WHY can't anything ever go RIGHT???

rayday2

Just seen spuds reply and countless like it, we too have no one to look after our children for either work or socially. Actually I am quite proud to say we have managed to arrange child care between the two of us and not have to utilise childminders etc

Not that there is anything wrong with them but I know none would match up to what I want or demand. Actually even if family were local again they are not good enough for my girls.

Modern family structure now means we move away from our roots or our parents are working longer themselves so we kinda have to find our own way!

At 22 the world is still at your feet, I had only had my first daughter then and now terrifyingly she is in comp an annoyingly (although she does not know it!) having the same ambitions I had.

You will be a CAB worker - but a better one for knowing the sacrifices famalies have to make.

immoral_angeluk

rayday2 wrote: »

Just seen spuds reply and countless like it, we too have no one to look after our children for either work or socially. Actually I am quite proud to say we have managed to arrange child care between the two of us and not have to utilise childminders etc

Not that there is anything wrong with them but I know none would match up to what I want or demand. Actually even if family were local again they are not good enough for my girls.

In all that time I have found part time jobs, from estate agents to special needs youth worker and time to be a school governor too. Everything is possible I just feel that you have an idea what you want and because you want it now you are not seeing that it is entirely possible but later! If it was one of your children wanting something I am sure you would teach them patience - so take a leaf out your own book and have some lol!

I have had patience! I've been trying to sort this out for ages but something is always coming up and throwing a spanner in the works!

(Land_of)_Maz

immoral_angeluk wrote: »

Options...

Carry on with original plan and hope we find some way of affording it.
Give up CAB, and ann summers and be stay at home mum.
Give up CAB but carry on with ann summers and hope they don't drop our tax credits too much.
Give up CAB, ann summers and get another *regular hours/income part time job* and have girls in nursery.


hmmmm. :think:

Don't forget you actually have a five hours a week job at Argoose too.....

My opinion - lose the OU thing for now (maybe you have already), you do not need the stress and i think CAB will provide a steep learning curve for now.

Go ahead with your plans and i guaruntee you will be able to afford the extra costs, bearing in mind that the tax credits are adjusted to average out for higher weeks and lower weeks. Ensure you have got your average costs of childcare figured out correctly for the tax credits peeps. No problem calling Argoose and ASummers 16 hours per week real work, volunteering aside.

View it as another bill which must be paid, and as i suggested earlier, if you don't clear Egg this month to meet the nursery costs, then it really isn't the end of the world. You'll clear it next time.

climbgirl

rayday2 wrote: »

There are more options but you are not prepared to consider them.

The main one people keep saying is wait a while till the children are in education and then go ahead with it. Whilst keeping an eye out for a part time job that can give you time away from the children some "grown up" time.

So you don't have to give up you just should wait!

Rayday is right, there are more options here, you're just not seeing them right now because you're annoyed and frustrated (which is fair enough!). You just need to try and forget the frustration for a bit and look at the other options objectively.

There are two suggestions that people have made that you haven't really discounted - I think you should think about these (objectively if you can!) and outline (legitimate) reasons why they might not work.

The first one is waiting until September. Yes, it's frustrating to delay something that you desperately want to do. But it's only six months, that's no time at all! What are the practical reasons why this option wouldn't work?

The second suggestion you haven't really considered in full is starting now and dropping the overpayments on your credit card to cover the childcare costs. Ok, so you'll be paying off your card for a bit longer. But if that's what you choose to get going right now on something that is so important to you, then so be it. You're not increasing the debt, just taking a little longer to pay it back. And frankly, you've worked so damn hard to get it down in the last few years, nobody would berate you for choosing that.

It's a frustrating situation, but like everyone has said, that's life and it's how you deal with it that counts! You've done the stamping your feet bit (which is very therapeutic, I know!) - now sit down and rationally work out a way forward.

(Land_of)_Maz

climbgirl wrote: »

The second suggestion you haven't really considered in full is starting now and dropping the overpayments on your credit card to cover the childcare costs. Ok, so you'll be paying off your card for a bit longer. But if that's what you choose to get going right now on something that is so important to you, then so be it. You're not increasing the debt, just taking a little longer to pay it back. And frankly, you've worked so damn hard to get it down in the last few years, nobody would berate you for choosing that.

.

That's kinda what i was trying to say Climbgirl, you put it better than me!

immoral_angeluk

climbgirl wrote: »

Rayday is right, there are more options here, you're just not seeing them right now because you're annoyed and frustrated (which is fair enough!). You just need to try and forget the frustration for a bit and look at the other options objectively.

There are two suggestions that people have made that you haven't really discounted - I think you should think about these (objectively if you can!) and outline (legitimate) reasons why they might not work.

The first one is waiting until September. Yes, it's frustrating to delay something that you desperately want to do. But it's only six months, that's no time at all! What are the practical reasons why this option wouldn't work?

The second suggestion you haven't really considered in full is starting now and dropping the overpayments on your credit card to cover the childcare costs. Ok, so you'll be paying off your card for a bit longer. But if that's what you choose to get going right now on something that is so important to you, then so be it. You're not increasing the debt, just taking a little longer to pay it back. And frankly, you've worked so damn hard to get it down in the last few years, nobody would berate you for choosing that.

It's a frustrating situation, but like everyone has said, that's life and it's how you deal with it that counts! You've done the stamping your feet bit (which is very therapeutic, I know!) - now sit down and rationally work out a way forward.

I'm not discounting them at all.. like I said those were the options as I saw them for right now... not giving up entirely.. just for the time being until the situation improves.
As for the stopping overpayments to for childcare. We literally have nothing else. Yes we use all our spare money to pay off the card but if that's used for childcare we would literally have no spare money whatsoever...

(Land_of)_Maz

How much are the fees again each month, and how much extra will your award be (compared to normal award without childcare element)

i.e of the £300 (as a figure) how much do you get paid by tax credits to cover it?

Don't include normal award as you live of that week to week........ only what extra you are given to pay childcare (should be 80% right?)

If it's going to cost you more money than you can afford to pay your share of the childcare then maybe now is not the time.

But why is this only came to light as a problem today hun?

Please check you have averaged out the costs correctly and your award is right, it shouldn't be too much of a shortfall...........

immoral_angeluk

It's only come to light today because I had a letter from them saying the funding for Ashli now doesn't start til the 21st April.. and that it only runs til the 21st July. I'd forgotten the half terms and summer holidays aren't funded so we'd have to pay full fees.
We'd get the full 80% help but I need to reassess the weekly amount because of the holidays etc.

rayday2

But September is a different story it is officially the longest of all the school terms so why not wait!

chappers

immoral_angeluk wrote: »

I'm not discounting them at all.. like I said those were the options as I saw them for right now... not giving up entirely.. just for the time being until the situation improves.
As for the stopping overpayments to for childcare. We literally have nothing else. Yes we use all our spare money to pay off the card but if that's used for childcare we would literally have no spare money whatsoever...

But surely as a short term stop gap during the holidays its the answer to the problem, there was never any talk about generating extra money just about paying for childcare and surely the money you are throwing at your debts could wait for acouple of months until the nippers are back at school in term time.
Sometimes one thing has to give to achieve another and personally speaking I would say your CAB training is far more important than paying your debts off for 6 weeks.