WHY can't anything ever go RIGHT???

immoral_angeluk

I want to go back to work. I've always been a very independant person and to be fair staying at home all day every day is driving me insane. I love my girls but I just can't cut it as a stay at home mum and I've got full respect for anyone who can.

The CAB WAS my hopes and dreams for the future.

(Land_of)_Maz

immoral_angeluk wrote: »

I I love my girls but I just can't cut it as a stay at home mum and I've got full respect for anyone who can.

Ditto that!

devonsdreamer

IA- In no way are you being selfish to want to organise your life so that you are doing something you want to do that may open up opportunites for you in the future that may help your family. Being a MUM does not mean that all your life has to be spent with your children. I have been a sahm for 9 years and it took me a long time to realise I was equally as important as my children (we sahm are entitled to have wants too)

IMHO you have put your children at the top of your priority list and seem to be a very caring and involved parent. I see that all you are looking to do is spend some of your time on yourself which I believe everyone should do!!

Take a step back - have a look at the big picture and see if there is something you are missing that may point towards a solution. Please dont feel you should give up- no matter what age you are you are entitled to do things that make you happy too ( ok it's causing a bit of stress atm but once you have a solution you will enjoy the work) It can be done- It just sometimes takes a bit of "thinking outside the box" I find doing a bit of brainstorming ona peice of paper and writing all the solutions I can think of ( even the ridiculous) can help. Sometime the answer is there it just takes a while to see it. This is important to you- you will find a way:)

Keeping_Motivated

immoral_angeluk wrote: »

I want to go back to work. I've always been a very independant person and to be fair staying at home all day every day is driving me insane. I love my girls but I just can't cut it as a stay at home mum and I've got full respect for anyone who can.

The CAB WAS my hopes and dreams for the future.

Thats very honest IA and I admire that.

Have you looked at childminders are they any cheaper so that you may be able to fund it during the time you don't get the free place?

Keeping_Motivated

Or have you spoken to anyone at Surestart to see if they have information that you have not yet sourced yourself. If you tell them your needs they may have some solutions for you? Worth a try?

chappers

Is it just the six weeks of the school holidays that are causing the problem, you say that some months you can afford the childcare, hopefully between now and then you will have the money to pay for some of it, could your OH not take a few odd days off to cover you for a couple of the weeks, could some other family member not lend you the money and you pay them back in the months when you can afford it and the kids are in nursery, could parents or such like not come stay for a week and look after the children.
I'm sure if you really want to do this you will find a way.

devonsdreamer

would CAB be more flexable about the hours you work during teh holidays so you dont have to use the childcare as much?

barnaby-bear

floss2 wrote: »

I-A has been trying to find a part-time job....ANY part-time job...but has had very little luck with the number of jobs available in her area. The voluntary work is not inconvenient hours, it's daytime training, and I-A has suddenly found out that the nursery's funding for her elder daughter is not what she'd been told by the nursery.

It's training that could lead to a career she REALLY wants to do with a good salary that'll mean she will not have to work all hours in cr&p unfulfilling dead end jobs.

She's proposing to put her kids in for two halfdays a week not full time, traditionally kids were in large families with the elder daughters looking after god knows how many kids - so you could argue it's social and traditional from that point of view - besides they need to get some immunity and germs from somewhere. Many kids thrive in nurserys (have you met home schooled kids? Mostly freaks but their parents would argue their way is best). I went to full-time school (it was supposed to be half days but I started refusing to go home) at 3 and loved it - loads of other kids and people to ask "why" repeatedly. They used to sell drugs until 90 years ago to drug babbies so both parents could work - whilst we're on victorian nostalgia.

It's not exactly a traditional family model to be reliant on state benefits and you can tell she hates it and really wants to be in a different situation.

Her kids get to see you can change things and achieve things through bl^&dy hard work - I think the benefits of that should be considered. Plus if she's happier doing the training they'll benefit.

( I heard a couple of women !!!!!ing outside Tescos about women who worked - whilst dragging on fags - recently).

immoral_angeluk

chappers wrote: »

Is it just the six weeks of the school holidays that are causing the problem, you say that some months you can afford the childcare, hopefully between now and then you will have the money to pay for some of it, could your OH not take a few odd days off to cover you for a couple of the weeks, could some other family member not lend you the money and you pay them back in the months when you can afford it and the kids are in nursery, could parents or such like not come stay for a week and look after the children.
I'm sure if you really want to do this you will find a way.

ste holidays - he can have holiday off but he's already had to have loads off for other child related things.. not sure he's got much left.
Parents - my dad isn't worth mentioning. My mum passed away in 2005
ste's parents - his dad lives miles away and has just had a bypass.. his mum works all the hours under the sun.
ste's sister works at the same place he does but finds it harder to get time off.
No other family who could have them.

barnaby-bear

devonsdreamer wrote: »

would CAB be more flexable about the hours you work during teh holidays so you dont have to use the childcare as much?

Maybe one session a week just for the six weeks - people there probably have holidays and childcare issues with the hols too, so they maybe a bit pressed to fit training in too....