DMP Mutual Support Thread (Part 4)

newlywed

rayday2 wrote: »

Well its not like your planning it, its just keeping options open which I can understand.

I like to find out all the what could happens and possabilities in life. Our debt is joint so we can't do bankrupcy without risking our home and we are bottom of the property ladder with not so much rental possabilties in the area.

Yeah in that sense I'm glad we're in a housing association flat as that means its pretty secure for life (as long as we pay rent). Before finding this site I would have been horrified to think of bankruptcy and although I know it's not a pleasant experience, if it came to it, I could deal with it (with the help of this site).

The thought does go through my mind too that if I ever fell pregnant (really seriously hope not but I'm a realist and sometimes things happen that you didn't plan) then I'd need to know what could be sorted with regard to the debts/job etc - being pregnant would freak me out enough without having everything else to deal with :rotfl:

Hopefully I can pay the debt off in the next 4-5 years and be done with it all and just enjoy life a bit more But the step kids might be 15/18 by then so who knows what life will bring

ald65

Hi rayday/newlywed

I just wanted to say that I think that you are both being really sensible, ultimately family and health have to come first.
Good luck to you both with whatever you decide

maz1964

hiya all come along to update myself with what life is throwing at everyone today

thanks rayday and newlywed for sharing your thoughts, it kind of hit a nerve with me today too

im off still from work with stress/depression and under a psychiatrist so am taking the help being given to me, am getting better but i do want to go back to work but not ideal to the complaints team i was in, so now im too in that dilema, need money to pay my debts off as quickly as poss, only work part time, can do more hours soon as dd is off to college.

However, i m due to see doc tomorrow again gp and the pys and see what happens if they recommend i can go back then i feel im getting there, but am scared if i only get given the same job, been in the comp for 11 years so feel i want to stay but also feel, maybe i need a change.

so yes, health is very paramount in my mind but life throws stuff at you and the debts are a constant reminder i need to get well, so sometimes is a circle of emotions etc

i know i need to address lots of issues which ive come a long way so far, and i do feel strengthened by this forum and the cyber friends ive made in tackling my debts, joined a gym and that is helping just come back, and i feel im slowly getting my zest for life back.

all i can say is that sometimes things are sent to us to deal with so it shows our strength of character, and i know rayday you will assess everything and find the right answer, newlywed, i guess with you the same, but you need to be happy in your job so other problems then can be overcome far more easier, hope that makes sense.

Me - yes i do hope to win that lotto or the pools, but im beginning to feel, that im getting stronger so who knows, i might not even go back just take out a 6 month carear break and try some volunteering, but the money to pay my debts is stopping me in my tracks at the moment. However, im ever faithful that one of my competitions will win me an amount so that i can make my dream come true.

Reality check, maybe see what happens tomorrow if i get to stay off a bit more then given the green light to go back and if offered a different postition will try it out, and then i too will have to make some scary decisions.

Good luck to us all and i hope ive not offended anyone with my ramblings today

ciao have a fun afternoon MAZ

rayday2

Maz you have not offended anyone at all.

And erm I will confess I did consider posting my SOA for people to have a look at but I couldn't face it being ripped apart, there are baddies on there but I did think twice about them and thought no on a DMP I do "need" those things - one big baddy I don't need and you struck a chord there Maz is my direct debit to the lottery - I honestly don't expect millions my hubby jokes he has to be a murderer to win or something! But at strange times I have won the odd £100 that has been absolutely necessary so I call it my charity donation and you never know!

Probably too darn optomisitic but at a pinch it can go - there is also small amounts of savings to the girls that could go - but I want them to have options and its not much.

Maybe with your work with the doctors behind you, you negotiate your way into a new position (assuming its a large company) a good friend of mine did with the council and she has never looked back since.

newlywed

rayday2 wrote: »

And erm I will confess I did consider posting my SOA for people to have a look at but I couldn't face it being ripped apart, there are baddies on there but I did think twice about them and thought no on a DMP I do "need" those things

I posted on the reduce gas and electric challenge and got slated by one poster for the fact that I use a dishwasher and won't give it up as I couldn't bribe the OH to wash up for 20p a go :rolleyes: They implied that that was the reason for my debt :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

How many 20p dishwasher cyles will it take to pay off £30k worth of debt - I mean come on!!!!!

As others have posted the point of a DMP is to have a reasonable lifestyle - not extravagant in any way, but not some sort of miserable penniless existence!

Life is worth so much more than any amount of money. And although I do feel we should pay debts off, if at all possible - sometimes and for some people, it's just not possible to do that and still be glad to be alive.

Do your best, do what you can, and sometimes a challenge is good for us so that we know what we could achieve. But don't do it at the expense of your physical or mental health!

newlywed

Oooh just worked it out - if I stopped using the dishwasher then I might not need the DMP as I could pay my debt off in approximately 577 years :rotfl:

rayday2

Well I committed the ultimate sin my dishwasher broke and I went out the way to buy a new one - 99p off ebay!

I refuse to live without my dishwasher, we initially got the first one when we were working 5 jobs between us and now I have had one and refuse to be without - same with my tumble dryer. I just don't have enough rooms to air 5 peoples clothes, 4 of them wearing uniforms. And see I am full of excuses my house would look like a laundry!

People are so up there own bums and superior sometimes with there we are paying things off aren't we great attitude. Lets hope they never have a redundancy or divorce, life can throw things at you and you can end up despite owning appliances in trouble

Is it really only 20p a cycle? I thought it was 50p - I may put mine on more often now rofl

maz1964

thanks to you both rayday and newlywed, both right of course!

yes i havent posted my soa but have taken the info ive read and readjusted what i felt i needed to do,
so yes changed telephone, got free interent with orange, fab, changed my mbi to only about 10.00 a month from 20.00 odd, dont have sky or the likes, have italian satelite and freeview, so no charges extra there

yes its a big corporate co - a bank, so while they have made losses re credit crunch, just want to get back to working and being happy in my work -

relooked at food shopping and have addressed this drastically and we are eating much better now and only shop with cash and i note it all down in my red book,

so yes ive addressed a lot of stuff and not spent on any more credit since jan 08. i just want to get rid of the debts asap.

so yes a challenge, i feel im continuing my challege with all this debtbusting journey im on , but also my health is getting much better too, as knowledge really is a powerful help.

have a fun day ciao for now MAZ

newlywed

rayday2 wrote: »

People are so up there own bums and superior sometimes with there we are paying things off aren't we great attitude. Lets hope they never have a redundancy or divorce, life can throw things at you and you can end up despite owning appliances in trouble

Is it really only 20p a cycle? I thought it was 50p - I may put mine on more often now rofl

Very true!!!
apparently about 14-22p a cycle plus 4p water (if metered) plus detergent of course -which in my case is Aldi 2.99 for 40 tablets. Who honestly could you bribe to do two sink fulls of washing up for under 50p!!!

I actually think I would be more upset about the dishwasher packing up than the washing machine But probably coz I'd take my clothes over to me mum and wash them there!!! Dishes don't travel so well Think I'd buy paper plates and throw them away to start with

newlywed

Linky.... look up your tumble dryer, dishwasher etc here:
http://www.sust-it.net/energy_saving.php?electricity=14&id=19

Tumble dryers are much worse than dishwashers - really rayday I think you should stop making excuses and get rid of both to save some money :rolleyes:

Just kidding!! But they are more expensive to run