I wanna be mortgage free!

mummyofonechild

twinklie wrote: »

Oh I don't know if I've posted about the details of it all before. It happened in 2005. It's what stopped me going back to live in the US again. Mum got my credit card and maxed it out without telling me. Because I had to pay that off I couldn't afford to go back and had to stay here. It was wanting to get out of my parents house etc that pushed me into finding a "career" which is when I thought about teaching.

It was a horrible time but a lot of good came out of it...I met DH for instance. Still, since all that I kinda feel like I'm on my own family wise (with the exception of DH etc). Thats why it wouldn't cause me any problems to move abroad. The further away I am the better in a weird way.

How Awful

Big Hugs from me

twinklie

Bah...like they always say. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger!!

Although I could do with the 5K they still owe me right now so I can get the cards paid off and get out of my overdraft!!

[Deleted User]

twinklie
sorry to hear of the stuff that has gone on with your mum, that must be really difficult... seems a few of us on here have less than *ahem* "perfect" parents/upbringings.... makes me wonder for me anyway whether there is something in that in pushing me to secure my "adult" family home as much as possible....you can choose your friends but not your family huh?

anyway- got sidetracked there! glad you are hopefully on the mend now and belle is getting out and about too! I probably missed this but how much longer are you and DH apart for (am I right he is studying at the moment?) hope the back to school isnt too harsh and you can rest and get totally better beforehand!

twinklie

For another 2 years come November! Doh! Rubbish.

I think I'll be back to the doctors on Tuesday because so far I still sound like I have a 40 a day smoking habit! :rotfl: But between now and then I have very little on apart from a spot of lesson planning. Yawn.

As for my family...thats only the half of it. My tail is one of drug addicts, prostitutes and acquiring someone elses baby at 16 to raise without ever knowing how it actually happened. Still, I've ended up relatively well adjusted according to my DH and I have a decent job...so something went right somewhere.

mummyofonechild

Do you think it has made us stronger though. Mine is an alcoholic parent who also gambled. It certainly made me save up for the deposit on my first flat to leave home, and look where we all are now

[Deleted User]

aw twinklie thats a shame about DH , how long does it take you to get there or does he come home at weekends etc?
re: families I hear you on complicated stories like the one you have described (minus the baby in my case tho but plus a few other complications!) ... I tend to shy away from the "Oh I remember when I was young" conversations with people as I sound like I have just picked something out of a particulalry depressing eastenders plot!
as you say though, something must have gone right! you should be rightly proud of yourself!

twinklie

I think it's made me stronger. My DH has an alcoholic mother who has many an issue attached too her. Now that one has given HIM issues and insecurities...but mine seems to have done me good. I think. I'll have a breakdown in a couple of years now watch and it'll all come tumbling out. :rotfl:

twinklie

Deleted_User wrote: »

aw twinklie thats a shame about DH , how long does it take you to get there or does he come home at weekends etc?
re: families I hear you on complicated stories like the one you have described (minus the baby in my case tho but plus a few other complications!) ... I tend to shy away from the "Oh I remember when I was young" conversations with people as I sound like I have just picked something out of a particulalry depressing eastenders plot!

OMG...totally. Nobody ever believed me when I was younger so I stopped saying anything about my background as well. I never join in...just make the right noises....

It takes on average 2 - 2 and a half hours. We take it in turns to see each other but he'll be doing most of the travelling for now because Belle needs a bit of a routine at the minute. She's teething and getting a little silly when we break her routine. Plus then her puppy class is going to start in October on a Friday evening for 8 weeks. Then we'll start going back down there again probably. At holidays we go down to DH as well.

[Deleted User]

hey twinklie
good you guys take it in turns, must be difficult being apart- I guess with teaching at least you get long-ish holidays (that isnt a jibe about teachers doing no work btw!! my friends who are teachers put an end to any idea I had of that!)

yeah I get you re: the conversations- I used to join in quite brazenly when I was younger until I realised what a conversation stopper my input usually was! ......(sometimes I was naughty just because I knew it would freak people out!- am much more grown up now I am glad to say!) marvelous to have turned out so good I say ...not at all obsessive with money ..no OCD tendencies or perfectionist tendencies when it comes to achieving goals...well rounded and well adjusted....well I am anyway! :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

seriously tho I think in many ways it has made me pretty determined and savvy with money amongst other things (having had to pretty much fend for myself at a very young age) so I am grateful for that ...

twinklie

Sounds like we have a fair bit in common. I do however have a certain amount of control issues...but that works out well in our relationship. It's over stupid stuff like booking holidays, I have to do it or double check whatever DH does (the one time I let him do it he booked his own flight in the wrong name!!!). The banking and paying bills, I have to do or I have to double check what DH does...and so on. He is admittedly rubbish at it though and when he did it all for himself he just messed it up constantly...so he's really pleased that I want to do it. He finds it dull whereas I enjoy it!

I have done the exact same thing. Dropped a little bombshell about my life just to see someones reaction. It can be very funny but it's been a long time since I did it. Trying to explain it all to DH was pretty amusing. Don't think he believed me about it all initially. Still, he knows most of it now...anything he doesn't know is because I've forgotten or it's just not come up.

As far as I'm concerned the past is the past and I'm thankful for it or I wouldn't be who I am now. However, I don't particularly want to dwell on it. My lessons have been learnt (somewhat unfairly at times) and I'm going to move forward...onwards and upwards and all that!