The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

eselt

Hi All

I have to agree with Bismark- I've got the same type of personality- basically I was born with no brakes as far as alcohol is concerned, if I start I get the taste for it, and if its in the house it pretty much 'sings' to me until I neck the lot. When I tried to cut down I gave myself lots of rules e.g. no drinking in the house alone, no drink in the house unless a friend comes round with some, no drinking before the kids have gone to bed, no drinking during the day, no spirits etc etc - I broke every rule eventually and had to admit that for me no drinking at all under any circumstances was the way ahead. I envy people who can cut down and get back to sensible limits but I'm all or nothing.

Winebox- you say you want to cut down to where you were 10 yrs ago- watch out for the 'creeping' nature of drink problems, it took me over 20 yrs to get myself into a state, 10 yrs ago I was a heavy social drinker too, but it just crept up on me, and the whole relationship with alcohol changed- basically I love the stuff/hate the stuff/miss it/miss the effect/miss the confidence it gave me-it was such a huge part of my life- but in the end I ended up a full blown alcoholic, and I still can't work out how that happened and the exact point I crossed the line.

Jo, Spam, mymate, beachbeth, cornish and everyone else, have a great weekend.

Jo-re: stomach probs- I managed to avoid these in the end by taking the Sennakot dual action (contipation and trapped wind) tablets or deflatine- if you start taking a couple of these on the first day you give up for a couple of days you shouldn't have the tummy probs. CPN from Addaction suggested this to me and it worked-might be worth a try if you are in too much agony- other symptoms sound like withdrawal to me I'm afraid.

eselt

Hi Bingowings

I didn't mean to be all gloom and doom- honest!!!

Have a good break!!!!!!

jesdan

First of all I'd like to say that I've only just discovered this thread and I'm so pleased (sorry) that there are other people like me!

What started out as a relaxing glass of wine after work has now turned into at least a bottle a night and I hate myself for it - i make everyone unhappy, almost lost my marriage and now realise I need to work this out. Not got much more to say except I will keep a close eye on this thread and see if I can get some inspiration to stop the drinking from it, and best of luck to everyone who is trying so hard xx

spam.jam

jesdan wrote: »

First of all I'd like to say that I've only just discovered this thread and I'm so pleased (sorry) that there are other people like me!

What started out as a relaxing glass of wine after work has now turned into at least a bottle a night and I hate myself for it - i make everyone unhappy, almost lost my marriage and now realise I need to work this out. Not got much more to say except I will keep a close eye on this thread and see if I can get some inspiration to stop the drinking from it, and best of luck to everyone who is trying so hard xx

Hello its nice to meet you. You have come to the right place I think everyone here is lovely. Its a massive step to admit something is wrong with your habits so you have already started to address the problem. Let us know how you get on, the folks on here are supportive you are not on your own

spam.jam

jo1972 wrote: »

This is a very important point and I don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but I think you already know it anyway. Once you've passed a point with alcohol it's nigh on impossible to go back, this is the thing that I'm stuggling with and this is why AA says 'one day at a time' cos to think of the rest of your life not drinking will probably stop you trying. Some people can, but I think it's safe to say that I can't, tried it and failed at it, so I know what I need to do.....it's just bluddy doing it :mad:

One day at a time is an achievement, as is every moment. We all need to live for the moment and be strong in that moment. I don't know if I will be drinking tomorrow but I'm not drinking right now and thats enough. You can do it, please have faith in yourself

warwickroadroad23

I am on the third Kronenbourg of the evening.

Don't spend much on alcohol really but now and again I like a drink. trouble is... when I drink I have a terrible urge to eat loads of food which is not good for the waistline

eselt

Hi Jesden and Warwick- welcome to the thread- and thanks so much to everyone on this thread, you are all great.

Had a brilliant day today- younger sister invited me to my nieces 4th birthday party, took the kids, had a great time- even though I was really nervous because I know all her friends know I've had a big drink problem- she hasn't invited me over for stuff like that for ages as I'd become such an embarrassment- anyway everything went really well, I proved to people I can be a human now I'm sober and the best thing was my 14 yr old gave me a great big hug when we got back and said, "mum I'm so proud of you for getting better"- and I got a massive kick of motivation- I know its going to take longer than 7 months to prove to people that I can change- but I'm more determined than ever now (although I did hear my other sister ask my kids on the phone, "did mum behave herself" -and I felt really angry because I had but I suppose I've let everyone down before and they just assume I will do it again). I just need to keep getting out there, sober, back to normal, doing normal mum stuff and earning back some respect and trust- I've just got this awful feeling that I'm going to be stuck with this bloody label for a long time yet....................

Best of luck to everyone, have a brilliant weekend. Cheers Jackie

Bismarck

Well...evening all...just checking in...as you may guess the Bismarck brain is usually rumbling along somewhere in the background...apart from the usual appreciation that I have, I would really hate to have to spend so much cash on booze...one of the knock-on effects of previous over-indulgence is that the Bismarck coffers are not overflowing...far from it in fact...

Some recent posts have pointed to money saving as being a good motivator for giving up/cutting down...

Well there is that...I gave up because I'd reached my stop on the train journey. It was time to get off...and there were no further stops before a crash.

I thank the heavens regularly that all is not lost and I can make amends...however getting off the journey at last was only a part of story. Getting off is one part of the puzzle.

Staying off means rebuilding everything and in a debt-free wannabee sense, the best person to fix the mess that has ensued is a repentant sober person who can pick the bricks of his foundation back up, clean the ones that are to be kept and put them back into place, maybe bring in some new bricks and get rid off the old ones that don't fit the new structure.

To sum up..being sober is like bringing in a new person to sort the mess and this person doesn't have expensive tastes in liquid refreshment. Before I stopped, I used to just want my other self to come in and take over - the strong guy who knew how to do stuff and was prepared to fight for the things that mattered...I alone just couldn't find the energy to break the cycle - I feared the aftermath - I knew the fix-it-me was out there somewhere but he just wasn't listening...yes...definitely another day to be thankful.

- well done eselt! I'd just finished my post when I saw you'd posted...just keep going in the right direction...the names that stick will change in time...the name and respect you have for yourself is the most important.

Bismarck

spam.jam wrote: »

I just went for a nice meal with my kiddies. I had a diet coke and drove us home, no worrries. It is hard to resist, especially when my youngest says 'Its ok mummy you can have a beer if you want' arrgh!! The old me would have had two pints before the food arrived, four more during the meal and told the kids we are walking home, and upon arriving home I would have probably either fallen asleep whilst kids looked after themselves or dragged them round to some friends house where I could drink myself into next week. Im so glad things are different

well done you!

Bismarck

jo1972 wrote: »

This is a very important point and I don't want to be the bearer of bad news, but I think you already know it anyway. Once you've passed a point with alcohol it's nigh on impossible to go back, this is the thing that I'm stuggling with and this is why AA says 'one day at a time' cos to think of the rest of your life not drinking will probably stop you trying. Some people can, but I think it's safe to say that I can't, tried it and failed at it, so I know what I need to do.....it's just bluddy doing it :mad:

your time will come, Jo.

I've tried to work out where I met and crossed my line and I'm not sure...I can't blame any specific events as triggers in themselves....it's just me I'm afraid and it's taken years of denial to finally admit it...I'm just glad I wasn't too late.