The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

nearly-there_4

jo1972 wrote: »

The book sounds very similar to the smoking none, I presume they work on the same lines anyway. Why is it everything that's addictive is bad for you!!!

Hi Jo
I've not read the smoking one.....................but it would make sense that Allen Carr that the same method for drinking. I bought 'The Easyway to Control Drinking' , but there are two or three other titles.
Few days ago, Bismarck mentioned a book that he's read: 'Stop drinking for life easily' by Jason Vale. It boasts a 85% success rate. It sounds similar to Allen Carr's book, but I wouldn't mind reading it. It's temporarily out of stock on amazon, but it's available on other sites.
I was sorry to hear that you'd lost your visa card................buggar, ain't it!! :mad:

jo1972

nearly-there wrote: »

I was sorry to hear that you'd lost your visa card................buggar, ain't it!! :mad:

It's my fault for complaining last week that they were paying us a week early, I fated it!

ZTD

jo1972 wrote: »

The book sounds very similar to the smoking one, I presume they work on the same lines anyway. Why is it everything that's addictive is bad for you!!!

It's the moderation thing. Everything you take too much of is bad for you, whether it be alcohol or any other drink.

mollypolly

Hi everyone.

Hope you are all having a good weekend.

Jo.The Allen Carr book that I read was a small one called "No More Hangovers"
It only took a couple of hours to read and does work on the same lines as the No smoking one...which my DH read and managed to pack in ciggies after 40 years.
Today is Day 49 for me.No Alcohol for Seven whole weeks.WOW!!!

DD and her OH came round last night with wine and curry, but they didnt try to encourage me to drink.I think they know I mean it this time..Well,I hope I do.:rolleyes:

Keep up the good work.Keep on trying to try;)

Love Mollypollyxxxx

barshamhillbilly

Evening All
Just popped in quick to say hi !

I have to own up to having a glass of wine with the missus yesterday. So 2 days down the pan since starting, though only a bottle of beer a a glass of wine in 59 days - so still damn good for my history!

By way of celebration of passing the £100 savings we bought the kids a little swimming pool for the patio. Pretty good really - just deep enough for them to swim in and big enough for me to play in too

Having said that, the kids went in yesterday and came out blue so I think it may be a couple of weeks before I jump in! ..... must get a heater me-thinks!

I feel much more in control now but still will have to keep telling myself to be very careful. It will only take a couple and I will be on that slippery slope again.

Any way - bear with me while I have a read through and a catch up.

Hope everyones having a great weekend.

BHB

jo1972

MP, I've read the little one, read it on the way home from work one night. I love AC cos it's such common sense! I want to read the big one now, gotta wait for the bank card to be delivered before I get it, unless I pass waterstones before hand. You are doing so fantastic, so glad you have a supportive family

BHB, you are such an inspiration hunny, how's OH doing?

xx

In_Search_Of_Me

moring all...careful there BHB - if you can stop at one thats fine but that there slope sure is slippery aint it!
Hope youre al surviving BH weekend! Always a toughie...quietish day for me today trying not to think of W**K!

Bismarck

ltm07 wrote: »

Next Saturday is the big test though, as it's my Cousin's stag day. I think the best way to deal with this is to not go in rounds with anyone so I can pace myself, although this will be difficult in itself as people are bound to buy each other drinks. It wouldn't be so bad if we were drinking in town, but we are going to another town 20 miles away,so no sneaking off when I've had enough:( .Just hope I'm in the right frame of mind to drink soft drinks when I've had enough. Really looking orward to the day out to be honest, but at the same time I hope I'm sensible enough to take it easy & not drink too much.

Good luck on the Stag day/night...I couldnt do it. I spent years cursing my mates who decided to not get married because they didn't have stag dos...Then one mate got married last summer on the quiet and I was glad he didn't have one.

I'm sure you know plenty about the calorific "value" of lager but the problem is that they are empty calories and stopping you getting to where you and your body really want to be.

good luck with the stag do!

Bismarck

nearly-there wrote: »

Bismarck wrote: »

part of me wishes I could just have the one and it be under control. I've no regrets, I can't do it and I'm asking for trouble if I try..it's just the way things are...
/quote]

But how can we control it? Alcohol is a drug...............it's addictive.
The difference between an alcoholic and a normal drinker is one of control............ a normal drinker can control his drinking and an alcoholic can't?

