The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

mollypolly

Hello and welcome JWBF.
I totally agree with you about this awful habit of drinking every night. My DH and I were just the same as you and he doesnt think it is a problem either, so I am going it alone at the moment although he does seem to be cutting down a little.
Have a read through this thread as there are some great tips for giving up/cutting down.I am on day 6 today (albeit for the second time as we had a holiday last week and I caved in) but I feel much better again already.
Good luck with however you decide to tackle your situation.
Love Mollypolly xxxx

yellowmonkey

Welcome JWBF and all the best.

ym

elantan

In_Search_Of_Me wrote: »

BB good youre feeling better! For those at "rock bottom" whether lurking or posting, PLEASE get help...you dont have to do this alone so dont but you do first have to acknowledge that there IS a problem and I think reading this thread just goes to show how widespread drinking to excess is! I do accept that not everyone who drinks too much is an alcohoic & am interested to know what others would define as the fine line? For me it would be that to be an alcoholic you feel you NEED the drink to function in everyday life & dont feel you can cope without it...What do others think? quote]



i have to admit i have thought about this an awful lot i personally define an alcoholic as someone who has an addiction to alcohol ie: they cant go the rest of their life without a drink ...i know people that can go a week without drinking they will get sugar cravings and headaches but they will manage and succeed ...however they are unable to go the rest of their life without it and eventally will succumb ...i know when my husband said to me that our marriage meant more to him than alcohol he meant it ...he meant it with every fibre of his being ...i know when he told me he wouldnt drink again he meant it...i also know that within a week it got too hard for him and he was back on the drink hating himself and feeling disgusted in the process that was when i realised my husband isnt just a heavy drinker my husband is an alcoholic ....i am now facing up to the reality that i might be the same i have always drank to keep him company to be social etc i always thought that if i wanted to i could give it up like that and have done several times for over a year or more ...but now i am wondering how long can i go what is it that makes me want to have a drink? i cant always blame my husband it is my responsibility after all it's not like he ties me up and pours it down my throat ...i am aware though that everyone has their own deffinition of what an alcoholic is and i apologise if i have offended anyone it was not my intent. but i felt i should respond to the question

ltm07

ltm07 wrote: »

I think you've hit the nail on the head there ISOM about not enjoying alcohol as time goes on. Only been drunk about 3 times since Xmas & it is great to wake up on a Sunday morning & not have a hangover! Don't really know what to do about next week. One of my mate's birthdays & would like to catch up with him & a few other friend's who will be out. I will have £40 set aside should I go out but it will be an all day session! OH says it will do me good to go out & catch up with friends but I KNOW that i will end up getting hammered!! Going to spend the next week pondering what to do. I will enjoy the day if I go out but it's the after effects!!

Well I stuck to my guns & never went out,even though my Brother tried to talk me into it earlier in the week! Got around to mowing the lawns for the first time this year. Took OH & I about an hour mowing & raking as the grass was so long! Before LBM we were paying next door neighbour's brother,who has his own gardening business,£6 a fortnight to mow them! How lazy is that:o ?! Bought a £30 mower from Asda last year & have mowed it 7 or 8 times,so that's saved us over £40 already:rolleyes::D ! I reckon i'll get a call in a bit from Brother & mates who will be half p!ssed trying to get me out. But OH is cooking us steak,chips,mushrooms & onion rings with a nice bottle of red wine so there's no way I'm missing out on that:D ! I will still end up having some wine & 2 or 3 cans of lager,but will not feel like !!!!!! in the morning as I would do if I was out with mates & will be £40 better off too!! Hope everyone else is ok. All the best!

Little_Chicken

Succumbed to a binge last night:mad: Knew I would. 1.5 bottles of wine and a cocktail. hmmmph! At least I behaved myself though. Felt rough this morning - but served me right:rolleyes: Hope the rest of you have been better.

ltm07

mollypolly wrote: »

Hello and welcome JWBF.
I totally agree with you about this awful habit of drinking every night. My DH and I were just the same as you and he doesnt think it is a problem either, so I am going it alone at the moment although he does seem to be cutting down a little.
Have a read through this thread as there are some great tips for giving up/cutting down.I am on day 6 today (albeit for the second time as we had a holiday last week and I caved in) but I feel much better again already.
Good luck with however you decide to tackle your situation.
Love Mollypolly xxxx

OH & I are similar as to we do drink more or less every night. At he beginning of last year we stopped drinking during the week & managed it for a couple of months,but finally succumbed! The trouble is now that she works regular nights & alot of weekends so she likes a drink during the week & I usually join her. To be fair though we have both cut down big time & feel better for it!

ltm07

justwanabefree wrote: »

