Worn out.

phoenixchick

Sorry to hear that things are tough at the moment. Hopefully your Monday Dr's appointment will be more helpful. I finally went to the Dr on this Monday, as I had been feeling very down - we had a really good chat and, although there are still a lot of issues, it did make me feel much better.

You have been really brave dealing with all the DCAs and finances yourself. Can you tell husband how you are feeling? It could be that he is feeling jealous of the fact that you have a virtual life which doesn't include him.

Look after yourself :grouphug:

boredofbeingathome

louisemarie wrote: »

Well today is not shaping up too well. Went to see GP (which wasn't easy to be honest) only to find when I got there she was not able to attend as her son was poorly(Not a problem her children SHOULD come first please dont think I am moaning) anywya I saw the locum who wasn't listening at all(I DID try) he was talking about my IBS and said that it was understandable to "be a bit low" (I have IBS -severe but under control - was hospitalised a couple of years ago when they suspected something nasty) So no progress. However the receptionist has offered me an appointment(we normally have to ring after 4pm or on the day we need an appointment) for Monday when she will be back.
Have just had a text from Husband saying he is comming back shortly(he has been for a walk) so I willl answer some points now and the rest later. boredofbeingathome. Yes it seems he has permently quit his job. Yes he COULD get leave but he hasn't done that.
HHH no not ex army he is(or was an accedimic)
am getting jittery so will post later. Suffice to say he KNOWS that I come on here. He says things like going to play with your saddo mates again? There was a bit of a problem last night(will explain later)re being on here. Mind you he didn't think it was sad when I got over 2grand of his bank charges refunded though. He also thinks I am pathetic for having a "nerd number", going to "parties", trying to get to meets and considering folks on here friends. Am sat typing this twisted round so that I can look out of the window so I know when he gets back. Thank you for all your support. I will answer everyone when I can and am trying to sort things out. Again thank you all so very much.

You poor love, its not easy is it? It says something about his state of mind if he is doing all this to you-which reminds me must look and see if i have a nerd number. I totally agree that men are quite happy to let women claim charges back etc, (sorry any guys out there who are also doing this stirling job and also to Martin- the founding father) My husband says, it is because i am so good at organising:mad: This from a man who runs a busy office and finances for said office. We went to a works do recently and he was crowing about ppi insurance he had claimed back- And sagely giving his assistant manager advice on how to do it, -if only he had actually done it:cool:
He does sound a bit controlling as you seem to be in knots about him, could he go to GP with you on monday to see about anti depressants, as i may be missing the point here- but he seems to be the one with the problem, not you.
Good luck over weekend and as sad as we all are, sometimes we just need a bit of comfort in a rotten world and talking on here is great therapy- two titles nicked from great threads:D signing off as a virtual friend- Bobxxxxxx:wave:

boredofbeingathome

jinky67 wrote: »

A lot of what you have said could also be true for me.
I also get the stupid comments about parties and saddo mates.
I have decided I will just ignore him.
:grouphug: have a dodgy hug on me
xxx

couldn't agree more:D

jinky67

slighty off topic but I have noticed a lot of threads on here in the past week or so about men and their attitudes to either us or money....my mystery one included.;)
Is it just the time of year?

blue_monkey_2

Hi OP,

I wanted to just a little bit in if I may. I think my husband feels the same, tuts and sighs when I am on here all the time. I consider the people I have met, who have helped me through my problems, my friends. 'Friends' are people ho take the time out of their day to help you with yours and make you feel better, I have (real) people I see as friends who don't do either and I personally know what I would prefer.

I think maybe your husband is a little jealous that you are spending time onthe PC and not with him. Maybe you could come to an agreement where you could have a couple of hours per night while he watches something on TV he wants to watch thn you'll turn the PC off. Just while he is feeling like this.

I think you'll find most men are the same, my husband 'lets' me do everything, if I do not do it then it will not get done. I nagged him to send his tax return in for work tools, they hve replied saying they want copies of stuff and has he done them, no, it is there waiting for me to do - I am too busy so it is not getting done. He moans he has no money, food, and that x needs paying yet it is all left for me to do.... so you are not entitley on your own as anoher poster has said (by the way bored, if that had been me I would have been giving them advice as well so it was clear WHO had made the return) anyway, I just wanted to offer a few hugs really. I don't really have anything else to offer as we have a ton of stuff going on as well (Oh yes, that would be me who has a ton of stuff while hubby sits on his backside and moans about it!!).

