We are being evicted, some advice please...... the date has arrived......

vivatifosi

Forgot to mention, in Hemel they have something called the Paradise Furniture Project where you can pick up furniture and stuff for the new house. I knew MOT had a houseful already, but there may be some bits and pieces there.

Here's a link: http://www.hertsdirect.org/comdirectory/comvol/comorg2y/furnscheme3/878838

My family all give their bits and bobs to Paradise and they've handed over some nice stuff over the years, though I've heard sometimes its really good, and sometimes it only looks suitable for a bonfire - sounds like a visit to TK Maxx's clearance racks to me!

supersavershal

miss_corerupted wrote: »

i think you need to nag!!! who cares what some woman in an office thins of you as long as i gets you what you need!!

And personally in work the more people nag/moan at me i deal with them first to get rid of them!!! same prob applies everywhere (i shouldn't i know, but i do)

PS. Good luck with everything

When people nag/moan at me in work I make them wait longer and make life as difficult as I can for them.
I dont mean to be horrible but people who are doing their work are not there to be moaned and nagged at, where I work no one jumps the que because they shouted loudest, they are usually treated better when they treat me with respect and act in a polite manner as I do to them.

vivatifosi

supersavershal wrote: »

When people nag/moan at me in work I make them wait longer and make life as difficult as I can for them.
I dont mean to be horrible but people who are doing their work are not there to be moaned and nagged at, where I work no one jumps the que because they shouted loudest, they are usually treated better when they treat me with respect and act in a polite manner as I do to them.

There's a difference between moaning and nagging, and knowing your rights and being assertive. I agree with supersavershal that you should be polite and respectful, however that doesn't mean you should roll over and give in. Also, assertiveness is one of the hardest things to fight back against.

supersavershal

vivatifosi wrote: »

There's a difference between moaning and nagging, and knowing your rights and being assertive. I agree with supersavershal that you should be polite and respectful, however that doesn't mean you should roll over and give in. Also, assertiveness is one of the hardest things to fight back against.

Yes assertiveness is good but it needs to be used in a manner which does not get the other persons heckles up, after all blue monkey needs these people to be on her side, she would be better off being friendly.Whatever blue monkey can throw at these people im sure they have heard it all a million times.There are many, many people out there in a similar position with children with autistic spectrum conditions, she is not unique so I think keeping on good terms with the council employees is in her benefit.
I have worked with many families who have children with disabilities and getting the housing dept to listen is extremely difficult, I have written letters on families behalf for rehousing but I am always told there are many families in the same position and how do they prioritise one family against another.
The families I work with usually have children with cystic fibrosis, cancer or cerebral palsy so have profound needs, if they cant go to the top of the list who can?

poorbabe

vivatifosi wrote: »

And because I'm in to ping cuisine.......

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: luv it!!!

Hi Viv :j

blue_monkey_2

Hi everyone,

Feeling OK today but got some letters with HMCS on them opened it and scanned through for a date... 16, 16, 16.... that's not long. Turned out to be the possession order papers!! We got them nearly 2 weeks AFTER we should have left!! LOL!! It left me feeling very sick though - even though I know it is coming it just means everything is so final and after being her for most of 35 years it does now feel really strange.

Packed some more stuff , I reckon we can clear the rest of this place in 2 days though so that feels OK. Wondering what else I can get away with packing and if the kids will notice that some of their toys have 'disappeared' into the garage into boxes......

Viv, thank you so much for the offer on the cooker, that sounds great, we can touch base when we have somewhere if that is OK as we do not really know how long it will be. Fingers crossed we are sorted for Xmas though and in our own place for then.

Have had a letter through the door today, the are building 13 HA places in the village, on the wasteland next to where my mother lives and the other ones near where sisters ex-husband lives, it does not say how many bedrooms they are going to have but the amount they are cramming in to the land they have to be 1 or 2 beds I would have thought.

Shal, I have spent the last 6, nearly 7 months, being polite and respectful, doing as I am asked, sending in what I am told and putting up with being spoken to like something that hs been walked in on a shoe. And look where it has got me, a load of lies about me on a letter to the MP!! I will not stand aside and have the MP be told that we are 'refusing what they have offered us' as this is a blatant lie to make us look bad as thy have not offered anything. Am I supposed to just let this go?

Maybe you did not read, we are not trying to get 'to the top of the list', if they had given us what they said they would give us then we would be at the top of the list anyway. But hold on, they have changed their mind about that and have duped us into staying here to be evicted by a bailiff instead. Lies again.

As I say though, it is not about nagging it is getting what you are entitled to. THEY (this is the council and their doctors) were the ones telling the MP in a letter sent in February that a hostel is unsuitable yet here they are, in their most recent letter, telling the MP I have made it clear that a hostel is unsuitable and I have refused their offers. Clear and blatant lies and I am sick of it now. I'll ignore being treated like crap but I will not ignore having lies told about me, it is unacceptable behaviour from people who are paid and have a duty to help families like us.

