The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread!

ltm07

Hi all! Well been a bit this week on the alcohol front to be honest. I have had a week's holiday but even so I know that I shouldn't be drinking as much as I am. So it's still 4 NNDs fo me but I WILL have at least 2 or 3 days off the ale before the end of the month. Next Saturday is the big test though, as it's my Cousin's stag day. I think the best way to deal with this is to not go in rounds with anyone so I can pace myself, although this will be difficult in itself as people are bound to buy each other drinks. It wouldn't be so bad if we were drinking in town, but we are going to another town 20 miles away,so no sneaking off when I've had enough:( .Just hope I'm in the right frame of mind to drink soft drinks when I've had enough. Really looking orward to the day out to be honest, but at the same time I hope I'm sensible enough to take it easy & not drink too much. ISOM sorry to hear about the circumstances surrounding your Dad & I can relate to you in that respect. My Dad is an alcoholic, although not with whisky but lager & has been told to cut down by the doctor so many times. He is from what I would call the 'sociable drinking' generation IYKWIM. He likes to go down to the local working mens club & sinks at least 5 or 6 pints every night. He did cut down big time & now stays in a couple of nights a week, but even then drinks 6 to 8 cans. We have all tried to help him in the past but being blunt, you can only help someone so much who won't help themselves. I am surprised that he has had no major illnesses (God forbid) but we know & he surely knows that he can't keep abusing his body like that forever. As for me I have to snap out of this constant drinking & get fit again. I have put so much weight on in the last 4 or 5 years that I need to cut down on the fatty foods & lager & then I shall maybe start feeling better about myself & life in general. Hope everyone else is ok & stay strong. All the best!!

Bismarck

jo1972 wrote: »

Same for me, I almost ordered an extra recycling box!

I had bags that I used to take to the carpark recycling point when I'd got enough and there were some workmen redoing a spot of tarmac. They saw me draw up and decided to have their break and watch as I recycled everything before coming up with the worthy understatement of "do you like yer beer, mister?".

I was going to claim ownership of a hotel down the road but decided the conversation was unlikely to improve so I didn't encourage them.

jo1972

Bismarck wrote: »

I had bags that I used to take to the carpark recycling point when I'd got enough and there were some workmen redoing a spot of tarmac. They saw me draw up and decided to have their break and watch as I recycled everything before coming up with the worthy understatement of "do you like yer beer, mister?".

I was going to claim ownership of a hotel down the road but decided the conversation was unlikely to improve so I didn't encourage them.

I know what I'm like, I reckon I would've said 'nah, I'm an alcoholic, you got a problem with that?' whilst looking straight in their eyes and waiting for a reply :rotfl:

SamanthaA

Some of these tales make me laugh, some of these tales make me cry & some of these tales make me think "there for the grace of Gof go I"

My father also died of alcohol related liver failure, he drank for years both in public & in secret - half a bottle of whiskey stashed under drivers seat! On top of kitchen cupboards, and probably a few other places.
Wasn`t actually the alcohol, but when finally diagnosed with arthritis they gave him the strong painkillers - the ones that say do not take if you have liver problems, they/he/we didn`t know how bad his liver was & it failed.

Unfortunatly, he was in hosp when I got the call to go, at 5am. I was forced to take my DS as there was no one to have him (single mum.) Forunatly my cousin came with his mum & was able to take DS home, but not before he saw the state of my dad. This is why my DS hates me drinking - he thinks I will end up like that. And unfortunatly so do I!

This was supposed to be a happy post, congratulating myself on clearing the weekend without a drink!