It is going to be hard but you need to pull together and work out where you go from here, ask him if he would prefer you having virtual friends to rela one you want to go see/talk to every night and then he might change his mind!! I think that he is jealous and you need to make sure he is not. Good luck for the future, I hope your appointment goes well and you can speak to the other doctor better on Monday.

jinky67

what would happen to the world if women stopped doing these things?:rotfl:

blue_monkey_2

jinky.... maybe it is 'spring fever' and realising that we have to clear the deadweight/don;t pull their weight 'clutter' from our lives.... LOL.....

I don't think ALL men are like this but I think A LOT are as they get so used to us mothering them. It is all our own faults you see. My husband even blames me for losing contact with HIS friends when last time I looked he had full use of his arms, hands and fingers to lift the phone and make a call to them!! It is soooo much easier blame/let someone else do it after all. And blame then when it does not go right!!

Oh, and I won't into the issues of using the last of the food so when I come to get the kids their lunch the next day I have no bread/cheese/ham........ maybe we are wired to be more considerate, I would never dream of eating the last bit of cheese as my son loves it and has it for lunch everyday. Maybe I am too soft and in 20 years time it will be him eating the last of the cheese..... rod for my own back maybe, LOL!!

jinky67

blue_monkey wrote: »

jinky.... maybe it is 'spring fever' and realising that we have to clear the deadweight/don;t pull their weight 'clutter' from our lives.... LOL.....

I don't think ALL men are like this but I think A LOT are as they get so used to us mothering them. It is all our own faults you see. My husband even blames me for losing contact with HIS friends when last time I looked he had full use of his arms, hands and fingers to lift the phone and make a call to them!! It is soooo much easier blame/let someone else do it after all. And blame then when it does not go right!!

Oh, and I won't into the issues of using the last of the food so when I come to get the kids their lunch the next day I have no bread/cheese/ham........ maybe we are wired to be more considerate, I would never dream of eating the last bit of cheese as my son loves it and has it for lunch everyday. Maybe I am too soft and in 20 years time it will be him eating the last of the cheese..... rod for my own back maybe, LOL!!

I may soon be decluttering my life:rolleyes:
I know what you mean OH used DD pizzas the other day and didnt tell me...is it difficult to say we have run out of something?

blue_monkey_2

jinky67 wrote: »

what would happen to the world if women stopped doing these things?:rotfl:

It would be full of mean wandering around, naked, starving, having been evicted as there was no rent paid/electic paid/food in the cupboards!! Maybe all women should have a 'mass strike' just for experimental/entertainment purposes and see who is left standing at the end of the fortnight!!

Always makes me think of that joke where the man comes in from work and wonders what is going on, it looks like that they have been burgled. There are plates, cups, toys, paper and clothing all over the floor, water running, cushions off the sofa, washing up bowl full, kids, cats and dogs fighting and pulling each others clothes/hair, beds unmade, fridge open, milk on the side, cearal all over the floor.... the husband says 'good grief, what happened around here?' the wife said 'when you asked me what I do all day, well today I didn't do it'. LOL!! How very true!!

blue_monkey_2

jinky67 wrote: »

I may soon be decluttering my life:rolleyes:
I know what you mean OH used DD pizzas the other day and didnt tell me...is it difficult to say we have run out of something?

It's not run out at all silly, it's just not there for them next time. It's like this 'did you get my rolls/coffee/ham?' Me: 'did you ask me to?'. Him: 'no' Me: 'then no, I can't read minds!!'

You have to wonder. I have to confess it is the one thing that iritates the life out of me, using the last of the food and not telling me and I'll say to the kids 'what do you ant' and they'll say XX and then there is nothing left as hubby has eaten it - I'll then have to putup with a 10 minute tantrum from the kids while trying to convince then they can eat something else and an alternative s acceptable.

if I see him using the last of something and not leaving enough I can feel my temper rising and I have to say to myself 'walk away, walk away, walk away. Go to the shops first thing' (we have 10 minute drive to the shops so his is probably why it irritates me more I guess). LOL, maybe I am just going insane though which would explain a lot of things!!!!