A Fresh Start, a year of growth and balance.

BudgetingBelinda

Awake a bit early. I am excited for my day off. I was going to write a list of what I want to get done this weekend. But I am actually going to just see how I go, with no pressure or list. That seems to make me more productive? I am definitely going to spend a lot of time relaxing but I do want to get some things done too. 

Budget is going ok so far, must stay mindful, friend has invited me out for food and catch up and I really don’t want to spend any money on dining out. I also just so love my own time when I can get it. I’m becoming in love with my hermit time -home alone with the dog, when boys go to their dads. 

Decluttered car yesterday and bits and bobs around the kitchen. That’s about as exciting as it gets around here at the moment! 🎉 

BudgetingBelinda

Washed one bed and hoovered and mopped already 💪🏼 I so want a takeaway tonight 🤪 my fave Chinese is shut atm and not sure if I fancy and Indian. And need to watch £’s to get EF on track. Will my willpower hold out? Dog walk to do, in the meantime I shall watch Netflix and do more washing! Honestly, what a wild life!

missymoo81

Loving the sound of your day yesterday. I am v much the same and love the hermit life when the children go to their dads. Love having them around, but love relaxing and getting time to do stuff. 

BudgetingBelinda

missymoo81 said:

Loving the sound of your day yesterday. I am v much the same and love the hermit life when the children go to their dads. Love having them around, but love relaxing and getting time to do stuff. 

Absolutely! I get a bit antsy after one night. Ready for them back! Hermit life is so ticking my boxes at the moment and has been for a while. I avoided meeting up with a friend as I just needed hermit-ness! Feel a bit boring but I do love my own time and space so much. Just for 24 ish hours anyway! I hope you had a lovely hermit time! 

BudgetingBelinda

Haven’t sent meter readings since September. What a mistakaaa2maker! Gas and Electric are a lot. I have been paying monthly, but £140 and now is up to about £170pm gas and electric. I am not impressed 😶 just changed the heating times to a bit less!
Really just need to be so good with groceries this month. I have an in budget basket ready to check out but will try and hold it until mid week.

I feel like this month will be a really important month financially. If I can finally get to 2k EF (or near there) I have March as a bit of a breather to get a buffer in my current account and begin on the holiday fund. However it is very likely to become the bathroom fund. 🥴
I feel like this month I will see if my grand plans- which look ok on paper, will actually work out in reality. I’m aiming for many NSD’s, less food, less wine. Let’s gooo! 

BudgetingBelinda

Gawd dammmmittt. Went to Aldi for a few bits. Overspent. No online basket checking out now for the week 🥴.

In good news though - got an update from CMS and DS’s dad, having stopped paying recently all together, and being inconsistent since August 2024 (and many times prior) now paying via collect and pay! And the calculation is going to be £128pm month more for him than he was (because they add on 20% to him) and the boys will get £66 more per month than they did when he did pay (as he wasn’t paying what he should) and that’s with the 4% reduction for them doing collect and pay! 

I wasn’t expecting this as he’s self employed and newly set up a LTD company. I thought he’d be falling into all the loopholes. Last I heard from CMS they were going to ask him to do direct pay (no fees) & clearly that didn’t work, he probably didn’t even respond to them/they can tell how useless he is? So I presume they are taking it straight from his bank account. I’m sure it will bounce at times, as as soon as he has any funds he splurges it away on rubbish. At least this way they will keep track of any missed payments and hold him to account -hopefully?

Should of done this sooner to avoid all the toxic nonsense. I don’t know if he knows all this yet, I’m awaiting some kickback. But he’s had a lot of patience from me, and lived rent/mortgage free with me for 15 years previously so quite frankly he can stick it! I’m so hopeful it works out as it will make a difference to what I can offer the boys. A holiday might actually be possible 🤞🏼. 

I won’t fully let myself believe it will work until money is in my account- regularly. And he still might weedle into those loopholes that some do. But a hopeful sense is occurring that I might be done with another part of dealing with his nonsense behaviour. And the boys will be better off. Wooooooo. 

liselle

Oh yes, CMS won’t let him get away with missing a payment.They’re very used to hearing all the excuses.

BudgetingBelinda

liselle said:

Oh yes, CMS won’t let him get away with missing a payment.They’re very used to hearing all the excuses.

Hurrah! Good news! 💪🏼🤞🏼💯

Bit annoyed I held off for so long as I thought he’d weedle out of it, when he stopped paying I thought there’s nothing to lose! Apart from his nasty-ness when I was having to ask for it. I’m so thrilled to be done with it! 🤞🏼
His excuses are abundant. He told me he’d have his bank statements ready for CMS and they can’t take what’s not there etc, he has alot of outgoings, is only taking essential money out of his business etc etc. Well I think CMS and general consensus is paying for one’s children is actually an essential. Not holidays for himself, branded clothes, AirPods, newest iPhone etc etc. 

I’m guessing they checked his bank account as he hasn’t been LTD/self employed for long. 

Just from when I did the application mid Jan- he’s got £130 to pay/in arrears from then and then the ongoing weekly amount should be deducted from his account tomorrow so 🤞🏼. 

Hear so many CMS sad stories where paying parents somehow get out of it.

BudgetingBelinda

CMS seem to be having similar problems to me in getting blood out of a stone! Arrears are adding up via collect and pay. I don’t know if they will try and take it from his bank account? It says standing order weekly from what I can
see. He’s probably draining it when it’s due to be taken. They are saying they are trying to contact him weekly but to no avail. I am just not mentioning it at all to him. Over that. Glad it’s in the CMS hands and if they get the money that will be great, but if they don’t they’ll be the ones having to keep chasing and not me. And maybe he’ll face some real actions to be responsible but I won’t hold my breath! 

I am being organised with shopping, meal plans, and groceries but still very much a work in progress to get in the budget I’d like. 

Lots of work towards EF required atm. 

✅💯🤞🏼

missymoo81

You’re doing so well! Sorry that ex is being such a pain! My ex was much the same and just refused to pay at one point. But it’s all sorted now so there is hope.