18/31
22 for stella

In_Search_Of_Me

Morning all...
Jo only you can do it. We're supporting you all the way but ultimately we cannot say no for you
Bismark thanks for yet more powerful & heartfelt posts. I think much of what you say will reach out to those who are near rock bottom so keep posting.
Without posting too much on open (due to others info more than my own) forum I can honestly say that much of my early life experiences were negative due to alch...while I havent not drunk to the point of damaging my life & those around me there is a fine line and I was a we bit too close for my liking!! Thankfully am far away from that now and feel so much better for it! Well done Samantha - BH w/e are esp hard! Maybe reflecting on your dad will give you extra resolve next time you want a drink...
Hugs all!

yellowmonkey

Hi

Still around just not posting much. Still trying to cut down and I must admit I have quite a bit so a small step in the right direction.
Good luck to everyone with their personnal battles and keep going.

Much harder than stopping smoking though. Well for me anyway.

Hope you all have a lovely Sunday and Bank holiday. Back to work tomorrow for me

ttfn

ym

jo1972

Samantha, sorry to hear about what happened to your dad, it certainly makes sense for your DS to feel like that then doesn't it, things can be quite black and white to kids I think. Well done, you are doing fantastic, keep it up!

ISOM, I'm actually the opposite, I had no negativity in my childhood due to alcohol. My parents rarely drank, only if we had visitors and dad had a couple of drinks at the social club on a Sunday before lunch so I can't even say I inherited it!

I've still not bought the Allen Carr book which I'd planned to do this weekend, but lost my bank card so can't get it now till I get the new card which will be a week or 10 days, how bluddy frustrating. I might have to actually GO to the shop to buy it! Which one is it I've got to get?

xx

jo1972

Hi YM, missed your post.

Congrats on the cutting back, I hope you are feeling better for it?

xx

nearly-there_4

Bismarck wrote: »

part of me wishes I could just have the one and it be under control. I've no regrets, I can't do it and I'm asking for trouble if I try..it's just the way things are...
/quote]

But how can we control it? Alcohol is a drug...............it's addictive.
The difference between an alcoholic and a normal drinker is one of control............ a normal drinker can control his drinking and an alcoholic can't?

'The statement begs the question: what is 'normal drinking? (The AA) infers that it is drinking at such a level that you suffer no physical, mental, or social ill-effects. But how many 'normal' drinkers do you know who have never thrown up; or been drunk or hung-over; or been offensive or acted stupidly through drinking alcohol?...........and alcoholics can and do exercise control some of the time...............so 'normal drinkers' occasionally lose control and alcoholics do occasionally gain it .....................the difference is surely not in an inherent physical or mental defect but one of degree..................an alcoholic is at an advanced stage of the same disease' ie normal drinkers are already hooked. Allen Carr

Don't forget he says..............alcohol is a highly addictive drug................and we're brainwashed into taking it !! 90 per cent of the adult population drink alcohol.

Later on in the book he goes onto say that using willpower to give up drinking is not the solution. After all alcoholics are very strong willed.....................why else would you carry on drinking when you know what it does to you. Allen Carr states that we are brainwashed into thinking that the failure to give up drinking lies with the person themself, ie the lack of willpower, when in fact, it lies with the addictive nature of the drug and the brainwashing we've all undergone (don't underestimate the brainwashing)
The problem of controlling alcohol lies with the conflict of wills (the schizophrenia)...............one part of your brain is saying 'Please don't give in and take that drink' and the other part of the brain which craves the drink (the little monster -the addiction). is saying 'ive me a drink'.
Allen Carr explodes the myths of why we drink. He sets out to prove that we've been brainwashed to think that alcohol is a much needed pleasure and prop. He then systematically goes through the reasons we 'think' we drink and basically debunks the myths and 'unbrainwashes' you. You're left wondering why you ever fell for the drink in the first place. .......................and with that information you're free for the rest of your life.

I'm so glad I read the book - it really hit a nerve. I'm learning to stop blaming myself (what a weight that is off my shoulders) and hopefully ready to get on with enjoying my life.

ps It's sunny but very windy here..................and there's lots of housework to be done (yuck!)

jo1972

The book sounds very similar to the smoking one, I presume they work on the same lines anyway. Why is it everything that's addictive is bad for you!!!