How much money to give as wedding gift?

Rage_in_Eden

I agree i think it's cheeky to ask for money - how about a nice bottle of sparkling wine? we had a few of these for our gifts and it's really nice to drink them later on and remember the day - i continue to be amazed at the cheek of people though.....

Jet

Poppy9 wrote:

Tell him that you wouldn't want to insult him with a token cash amount but would baby sit or have his son for a sleepover 1 night so he and his new wife can go out for a meal to celebrate their wedding or even offer to mind him on house moving day.

I would offer to do this but they have family who already babysit 5 full days per week while they both work and also on Saturday when they want a day to themselves! They are the sort of people who wouldn't leave their son with anyone but family (lucky them!).

Still not sure what to do. My principles say that asking for money is not correct, so I shouldn't give it. But I suppose I don't want to be the odd one out by giving a gift or gift vouchers. My boss is very arty (it's part of his job), so making something wouldn't be upto his standard anyway as I'm nowhere near as arty as him. :rolleyes:

At the end of the day it is free food and entertainment for a day, so maybe I should just go ahead and bung 30 quid in their card, but it just seems so wrong to me especially as I know the money will just be squandered!

summerday

Hi Jet,

it is a difficult dilemma, it seems like more and more people are asking for money as a wedding present, it's not so bad when there's a box at the venue where guests can make an anonymous donation but I have seen invitations where it says pls can gifts be money to be put into a joint savings account with no mention of a box so I'm not sure if we're expected to put a cheque or cash in their wedding card- either way if they know exactly what you've given I don't really like the thought as it's so difficult to decide how much to give.
I think when I get married to save all this stress I'm just gonna insist I don't want any gifts, money or anything I just want to enjoy the company of all my guests!

Gingham_Ribbon

Jet wrote:

I would offer to do this but they have family who already babysit 5 full days per week while they both work and also on Saturday when they want a day to themselves! They are the sort of people who wouldn't leave their son with anyone but family (lucky them!).
!

No way they'd appreciate some kind of gift for their son that they could all use together then? (Like a game, or cinema tickets?)

Tough one. I hate it when people do this! It's so selfish. I hope you have a nice time anyway!

Lyndsay_21

I'm in the same dilemma going to a cousins wedding (the only cousin thats ever invited me to one of there weddings) and am a bit strapped and was going to give a voucher wasn't sure if £15 was too stingy?

beadysam

How about a lottery ticket - they may end up with loads a money!!!!!

JanCee

Buy them a bottle of champagne. You can get a decent bottle for less than £30 and it is an ideal celebratory gift for a wedding dressed up with ribbons and fancy wrapping.

Jacster_2

Jet wrote:

At the end of the day it is free food and entertainment for a day, so maybe I should just go ahead and bung 30 quid in their card, but it just seems so wrong to me especially as I know the money will just be squandered!

If this is what you decide to do, £30 is more than enough. I'd be delighted with £30. It's a lovely gift.

Still think it's awful you've been put in this situation.

I take it there's no work collection where you could shove a fiver in an envelope and noone would be any the wiser?

katglasgow

Sorry but I had to join in, I think £30 is too much for a boss (who earns more than you) for an evening invite!
I got married 2 weeks ago. We didnt mention presents at all in our invitations (wasnt comfortable with this) and so guests that wanted to ask either us, or one of our parents. We asked to donations towards our honeymoon or doing up our kitchen (and gave a few names for gift vouchers) and a small list of objects we would appreciate. Most of our friends and close family were happy to give us cash or vouchers, but we found that more distant relatives chose something else anyway and we had a varied selection of beautiful gifts which we really enjoyed opening. Different people spent different amounts according to how much they had and what sort of person they are and this was fine, we understood this.
A tenner in a collection from work should be quite sufficient, but if not why not go for a really nice sparkling wine? I agree with the post below, it looks lovely all wrapped up with a sparkly ribbon, we really enujoyed having lovely gifts to unwrap!

Loadsabob

How about Oxfam Unwrapped? Only one example of a number of organisations offering this kind of service, where the recipent of a gift gets a card telling them what you have paid for in their name.

For a wedding, considering this couple have a child, you can give 100 school dinners for £6!!! How about 300 school dinners? Or how about something like the planting of 50 trees, (to mark the start of their married life). Cost to you, £16, giving you the knowledge that your money has done something positive. They can't object to the concept, and you can add something to the card like "As there was nothing you needed, I wanted to commemorate your special day with a gift that would make a difference to difficult lives". You can give a goat for £24 - the most unusual wedding gift they'd receive, surely!

I have friends getting married in May, and they've lived together and have everything they need. They're stating no gifts, but if people want to bring a bottle to the evening celebration (barbecue and bonfire with band in marquee) that would be appreciated. I thought that was lovely.