Giving partner an allowance?

Pollycat

D1ss1lusioned said:

It definitely sounds more difficult to obtain the required finances for things back then. I know my partner's Dad said he bought the house over a chat at the pub and got extras thrown in in return for doing some work for the previous owner etc. They rented many of their appliances on payment schemes as opposed to buying outright.

I admittedly got into a financial mess from Uni due to being oblivious to how things worked moneywise and didn't see the pitfalls of loans and credit cards and opted to use credit cards to avoid getting a student loan. Nowadays I stay well away from loans and credit cards. I haven’t had a credit card for many years now. I only used to them before for car insurance but now that's really cheap for me I can pay in one go.

Definitely pros and cons the fact that now you can get a load of credit available to spend just sat at home and accessing a website as opposed to all the work involved in years gone by.

Credit cards can work for you if you understand how they work and use them sensibly.
Maxing out your credit limit on luxuries and then paying the minimum off each month is not the sensible way.
We put virtually everything on credit cards but pay them off in full every month.

But you both seem to be comparing the 'old days' to  how things used to be..
Forget how things used to be.
You are living in today.

D1ss1lusioned

Pollycat said:

D1ss1lusioned said:

It definitely sounds more difficult to obtain the required finances for things back then. I know my partner's Dad said he bought the house over a chat at the pub and got extras thrown in in return for doing some work for the previous owner etc. They rented many of their appliances on payment schemes as opposed to buying outright.

I admittedly got into a financial mess from Uni due to being oblivious to how things worked moneywise and didn't see the pitfalls of loans and credit cards and opted to use credit cards to avoid getting a student loan. Nowadays I stay well away from loans and credit cards. I haven’t had a credit card for many years now. I only used to them before for car insurance but now that's really cheap for me I can pay in one go.

Definitely pros and cons the fact that now you can get a load of credit available to spend just sat at home and accessing a website as opposed to all the work involved in years gone by.

Credit cards can work for you if you understand how they work and use them sensibly.
Maxing out your credit limit on luxuries and then paying the minimum off each month is not the sensible way.
We put virtually everything on credit cards but pay them off in full every month.

But you both seem to be comparing the 'old days' to  how things used to be..
Forget how things used to be.
You are living in today.

Definitely, thankyou. In the cases I used them years ago they tended to be 0% interest etc. And paid them off quickly. Unfortunately she has got herself into a hole. She has got her worst card on a payment plan now with the interest frozen and doing a similar thing with another one too. She has about 4 or 5 as well as at her overdraft limit on her current account. She gets letters from them and it was one she had last week that she acted upon and led her to do the same with another.
Just hoping she's on the right path but due to her having "no money" at the moment I have paid for some extras especially groceries which should I believe be temporary. She has paid for barely anything the last couple of weeks but should have some money shortly.
Great to have views reinforced on here as I point out all the time how she's living in the past.

RAS

Hi again

Just re-read your thread.

What your GF is doing is making Arrangements to Pay, which is basically a Debt Management Plan, albeit not for all her debts. This means she will get AP markers on her credit record. That will prevent her getting further credit.

When people come on DFW to do a DMP, we recommend that they allow the debts to default first. That freezes the interest and fees. With AP markers its more hit and miss.

Defaults damage the credit record for 6 years and are removed regardless.
AP markers damage the credit record for 6 years after the debt is paid off. 

If your GF wants to restrict her access to credit for as long as possible, AP markers are a good way to do it.

She might also look at affordability claims. These can repair credit records and/or remove interest already paid in some instances. It's generally best to do these with 6 years of signing up. 

I'd really suggest she goes over to DFW for more help.

D1ss1lusioned

RAS said:

Hi again

Just re-read your thread.

What your GF is doing is making Arrangements to Pay, which is basically a Debt Management Plan, albeit not for all her debts. This means she will get AP markers on her credit record. That will prevent her getting further credit.

When people come on DFW to do a DMP, we recommend that they allow the debts to default first. That freezes the interest and fees. With AP markers its more hit and miss.

Defaults damage the credit record for 6 years and are removed regardless.
AP markers damage the credit record for 6 years after the debt is paid off. 

If your GF wants to restrict her access to credit for as long as possible, AP markers are a good way to do it.

She might also look at affordability claims. These can repair credit records and/or remove interest already paid in some instances. It's generally best to do these with 6 years of signing up. 

I'd really suggest she goes over to DFW for more help.

Thankyou, she did mention about it being on her record for 6 years and affecting getting credit. I'll mention what you said to her and see what's happening with it all.

MEM62

D1ss1lusioned said:

What do you think?

I'm late to the party but had to respond.  If she wants more money then she should get of her backside and get a job.  This does not sound like a healthy relationship and on the basis of the information provided in your post you are being taken advantage of.     

D1ss1lusioned

MEM62 said:

D1ss1lusioned said:

What do you think?

I'm late to the party but had to respond.  If she wants more money then she should get of her backside and get a job.  This does not sound like a healthy relationship and on the basis of the information provided in your post you are being taken advantage of.     

Thankyou, appreciate it. I worked out last month too as well as paying all the bills and mortgage etc we both spent around £300 on groceries and household items (kitchen towel etc.) So pretty much half of all that too. I do point out if she was even earning minimum wage full time or even part time we'd be paying off the mortgage much quicker and having a much better quality of life.

Pollycat

D1ss1lusioned said:

MEM62 said:

D1ss1lusioned said:

What do you think?

I'm late to the party but had to respond.  If she wants more money then she should get of her backside and get a job.  This does not sound like a healthy relationship and on the basis of the information provided in your post you are being taken advantage of.     

Thankyou, appreciate it. I worked out last month too as well as paying all the bills and mortgage etc we both spent around £300 on groceries and household items (kitchen towel etc.) So pretty much half of all that too. I do point out if she was even earning minimum wage full time or even part time we'd be paying off the mortgage much quicker and having a much better quality of life.

But does she listen?
What incentive does she have to get a job?

Emmia

Pollycat said:

D1ss1lusioned said:

MEM62 said:

D1ss1lusioned said:

What do you think?

I'm late to the party but had to respond.  If she wants more money then she should get of her backside and get a job.  This does not sound like a healthy relationship and on the basis of the information provided in your post you are being taken advantage of.     

Thankyou, appreciate it. I worked out last month too as well as paying all the bills and mortgage etc we both spent around £300 on groceries and household items (kitchen towel etc.) So pretty much half of all that too. I do point out if she was even earning minimum wage full time or even part time we'd be paying off the mortgage much quicker and having a much better quality of life.

But does she listen?
What incentive does she have to get a job?

I think what this boils down to is whether the GFs lack of financial contribution is a relationship ending issue for the OP.

If the OP is unable or does not want to end the relationship then that gives the GF a fair amount of power to continue as she is.