'The statement begs the question: what is 'normal drinking? (The AA) infers that it is drinking at such a level that you suffer no physical, mental, or social ill-effects. But how many 'normal' drinkers do you know who have never thrown up; or been drunk or hung-over; or been offensive or acted stupidly through drinking alcohol?...........and alcoholics can and do exercise control some of the time...............so 'normal drinkers' occasionally lose control and alcoholics do occasionally gain it .....................the difference is surely not in an inherent physical or mental defect but one of degree..................an alcoholic is at an advanced stage of the same disease' ie normal drinkers are already hooked. Allen Carr

Don't forget he says..............alcohol is a highly addictive drug................and we're brainwashed into taking it !! 90 per cent of the adult population drink alcohol.

Later on in the book he goes onto say that using willpower to give up drinking is not the solution. After all alcoholics are very strong willed.....................why else would you carry on drinking when you know what it does to you. Allen Carr states that we are brainwashed into thinking that the failure to give up drinking lies with the person themself, ie the lack of willpower, when in fact, it lies with the addictive nature of the drug and the brainwashing we've all undergone (don't underestimate the brainwashing)
The problem of controlling alcohol lies with the conflict of wills (the schizophrenia)...............one part of your brain is saying 'Please don't give in and take that drink' and the other part of the brain which craves the drink (the little monster -the addiction). is saying 'ive me a drink'.
Allen Carr explodes the myths of why we drink. He sets out to prove that we've been brainwashed to think that alcohol is a much needed pleasure and prop. He then systematically goes through the reasons we 'think' we drink and basically debunks the myths and 'unbrainwashes' you. You're left wondering why you ever fell for the drink in the first place. .......................and with that information you're free for the rest of your life.

I'm so glad I read the book - it really hit a nerve. I'm learning to stop blaming myself (what a weight that is off my shoulders) and hopefully ready to get on with enjoying my life.

ps It's sunny but very windy here..................and there's lots of housework to be done (yuck!)

Nationally, problem drinking is still not acknowledged to the point that it should be.

How many people lie when they come to fill in Health Questionnaires or talk to their doctor about their weekly intake?....I used to read Mens Health and do the odd questionnaire and be astonished that it had a slot for people to say that they drank 100 units per week...

That was beyond my comprehension at the time and I now know the question was a valid one.

As for AA definitions and badges....I don't see that calling myself anything would change matters. I just decide not to do something and my past is passed, simple as that. Calling myself anything doesn't change a thing.

Blaming yourself is pointless. Take the burden of guilt from you shoulders, leave it by the roadside and keep on going...each day without that baggage is a day further with the new you. If you need to, remember the day when you left the baggage behind and how good it felt to be free of it....and keep in your mind the picture of the baggage and all it represents, still there on the roadside.....unwanted luggage.:D

barshamhillbilly

In_Search_Of_Me wrote: »

moring all...careful there BHB - if you can stop at one thats fine but that there slope sure is slippery aint it!

Thanks ISOM - yep - got my eye on that slope. I've melted all the ice and put some sand down. Silly to give in after all that time but still proud of myself for resiting any more and not having any since. Though it would be nice to have one occasionally I don't think that I've really got the will power to just cut down like some.

Jo - thanks for the kind comments. Mrs BHB is not doing so well now, she's now back up to half or a bottle of wine a night on the nights she has got some money to buy it with. I think she's getting uptight with me nagging at her now .
It would be much easier for me if she wasn't drinking, but she enjoys the red stuff too much, bless her.

I have to say its nice not 'thinking' about alcohol ALL the time now. It was only a couple of months ago that I was running my life around the next drink and looking forward in the mornings for when I finished work in the evening so that I could have one. I can honestly say that an hour did not pass when I didn't at one time think of drink at some point, every day! Now I'm glad of my acheivement. Yes I still think about it, and yes crave it, and worry about it!
But at least its only a few times a day that I fancy one now, not craving one from breakfast through the day until I could have one.
Mollypolly - great stuff. Keep it up :T :T

Best wishes everyone

BHB