At the end of the day I can nag all I like but if there is nowhere to live then there is nowhere to live - end of. I've no problem with this and I accept this, we shall wait. However, they have not done what they have said they would do and to top this all off they think that by making me look bad that they can turn it onto me and that is why we did not get housed. And I want to know why. I am pretty sure they did not expect the MP to forward the letters onto us and that has been their mistake. And I don't care who's heckles I get up, when they have to lie in order to make themselves look like they have been helping when they haven't there has to be something wrong somewhere doesn't there? I think that in itself is disgraceful.

blue_monkey_2

Viv 'ping cuisine'

Fab!! Me too but I cannot get away with that these days!! x

mumoftwins

Hi BM,

Been following but not posting as its bringing back many a bad memory. But what I will say is that you must fight, the council will twist everything you say to their advantage - I know this as despite a Psychiatrist and a Psychologist saying that I needed help and had/have a mental health problem, they took absolutely no notice of this medical advice even though it was there in black and white! B*st*ards.

supersavershal

Blue Monkey I have read your thread from the begining, and yes you are fighting for what you are entitled to and I by no means condone the lying that has been done.What I am trying to say is that you might be entitled to housing but so will a lot of others who are in a similar position to you, I dont want you to pin your hopes on the list coming out with a suitable home for you and you beleiving that will be yours.You will not be aware of any other families that are also "entitled" as that infomation is confidential, you will not know of their points or their personal situation.How would you feel if the list came out, you saw a perfect property and it was given to another family, would you feel that your need was greater than theirs, you would not know if it was or not.
You may have been treated badly along the way, you are in a vunerable situation but you still need to keep it together and be rational and polite, being any other way will get you nowhere.
There may be a family tonight who are made homeless and who have a child with AS disorder (its getting very common now) they would probably go in priority to you if a home was on the list tomorrow.
A very close friend of mine has just started a job as a nurse specialising in Aspergers in a dedicated clinic.She will be working with families on behaviour programmes, she says it is amazing, is there something like that where you live?

blue_monkey_2

Hi Shal,

The point of staying in the house was, I was told, to be given extra points so that any place that came out we applied for we would get. Her words were 'you will be guaranteed to get the place you express an interest in so we can keep you out of the hostel'. This is what we was told, this is what we believed. Also because they hve told the MP that I had refused offers when they have not made any - to make themselves look better maybe? Just when is lying acceptable? It isn't. They won't give me the answers so let's see if they give the MP the answers!!

I don't give a toss where we live as long as we have somewhere and I know full well we will end up in the hostel, for example, today I found homes for my fish and wardrobes (hurrah) almost everything is done in the house and as each day draws nearer I pack more and more, the only thing I have left to do if we have to leave tomorrow is put the clothes into cases and take the boxes to the storage unit. Then we will come back for the furniture and get them to the eople who said they would have the for us.

I might add about you saying about his AS, THEY are the ones that told the MP that the hostel was unsuitable for him as I have it here in writing, THEY are the ones who said they were going to house us because of this and us staying in the house gives THEM more time to find us something suitable. They built our hopes up a long time ago - only now I am back down to earth. If it is a lie then I want to know it was a lie and I will let them tell the MP why they lied to him - I have it in writing so there is nothing to 'prove'. Surely lying to him is Gross Misconduct?? They can only be lying as they have something to hide. Not doing the job they said they was going to do maybe.

So yes, I will fight, am fighting for what we was told we would get - verbally and in writing!!

The reason I want something on the list is so I can kick up more of a stink via the MP - because I want to know where the points are that they told me I could have for staying in this house. If I am not getting them let them tell him why. Do you not think it is acceptable I question where these so called points are? Do you not think I should have what they told me I could have? Sorry, but I do else we would have left the house 2 weeks ago and gone to the hostel to get the points by being 'homeless' and then we would have been 'to of the list'. Because we have been awarded points by their doctor and because we have points for being on the list for a long time, if someone else with an AS child became homeless tonight then they would not have these points because they take about 6-8 weeks to get. This is why wewas told we would have that guarentee of getting somewhere.

At the moment my stuff is in paid storage. If I was so sure we would be getting somewhere permanant I'd put it in my transit and save some money! Please do not think this is about me getting to the top of the list as it isn't, this is about the council telling lies about me refusing what they have offered. Sorry, but that is unacceptable as they have not offered me anything and yes, I am going to kick up a stink about it. I have been rational and polite and they still treat me like a joke. With all due respect you do not have the letter sitting in front of you - it is not very nicely written at all.

I do find it hard to explain so I hope that makes sense.

In regard to the behaviour therapy, my doc is chasing it up as CAMHS keep on refsuing him despite 3 doctors referring him. He has told me that he will speak to them personally as he has been reffered for behaviour therapy, I am just hitting a brick wall, first he was too young as under 4 then after the other 2 docs reffered him he is too young as under 10!

He has been to CDU and he has come up with a high 'pass rate' on everything - but on performance he has come out at being 67 months and he was only 48 months (I was very pleased, depste his 'faults' he is a clever boy it is just I cannot get him to sot down and do anything. However, they have picked up many other things that would relate to ADHD/Aspergers that he needs help with - it is just getting the help that he needs from the right people but fingers crossed the doc can deal with it and get the ball rolling with them.

Some things seem more important than others some days and as the bailiff date is due then the housing situation is the thing to deal with now and packing all I need to.

PS. In a bizarre way I am looking forward to being in the hostel and beig with lots of other people over the summer as many of my friends have to work and so I end up being stuck at home on my own with the kids. It is hard to make new friends because of how Ryan is as well, many of he mums at school give me a wide berth because he is so full on I have some good friends but I do not like to impose myself onto people all the time. I figures in a hostel I'd have no housework to do so I'll go to the car boot get myself some books and sit in the garden and read while they play. I'll keep their scooters in my car and bring them in when I can. No, I can honestly say that having spoken to my HV about things it has given me a new slant on what it will bring

PPS. No housework