 pounds to make the full payments(our debts are huge). All the companies have been good so far but it is early days in this process for us too. However, taking control puts you in the driving seat. The companies are able to help- you if you write to them. Always agree payments in writing and don't miss a payment even if it is only a pound or they get cross.

I hope your job works out. I went back to work five years ago after the third one started school. I've been promoted twice since then and am on course for several pay increments. So it can be done and in a few years who knows what you will be earning.

Sell everything you don't use. Childrens clothes always sell well. We sold jewellery at a modern day pawn style shop recently(it is only jewellery after all).

I no longer switch on lights all over the house. All the expensive lamps and multi bulb lights are redundant and candles for low lighting in the dining room and living room are catching on. Nowhere else as I don't want a fire to add to our problems!

Still enjoy time out with your OH. My OH and I are closer than ever before because we are working through are problems together. We don't go out spending money but we go for long coastal walks with the kids and fishing etc. You don't have to spend money to enjoy yourselves and if your walking together your talking together- its very therapuetic.

Good luck once more x

pania

insurances lapses must be avoided if you can. sorry, who are you with right now and do you have enough life cover aside from your endowments to cover the mortgage and debt? if you cash in the endowments you may need to consider this. but try not to let any lapse if you can help.

have you considered ebayable items yet? any outgrown clothes from the children? any preloved toys that can go? dvd's and books do very well on amazon just ensure you don't get stung by the postage. PM me anytime you need to chat hon, I work from home so am usually here. xxx

Forgetmenot68

Morning all

Thanks Pania xx. I've just spoken to the National Debtline, and they said confirmed what you said about insurance. Will have to grit my teeth and add to our overdraft to pay for those when they're due this month. I just assumed that credit cards musts be paid to avoid our rating being affected.... but I guess it's going to be affected anyway. Amazing how the scales are dropping away from my naive eyes. The lady on the phone suggested I got financial advice for the endowment policy sale, which I will do. first I have to open a new bank account and she's given me details of what type of account and who to try (Nationwide). Taking pics for Ebay is on my list. Do you know when their next 10p listing day is?

Thank you Debtweary - Debtline is going to send me the template letters offering token payments to our creditors, and the procedure for doing it. Hopefully we'll reduce our deficit one way or another over the next couple of months and we'll have something more material to offer them. We're trying to enjoy time together, but there is still a lot of tension. I did Race for Life with my daughter yesterday (she organised it - wanted to do it in memory of her sister and has raised £500 so far!) and that was nice, but I couldn't help criticising my husband for the way he was driving the car to get there - because of the worry about diesel costs - not nice of me. Thank you so much for your good luck wishes.

And I have a job interview on Thursday at 2pm for the local sales job! The consultant suggested they were really keen, so fingers crossed....

Forgetmenot68 xx

pania

:j :T :j :T :j :T :j :T :j :T :j :T :j :T :j :T :j :T

theres not much more to say than that really is there!!!:D

Forgetmenot68

That really brought a smile to my face!!! Thanks Pania! xxxx

Seaxwyn

Wow! That was quick! Best of luck with the interview - we will all be keeping our fingers crossed for you on Thursday.

Paige

Good luck with the interview XXXX

Paige

Forgetmenot68

Thank you so much Paige and Seaxwyn. I just so hope I get it. It would help so much.

I've had an idea, which maybe someone can tell me whether it is ethical/sensible. At the moment we're up to date with payments on our cards, so in theory we could draw cash on them, which we could pay into our current account to keep it in the black. Typing that I can see why it's a bad idea - as we've already logged calls to the CCCS and Debtline... it is wilfully extending our debt to particular creditors when we know we can't repay. I guess if we did that we couldn't expect them to be nice to us and agree to a token payment each month until we can afford more... I guess, or am I wrong?

Oh and the lady at Debtline said we absolutely must not tie any more of our debt to the house. I said to my husband just now that we might have just gone ahead and added £49,000 to our mortgage if we'd been able, without taking any more advice, and that would have meant the very real threat of losing our house.... :eek:

Forgetmenot68 xx

Jelly_Babies

Just logged on to see how you are doing and so pleased. You have made such huge steps, well done :T

I'm not experienced in CCCS re drawing off the credit cards, but it may not be the best idea as the credit card companies may think you aren't playing fair IYSWIM?

Really am pleased you came on here and your posts are so positive and good luck with interview!!

Forgetmenot68

Oh, thank you Jelly Babies for that! xx

As I said in an earlier post, I really don't know what state I'd be in if it hadn't been for the support I've received on here this past... only six days...! It feels a lot longer in some ways. I will be so glad when I can get out of emergency mode. At the moment I feel I need to allot every minute of each day to problem solving my way through this.

IF I get this job or a job this month that will se some relief, but when I receive the template letters I will start writing to our creditors in the hope that they'll freeze interest, and accept token payments until we can afford more. It's not going to be fun, but we'll get there, I do believe it now.

Forgetmenot68 xx