Hi all
I would very much like to join this "support group" if you will have me. I have known for a long time that both my hubby and I have a very bad drink habit and I want to seriously cut down although I can't get him to see it as such a problem. We both quit smoking many years ago but the drinking increased.
At it's worst we would have 2 or 3 gin & tonics before we eat then start on the wine, consuming 3 bottles of wine between us every night. :eek:
Over the last couple of months I have managed to cut out one of those bottles each night but it is still a horrendous habit. I can only speak for myself but the feeling of lethargy is the worst thing when I get up in the morning as I don't suffer hangovers. Maybe if I did it would be easier to cut down. I have very little will power so find it hard to seriously cut down when hubby won't.
We have been through and are going through very hard times just like the rest of you and I feel that alcohol has become a crutch for us to use.
I keep suggesting that we could afford to go out for meals or go away for weekends if we cut down but I can't get him to address the problem with me. I am hoping that by "coming out" I will find the strength from you guys to go it alone and just drag him with me albeit kicking & screaming.

jwbf - of drink & debt:o

I too have suggested to OH that if we cut out alcohol altogether in the house that we could go away for weekends &have more meals out etc., after all we are still spending around £50 a month on alcohol. But she does like a drink & so do I,so I don't think we could sustain it for long going without alcohol. It isn't a major issue that we could do more things if we gave up the booze,but I would definately give it a go if she would,but she won't. It is hard to get the right balance, as we can't afford to go out alot,so a couple of drinks at home is really one of the few pleasures we get. All this will change once we have a bit more cash as we will be able to go out & do more things that don't involve alcohol like going to the cinema & tenpin bowling etc more often.

Cornishpixie_2

Hi, Not done so well this weekend. I had a bottle of wine thursday night,and that was suposed to be that. Then got txt from a gd friend who lives 50 miles away so don't see her often,she stays at her mother's when she visits family. Asks if I want to catch up with a few drinks, so took a bottle of wine(she drinks beer) last night. So hubby who says he was going to try and give up with me, then has a drink thurs and friday. Today I met her and her cousin at beach cafe with all the kids. Was going to get myself a coffee, but she comes to the bar and says get me a pint same as you(that's what I drink when out with her). So we end up sitting outside of cafe had 3 pints. Got home hubby who was kid free all day, painted door and got more beer.:eek: I did go to take another beer, but got this Hey that's mine look, he then said I thought you had given up? so I put it back. But a guess that's a plus and friend and cousin supposed to be going out tonight but I declined. Bit mad at myself for having no will power.:mad: Not sure casualty the same with a fizzy water, but determined not to drink his beer.And too tight to go buy more wine from Mr T:rotfl:

singlemum_4

Hi Guys have been following this thread and realise that I to massivly reduce my alcohol consumption for many reasons. Its having a terrible affect on my relationship with my teenage daughter who constanly goes on about my drinking, the thing is she's right I do drink too much I just don't want to hear it all the time!! So the soloution must be to try and give up so we can get back onto a better footing and I can become a better role model. Also financially Im in the S**T so can only help there as well. Not to mention what it could be doing to my health!!!So can I please join you all????

nearly-there_4

D'oh wrote a huge amount yesterday evening and when I tried to post it, the computer crashed and it all went up in smoke !! Rather bothersome isn't it when that happens. Anyway, I've had a good nights sleep and ready to try again...................here goes !!

Elantan Sooooooooooooo glad to hear from you.........welcome. It was good to read your post...............and no! you won't be offending anyone..............I think you've made some useful comments. If this is the first time you've admitted that you have a problem with alcohol then I take my hat off to you..................it's a big thing to admit to..........................but also quite liberating too, as it means you're probably wanting to do something about it. If you read back through the posts there are some links to websites which describe alcoholic dependency / addiction. It took me a week or so to pluck up courage to join in on this forum. I've been drinking between 2 - 5 bottle of wine per week over the past 15 years.................and it's steadily increased....................and no! I'm not enjoying it. I gave up for a month in January....................mental health improved considerably as did energy levels and found I got more done in work and at home. Then I was back to square 1....................until April when I joined in here....................I managed 10 days and then slipped over the edge and had one bottle. Didn't even enjoy it that much.....................should have poured the rest of the bottle down the sink after 2 glasses !! Lost the best part of an evening, fell asleep in the chair, woke up at 3am stiff and feeling lousy and couldn't get back to sleep.................the lousiness lasted the rest of the day and I didn't have the umph or the mental sharpness to perform well at work. I'm starting afresh and back on day 3...................and boy !! do I feel so much better for it. Keep posting Elantan.......................share your journey with us. :wave:

Cornish Pixie and Little Chicken So you succumbed like me. Thankgoodness there are only 24 hours in a day and we can start afresh. Gently, does it

Mollypolly, Basilcat and BHB Wow!! you are an inspiration. Keep posting your tips on how to overcome the temptations. Well done on your achievements :dance:

Itm07 Glad to hear that you are cutting down on the alcohol and saving some money to boot.......................that's a great achievement for you and your partner. :T

JWBF said 'I am hoping that by "coming out" I will find the strength from you guys to go it alone and just drag him with me albeit kicking & screaming.'
Good for you girl......................but do it for yourself first and foremost...............as it is hard enough to do that without keeping it going for the both of you. Let us know how you get on. :wave:

Yellowmonkey I challenge you to post on the forum each time you want to have a drink , during your time off work. I'm just wondering if you take 5 mins out to post then the craving may pass..................just a thought.

Have a lovely Sunday. I'm just about to stir and make a rhubarb crumble and pecan pie for a family Sunday lunch. Take care now !! :hello: