Watty's Awakening

PennysIntoPounds

Well that was an unexpected turn of events!
But look how amazing you were with being proactive in trying to get it sorted, by being brave and getting PPH to temporarily sort it, and by not procrastinating and already noting and moving your info so you and only you are in charge of your email and any fees you may wish to pay. Of course its irksome to know you've been paying for this account but now you'll have a nice shiny £7.50 a month extra to put towards something that will bring you joy 

Watty1

Thanks PiP.  I had not thought of it quite like that but it was all calmly resolved. I also resisted the temptation to mention anything of topic or ask how he was it anything like that so I’m happy with my outcome 

This evening I listened to a lovely webinar on manifesting.  Very though provoking but too long.  It did major on coming from a place of love and on taking action.   It helped me come to terms with things in the past so evening we’ll spent. 

Cherryfudge

Watty1 said:

an hour later he messaged me with a password that will allow me to access my emails.

This is bothering me - though it may be of no significance. Is there any data he may have drawn down in that hour and which now needs to be made secure? Of course, it may just have been that he was busy or had to look up the password.

Hopefully it's nothing.

Watty1

Cherryfudge said:

Watty1 said:

an hour later he messaged me with a password that will allow me to access my emails.

This is bothering me - though it may be of no significance. Is there any data he may have drawn down in that hour and which now needs to be made secure? Of course, it may just have been that he was busy or had to look up the password.

Hopefully it's nothing.

No need to worry. There was nothing on the email that would have sparked any interest.   I use my work email for most things since leaving him.   I had a hunch he could have accessed it but could not articulate why I thought that so clearly something in my brain knew the emails were linked.

During that hour he did message me saying he was "on hold" then that he had to phone somewhere else, then that he was on hold again and so I think he really did try to sort things out.   And coming from a place of kindness and love I'm just going to be grateful that, on getting my message, he immediately gave up a chunk of his time to help me.  He didn't have to.   Now, I could be cynical and say he couldn't resist the opportunity to put a hero cape on and help and show me that of course I cannot mange on my own - but - that way of thinking does not really serve me  and will get in the way of the universe helping me (I picked that up yesterday evening on the webinar).

So, given that the universe has helped me so much this year, I'm just going to be appreciative of the fact the emails are accessible and I have the next month to sort a proper solution.

Cherryfudge

I'm glad that's okay!

Watty1

Been awake since just before 3 am.  Finally got up for a cup of tea and a read on here.

I think the contact with the ex really has rattled me.  I'm not sure why but it has.  Plus worry over WattyDog and I probably need to make a list of the rest of the things bothering me as I'm sure there are more.  

KajiKita

Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’m kind of glad you are feeling rattled by your contact with the ex, especially the reason behind it. I was feeling rattled for you but didn’t want to project onto you so didn’t say anything when you first mentioned the email thing. 

If it were me, I would be doing a huge mind map (or whatever other free thinking technique works for you) to map out every possible connection ex had with my life or still could have. I would then make a list of things to check, confirm, clarify, make alternative arrangements for etc. Doing that would give me back the sense of agency separate to ex I suspect is feeling threatened in you atm. 

Sending hugs to you and gentle ear scritches to WD x

KK

greenbee

KK's idea is a good one. But don't forget that you dealt with it all calmly and pragmatically at the time, even if there is fallout later. You just got on and did it. You've removed PPH from so much of your life, and dealt with the big things, so identifying the little things will give you reassurance that there are no further links. 

I've just had to arrange some things with a third party provider where my ex works. My boss knows the history and is supportive of me doing this so that we avoid working with him, and in doing it in a way that doesn't require me to explain to colleagues why I'm choosing to work with different people. I still find it stressful when his name comes up as a suggestion though. 

daisy_1571

Seconding above posts.  

Like the sea, initial contact years ago was like waves breaking over you and tossing you around.   Gradually the seas have got quieter and more peaceful but this little squall has tossed you around again.  It will pass and you will regain equilibrium again.  Each squall is smaller, easier to cope with, quicker to dissipate. 

'Trigger stacking' means its unfortunate it happened at same time as wd but unfortunately stuff doesn't wait patiently to come at us one at a time.  Acknowledge the upset, work to minimise as above posts, you're NOT the same person any more, this will not affect you long term.

Hugs d xxx

Cherryfudge

Wise words above. This too will pass.