It won't happen overnight. But if I do nothing it won't happen at all. (MFW diary 5761)

South_coast

I did it on my own, too - it's great to have that feeling of achievement and know no-one else can get the credit for it!

seventh88

Thanks @beanielou and a huge well done to you! Debt sometimes rolls around again doesn’t it, but when you know you’ve tackled it once, you know you can do it again.

thanks @southcoast, ha ha yep that’s true, the credit is all on us, isn’t it! I like your thinking.

seventh88

Hi everyone,

Here's an update from me:

Challenges

1. A friend asked to meet for a coffee. She has recently bought a house, outright, by herself, as she has enough cash to do this. My initial response was 'I don't want to see her because I'll leave feeling bad about myself, because she has more money than me and I'll compare myself'. She's the same age so the comparision feels stronger in this sense. And then I said to myself 'stop being an idiot, you like spending time with her, and her work situation and life circumstances are different to yours'. And I did, and we met for a coffee, and it was lovely, and I managed to not compare myself but actually see a lot of the differences in our situation. It was a positive challenge in the end.

Successes
1. I saw a quote recently that really resonated. 'Happiness is not about having more, it's about noticing more'. Now, I don't really agree with this in some circumstances: if you don't have food, shelter, water, safety - then no, happiness will not come from noticing more, and the statement is unhelpful. But - when you do have those things, as I do - then yes, there's a lot to be said for paying more attention to the things and the joy and the value that you already have in life, and this is what I'm aiming to do more of on my MFW journey. I've been gazing at the garden growing, I've been pausing with my coffee, and I've been leaving things on shelves in shops, gone unbought, because I know they'll just come home with me and gather dust only to be taken to the charity shop in a years time having been used once. Sometimes, a phrase or a saying like that just hits home and it helps.
2. I have booked a weekend away with my 13 year old niece to a gig she wants to go to. Whilst this wasn't I immediately thought of when I talked in my last post about booking a holiday, I'm actually so excited about it, it will be great for the two of us to spend time together and it's definitely going to be a highlight of the year. She brings so  much fun to my life.

Next steps

1. Job interview Wednesday. Prepping this weekend. Not a promotion but a sideways move that's better for me in the long term. Wish me luck!

Thank you all for your support and cheerleading, and I hope your MFW journeys are going as well as they can be.

doingitanyway

Well done for your meeting your challenge head-on

Good luck with interview prep

Mysaving

Good luck with your interview!

sunshineli

Well done for not comparing yourself to your friend. It’s really tough and something I am working on too. 

Good luck with the interview!

dawnybabes

Good luck with the interview. 

Its hard ‘adulting’ and having to make decisions, I’ve found it much easier now I’ve a set of ‘core tradesmen ‘ around me to advise. 

benbenandme

Spent a lovely hour or so reading your diary, another one going it alone with the mortgage here! I agree it can be daunting, but just think, you have no-one sabotaging your efforts to stick to a budget by spending on unnecessary things, no-one to claim half of all your hard work if you were to split ... everything you are doing is down to your hard work, your efforts and you deserve to enjoy the rewards xx

doingitanyway

Spike Milligan was asked at an award presented to him if there was anything he wanted to say as he accepted the award. He said: 
'I did it all by myself' and walked off 

seventh88

@doingitanyway - thank you and LOLs to the quote

@mysaving - thank you!

@sunshineli - thank you, and sorry to hear you also struggle with comparison, although it's also reassuring to hear I'm not the only one. If you figure out any great tips for combating this, let me know!

@dawnybabes - thank you and I agree about having good core tradesman. I have a handful now and they are brilliant, I feel very lucky to have largely had very good experiences with trades.

@benbenandme - thank you so much for spending an hour reading my diary, that's so kind of you. It's great to meet someone else also doing a solo mortgage. I'd never thought of that but you're right, it's much easier to stick to a budget without needing to spend on other people's prioritise, there's no one else that can de-rail my efforts, and also - there is no question about whether the house will have to be sold if a relationship breaks up, my home is my home, no one elses.

I really appreciate everyone's encouragement, thank you all for taking the time to do this. I will post and let you know how it goes. I am apprehensive. I think I have a lot of transferrable skills, but not sure if I have enough of the technical knowledge that they're looking for. Still, we'll see, let's go for it!

Hope you all have a good week ahead