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Packed lunch or school dinner?

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  • kempiejon
    kempiejon Posts: 855 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 500 Posts Name Dropper
    Pah, kids controlling parents is all part of that bit of teenagerness when the scrotes think they are in charge and not the parental units. It's time to give up on trying to be in charge, the time to shape them to follow your instructions was years ago. Even if you did a good job they'll be rebelling now. It's likely there'll be other more problematic behaviour to come. As other posters have said pick your battles and realise that your time as parent and pack leader is ending - hopefully.
  • sheramber
    sheramber Posts: 22,621 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts I've been Money Tipped! Name Dropper
    Exodi said:
    sheramber said:
    As you have found at  15 years old you are not going to force him to eat things he doesn't like.
    <snip>
    Sit down with him and make a list of what he does eat then come to an agreement with him what he can have for breakfast and what he can take for lunch from that list.
    But to play devils advocate, what do you do when that list inevitably consists of takeaway, pizza, burgers, chips, chicken nuggets and sweets?

    I don't have a teenager so I appreciate I very well may be naive here, but I don't think you should allow the child to make what are effectively parenting decisions, just like I wouldn't allow him to also set his own curfew.

    What I think would be a better way to go about it would be to present him with a list of options the parent chooses, and let him choose his preferences from that list. I certainly wouldn't be cooking two sets of dinners every night and I certainly wouldn't put my spouse and I in a situation where we have to eat pizza every night because we allowed our child to decide the household meals.
    Apart from the sweets nothing else on your list would be able to be put in a packed lunch , unless you are going to eat cold burgers , cold chips  etc.

    You under estimate the determination of a teenager. My grandson will go without when he doesn’t want to eat something and has done. His packed lunch came home untouched. 

    Eating habits are established when young. It is too late doing it when they are teenagers. The OP’s son has survived for 15 years so she must have provided him with food until now.

    If she has allowed him to eat a brioche until now it is too late to suddenly say not any more.


  • kimwp
    kimwp Posts: 2,994 Forumite
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    I think it's worth saying, from being witness to the battles over food of my friends and family with their children, OP won't have "allowed" this situation, I'm sure it's just she's one of the unlucky, for whom the task has proved impossible. She wouldn't be worrying about him or asking for help otherwise and she has undoubtedly made the choices that felt right at each step.
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