Money Moral Dilemma: Should I accept an expensive present from my boyfriend who owes me money?

tealady

Could you sell the bike for more than he owes you?
If so do that and ditch him.
Or never lend him money again, he sounds like a user.

Kim_13

I wouldn’t accept. Soon you’ll be told he bought you an expensive bike when you try to get the money he owes you. If you wouldn’t have bought the bike yourself, it really has no value and is just a waste. That’s assuming he did pay for it and it isn’t on some form of finance agreement which will later be defaulted on or worse, fell off the back of a lorry…

6000_a_year_is_plenty

Don't accept the gift. Tell him not to waste his money on you while he is in debt. If he can't show financial responsibility then do not get into any more join liabilities such as the flat. Consider leaving him if you think he cannot be trusted to show you all his debts.

Many years ago I had a partner who was £10,000 in debt which she only told me about a year after we had been dating and had moved in together. She was on a decent wage, so had been profligate. I set out a repayment plan in a spreadsheet, and lent her £1,000 to pay off part of her debts (high interest store cards first), and insisted she pay me back at a rate of interest half what she was paying. She did. I lent her a further £1,000, and so on until she was debt free. 

To reinforce the message that paying interest is a mugs game I spent the interest I earned from her on nice bottles of wine for us to share, lording it a bit over my generous girlfriend who was paying for my "free wine". It irritated her, which was the point, she needed to get angry at what the bankers might be enjoying at her expense.

ginat_101

How long have you been together? I was married to a man who NEVER took financial responsibility, he ruined us financially for years.  Challenge your BF, its obviously on your mind, you know it isn't right.  Love walks out the door when you're past the honeymoon period and you have financial problems.  

ginat_101

ginat_101 said:

How long have you been together? I was married to a man who NEVER took financial responsibility, he ruined us financially for years.  Challenge your BF, its obviously on your mind, you know it isn't right.  Love walks out the door when you're past the honeymoon period and you have financial problems.  

Also - VERY VERY likely he got it on credit - another potential issue impacting you.

Ed264

He should have given serious thought as to how he could finance the bike - if by a loan, that adds to his debts. If he bought it straight out, where did he find that £1500? His intentions were good and from the heart, but that doesn't help his financial situation! 

Dannythevampire

This person clearly has no idea how to manage his finances. Get shut of him NOW otherwise your life as well as his will be ruined.

Dizzybird_22

Sorry, but sounds very much my sister's ex-husband...note the word EX. Too much to go into here, but would spend big on gifts for her and his daughter from a previous relationship,  but in debt up to his eyes... which she was dragged into as they were  married. 
Run for the hills, or at least,  if you feel you want to stay, keep all finances separate. Good luck ❤️

Borage

Bet the bike is on credit, also bet the flats in your name only as are all the utility bills. Decent people,especially ones who think something of you wouldnt lend the money in the first place, or at least pay it back as quick as possible. What will happen next month when the rent and bills are due again ? The only place your going with your bloke is into debt

commonsence

Sorry to say this but you will have a miserable life with this man, get out now and if you can pay the rent yourself until you can leave without penalty, unless you can afford this place on your own or with a paying flatmate. Sorry to say this relationship will all end in tears if you don’t end it, seen this scenario so many times.