Watty's Awakening

Watty1

A little more time spent outside yesterday. More logs in the trailer to unload and the branches that were left when the elderflower came up have been chopped up and put in garden bin. We thought we would hire a shredder but with some time spent have saved the money by not hiring and all are gone. We might also get some of the raked up weeds in on top.

That then leaves a mound of soil. We are hoping the tractor and chain harrow can spread that. If not we might need to hire a mini digger to scrape it up and roughly spread then harrow but we are going to try the "free" money option that requires only our labour.

Yesterday I sat out on the newly recovered bit of field and just felt so happy. For many years PPH used this area as a place to store wood he would one day chop for the wood burner and in the early years he did that, but, in the later years it was just a dumping ground really and made worse before he finally left.

The weather was lovely and I sat and admired the lovely field that has slowly been returned to just that.

daisy_1571

Lovely to reclaim another part of your house and land

Suffolk_lass

I don't know if Big River sell the aggregate (our fence contractor does) but they sell the bags, which I needed (delivered this morning)

Watty1

No outside work yesterday. It poured with rain. Have been thinking a lot re business sale and money in the bank and all that and I've realised one of my problems is around 'financial security' and emotional security.

All the time I keep working I keep earning and so mentally I will be ok. I have run my figures lots of ways and I can give up work and be frugal - but - the underlying fear is really very real.

My initial MF journey began so I could give up work but then PPH kept on about how that was unaffordable so I worked to pay off the mortgage on the rental property and although I never finished that we were overdrawn so often that I was bailing him out. Since leaving I've been ok, yes I have had to figure out how to make "more money" so I can invest in pension pot and all that, but I have managed a lot better.

But underneath there is a lot of insecurity.

daisy_1571

Firstly This is an understandable wobble. This is a big change coming and its the brain going waaaaahhh let's go back to where it was sh1te but I knew the sh1te.

I'd try to focus on a couple of things. Whatever situation you were in with pph, no matter what he actually said, the truth is you were keeping both of you going whilst he was secretly doing his siphoning off hobby. Since then you have went forward continuing to increase your overall wealth. Plus, whatever he said was now so long ago and in such different circumstances that it really doesn't apply to your situation now.

But, the wobble is understandable completely. You have worked and earned money for the majority of your life. To be contemplating a future where there isn't that rhythm of 'going to work' and money coming in is huge however its literally what we spend our working lives working for ! No matter how one finishes up working, desired, made redundant, looked forward to for years, dreaded - every one of us has that '......but, but' moment when it dawns on us that good grief this is really happening !!!

However, it generally works out. We do cut our pattern according to our cloth. You will make savings simply by not being mentally bogged down doing all the hours at work. This gives you capacity to look around for bargains, sell some stuff, tidy some stuff, play around with setting up monthly savers so you look forward to money and interest coming out. If you do one every two months you will have a sum of money plus interest maturing every second month from next November. If you could do one and vnm would do the same one the next month you'd have a pot maturing every month.

Things like that, where you are working with the sale of business money, will take a bit of setting up then will chunter on.

Please spend some time looking at all the exciting good stuff coming, get up when you please, weekends entirely to do what you want not extra work, sunny days in winter when you drop everything to sit outside because you can etc etc. Theres loads of clubs and activities that go on during the working week if you want to do stuff but also you can just read a book all afternoon 😉 😀 👍 😄

PennysIntoPounds

Wot @daisy_1571 said, but also you're not banned from ever doing another job or setting up another business or a side hustle. You're quite capable if you feel like it and if you don't feel like it you don't have to 🙂

Bananabreadyum

yes I was going to say, you could still work a few hours a week doing something completely different if you fancied or got bored (very unlikeyl!) or needed some more pennies.

Could you still run the online courses??

KajiKita

All of what the others have said … 😊

But also, is there anyone you trust and respect who has made this transition that you could talk this through with? Sometimes it takes someone else to believe in us for us to start to believe in ourselves. I think this might be one of those times.

KK

Watty1

Thank you for those thoughtful comments. Yesterday I decided that living in limbo land is really not working for me and it is leading to these swings between sell and not sell but also a cold hard look at the fact is that this has been going on for so long and during that time I've been really quite ill and struggling to cope. After all this time I've come up with some alternatives. I want to give up but I want a sensible plan and I'm just not sure that this buyer is it.

Plus, we are now a long way down the "Due Diligence" road and I need to start paying legal fees and accountancy fees. I've done a lot of the work so far myself - but - I now start incurring fees. She clearly is already incurring fees but her finances for the purchase are still "subject to approval". I've no idea what that really means. If I knew she was serious I would talk to my main supplier, but I don't want to damage that relationship. When I spoke with them earlier in the week in our monthly "online get together" it was clear they value the relationship they have with me and I also realised they would not like her current business model as it goes against their ethics and that will put them off agreeing to work with her anyway.

So - deep breath - I countered their offer with mine and said I would do one month as a handover - and asked for proof of funding before we go any further and that if proof of funding cannot be provided we should pause until it can be. I also said my intention would be that the whole deal would be done by Christmas, that I have a solicitor waiting and am ready to proceed.

Email was very business-like and firm thanks to AI tidying up my exasperation and irritation. I did think it was a touch too firm when finished but sent it anyway. I've spent months waiting on her, and then writing lovely nice supportive emails but the bottom line is I do want out and I don't want to prevaricate anymore if she is not an option then I will make an alternative plan.

Watty1

And in other news planning determination date was yesterday. Only it has been extended. Planning officer emailed saying he needed management sign off and the council ecologist to review the plan again. Planning consultant says it is frustrating but the email is quite positive email but now more waiting until the end of the month. More limbo but this one has a date even if that date has been moved.