Help! In trouble from keeping up with the joneses

smashedbooboo

Ooooooooookkkk peeps, lets not have anymore digs on here. We are here to help. And backbiting is not going to get anyone anywhere. And thats from a feisty lass from yorkshire. Now we need to get down to giving support and advice as best we can. x x x x

hypno06

aliasojo wrote: »

Note that the alarm bells are ringing for several doubters here, not just one cynical poster. :rolleyes:

Yes and my post was directed at all of them, not just you.

hypno06

Sorry, Smashed, I posted just as you were.

smashedbooboo

No worries babe x x

LilMissEmmylou

just a thought that i havent seen posted yet - u said u buy ur kids all the latest games and gadgets (which i guess ends up costing a small fortune) and you dont want them to know your in debt etc. Why not tell them you want to teach them the value of money. Give them an allowance for helping around the house/washing the car/helping with gardening etc. That way it looks to them like your being that mean old dad teaching them the value of money (which is a good thing to do so then they dont end up spending what they dont have in the future) and u can save some money without losing face.

aliasojo

PLavoie wrote: »

Wow, you are so insightful. It must really seem foreign to you that an American in debt is currently on a business trip and posting on a UK forum board right?

It doesn't seem foreign at all. It seems convenient.

It's fascinating how everything out of the norm for "aliasojo" MUST be a figment of their imagination. God forbid people outside of UK exist! But yeah, you're probably right, so if it makes you feel better, I'm just a 16 year old nerd from yorkshire with nothing else better to do than making up a story on debt because it's such an adrenaline rush to hear people give me advice on saving money!

The strange thing is....for whatever reason, people do actually do this.

However they do say fact is stranger than fiction so maybe you are for real. :rolleyes: Interesting British phrase there btw....'keeping up with the Joneses'.

Seriously, one simple advice for you: If you don't want to help, don't read this post. But don't come in here and tell me I'm making this stuff up, as this is my life I'm talking about. Thanks.

Sure, consider me done.

I do actually hope that IF you are for real, you get your situation sorted as I KNOW from personal experience how life debilitating having debts round your neck, can be. You DO really need to tackle your wife as a first step though. Trying to deal with anything else first will be an uphill struggle if you dont have her support.

Btw, hypnos.....I know you weren't singling me out especially, I just chose to answer, that's all.

Sorry guys, I know you think I'm being unfair here. Said my bit so I'll go sod off now. Keep dealing out the good advice, regardless of my thoughts on this poster, you do all do a good job in helping people.

poppyoscar_3

i think the green stance is a great idea too - nobody can argue with that and you might start a much needed trend!

i also think you owe it to your kids to show them what responsible spending is all about or they are going to end up in the same situation as you when they become adults.

i have to work with a strict budget, not because of debt, but because i don't earn much (decided quality of life was more important than consumables!!). i do a lot of basic stuff like turning off lights and sockets, meal planning (NO food goes to waste in my house) and having at least a day a week when i don't use my car (only a day because i drive for work). the little things soon add up.

i also look on it as a challenge. i have made a choice and i kind of enjoy the buzz of saving!

i think you're doing great to have recognised the problem, and now the bravest thing is going to be to face it head on. i agree with other posters - your family have to be on board too. i would put it to them that it's act now, or really suffer the consequences later.

good luck, and keep posting. i want to hear all about it when your debt starts coming down!

PO xx

LouiseJ

I dont think that a $110K salary a year which is roughly £60k here would come close to the income you need to the lifestyle that you are living.

You really are living well beyond your means and if you dont do something about it now then you will have no choice but to do something drastic later...or do you want to see you and your family being forced out of your home through lack of common sense.

We all have "Joneses" around us you know and sometimes it does make you wonder how some people do it. Well stop wondering they have either a) Budgeted and saved for the nice things that they have b) Inherited a load of dosh so they can buy whatever their heart desires OR c) in a !!!!!! load of debt that they are struggling to pay back.

And I dont think that sending the message to your kids that they can have whatever their little hearts desire without giving anything in return is just setting them up for a fall later in life.

Sorry if this sounds harsh but I think you need to give your head a shake and start doing something sensible NOW.

GeorgeUK

Can't really comment on how to save as we don't really know what your debts or other outgoings are. May as well cover one of the basics as you may not have looked into this yet.

Credit Cards: In the uk, seeking too much credit in a short space of time can damage your credit score. There are credit reference agencies that allow you to see your credit history (not worth paying to see the credit score as different companies will work this out differently) and how many companies have checked your record recently. 3 searches within a 6 month period are ok before the credit score is affected for most UK, but those with higher income can probably get a few more. If possible, i suggest you check your credit file and if everything is ok (few late payments or defaults), you could possibly apply for another creditcard or two.

The aim with these credit cards would be to take advantage of promotional 0% offers for balance transfers (BT). NEVER spend on these cards, but move debt that you have at the highest interest (15%?) onto these cards for about 12 months at 0%. The aim is to reduce the interest so that you can put this money towards the debt and reduce it quicker. If you continue to spend and not clear the debts though, you are just digging a bigger hole for yourself. Make sure that there is not a minimum monthly spending requirement or similar "fee" with the cards you get.

Remember, it's taken you years to create this debt so may take years to get out of. Just make sure the tide is moving in the right direction and you should hopefully be ok.

Skint_Catt

No talking of buying less, switching providers, cutting a holiday or two - no go for the jugular and take the children out of school and dump the country club. All the small steps add up and most of them won't be noticed! I think moderators should check out the IP address.