A Fresh Start, a year of growth and balance.

liselle

So sorry that you’re still having to wait for your money.I would’ve thought the CMS would just take it, especially as it’s in arrears.They’re not going to concern themselves about him being overdrawn.

BudgetingBelinda

missymoo81 said:

You’re doing so well! Sorry that ex is being such a pain! My ex was much the same and just refused to pay at one point. But it’s all sorted now so there is hope.

Thanks @missymoo81 👌🏼🙌🏼 well done and 🤞🏼here! 

BudgetingBelinda

(Removed by Forum Team) 

Hahhaa! There’s definitely a chip of parental responsibility missing in this one’s case. Selfish as standard. I’m annoyed at myself for letting it go on for so long. 

BudgetingBelinda

liselle said:

So sorry that you’re still having to wait for your money.I would’ve thought the CMS would just take it, especially as it’s in arrears.They’re not going to concern themselves about him being overdrawn.

It says standing order for the weekly amount on collect and pay. I don’t know if they’ll try and get the arrears like that too if possible? I don’t think he has an overdraft option- it just bounces. 🥴
Thank you though, at least I don’t have the nasty messages anymore, & I don’t have to ask anymore. 

Good luck CMS 🤪🤞🏼

BudgetingBelinda

A wonderful day! Loads (😜) of washing done. So much to do around the house but I needed a chill ish day so still haven’t done the dining room organising. I have half term week off next week so I must get it more organised then. Then the general chores tomorrow will continue. I rode friends horse, walked dog and absolutely loved the day of self care 🥳 
Feeling a lot less burnt out than last week. Will take this week as chill as possible. Pace myself so I don’t end up completely exhausted on the week off. I want such a balanced week of chill, fun and organising. 

Here’s hoping 🤩

BudgetingBelinda

A good day. Got some free storage units from a friend and that is the carrot to the donkey of my organisation over half term next week. Did DS’s footy and dog walked simultaneously. Washing done, beds cleaned, floors have not been but I swept! Half term will be where I make my gains! Just doing enough to get by this week. 😝 roast chicken done, lots of leftovers, blueberry muffins for the week done. 4 days of work and I’m reclaiming more chill, self care, organisation and funs. 

Oh and on a budget! 🧐🙌🏼🤞🏼👌🏼💪🏼✅🌟❤️

dawnybabes

Let’s hope every time it bounces he gets charged by the bank ! 

BudgetingBelinda

dawnybabes said:

Let’s hope every time it bounces he gets charged by the bank ! 

I doubt it but yes! I don’t think he thinks that CMS will get the money, he smugly said that they’ll be ‘lucky’ previously. I don’t know if they will either but so far they seem to have the measure of him by going straight to collect and pay. And it’s looking like that was a very valid route! 

Checked CMS account and this weeks says ‘missed’ as well, so he’s now already in nearly £300of arrears on CMS books (many more in my books but there’s little to be done about that). 

I’m very thrilled to not have to be navigating it solo and there’s something about the CMS letters and correspondence that is strangely comforting for me, even if there is no money forthcoming. To see it clearly written repeatedly that x is what he should pay and then the missed payments/arrears just makes me not feel so gaslighted/gaslit (grammar 🥴?!) anymore. Checked out of the narcissist cycle. 

joedenise

If he doesn't pay up I think they'll then move to having it taken directly from his salary/wages before he even sees it and his employer will then now what an a*sehole he is!

liselle

Yes that’s exactly what they’ll do.