Has saving affected your mental health.

hugheskevi

Personally, I think the key point is whether saving causes an individual worry/stress/concern, etc, rather than being related to any concept of excessive saving.

In my experience, issues around excessive saving/insufficient expenditure tend to affect those who either grew up in households with very little or had very little at some point earlier in life. Whereas those who have never experienced this are far more comfortable with spending and debt (not bad debt, just carrying a large debt they can service).

However, just having an old car, mobile, or whatever, even when you can trivially afford much more is not an issue if it doesn't cause any angst. I think the wealthier you are, the less you are affected by how you think others may perceive you. Myself, I drive a battered, 11-year-old small car. That is because I live in London and my car is parked on the street and it is inevitable it will pick up small dents from careless drivers each year. When I move, I will buy something much nicer and better. I could go and spend tens of thousands on a car from savings now if I wished, but I do not wish to do that - I would get more irritated by having a nice car that someone inevitably scratches than I do having an old car that I don't care what happens to. But, I know if I was in the same position but without the money in the bank, I would feel much more embarrassed about driving such an old car.

I think it is very important to know what you are saving for. After a fairly low level (ie enough to comfortably cover precautionary savings and any large one-off things you might buy), it becomes by default to fund early retirement if it does not have a specific future purpose such as a house deposit. That is simply because the surplus will grow and grow, and eventually reach the point of financial self-sufficiency, which for many will be retirement (else continuing to work either because they like it, or just want to continue piling up assets). If so, then that leads to questions about using the surplus more efficiently, eg, pension or ISA investments.

MisterMotivated

hugheskevi said:

However, just having an old car, mobile, or whatever, even when you can trivially afford much more is not an issue if it doesn't cause any angst. I think the wealthier you are, the less you are affected by how you think others may perceive you. Myself, I drive a battered, 11-year-old small car. That is because I live in London and my car is parked on the street and it is inevitable it will pick up small dents from careless drivers each year. When I move, I will buy something much nicer and better. I could go and spend tens of thousands on a car from savings now if I wished, but I do not wish to do that - I would get more irritated by having a nice car that someone inevitably scratches than I do having an old car that I don't care what happens to. But, I know if I was in the same position but without the money in the bank, I would feel much more embarrassed about driving such an old car.

I agree with this to some extent, though concerns about perception can go both ways.

As I mentioned in my earlier posts, I like old cars.  Similar to you, I took comfort in knowing that if someone scratched or crashed into my last car, it wouldn't be a big deal as it wasn't worth a lot of money.  However, when things went wrong with it, they were usually noisy issues and I would be taken back to my youth, when the family car would break down a lot but we couldn't afford to replace it with something more reliable.  Also, while I saw what was underneath and appreciated its power and performance abilities, I regularly got comments from various acquaintances who just saw it as an old banger and couldn't fathom why I didn't drive something nicer.

Conversely, I have a friend who comes from a wealthy family.  We're both petrolheads and, like me, he prefers older cars.  However, he seems to despise the idea of driving a newer/nicer car on the basis that most of the people he associates with are working class and he doesn't want anyone to think of him as 'posh'.

AmityNeon

I experienced rather severe childhood trauma relating to my father. He was extremely shady, probably a gambler, a wheeler dealer sort, physically abusive, and always randomly going out to 'cash cheques' despite working as an aviation engineer for a well-known airline, not to mention his adulterous gallivanting. His way or the highway, he put his foot down and never allowed anyone to ask questions. One sudden night, he physically forced my mother to remortgage the house to the sum of an additional £80K, under the threat of loan sharks arranging a hit on our entire family. We (my mother and I) then fled and never returned. I still don't really know the full details to be honest.

As such, I've never allowed myself to be saddled with bad debt. It was quite a mental struggle even letting go of my mortgage deposit when buying my first property, as for years I had a large safety net of cash; I felt vulnerable despite still having emergency savings (although not quite six months). I've never been one to chase the latest technology (second-hand iPhone 7 with my old iPhone 6S as a backup/banking phone), and couldn't care less about designer labels. I still have clothes from when I was 16 that still fit middle-aged me, and they remain functional in terms of appearance and practicality; it doesn't bother me if people see me and make remarks that I always seem to wear the same few things.

As I've aged I've learned to loosen the purse strings. I've become more aware of my mortality, and I only have one life; my spouse encourages me to enjoy it whilst I still can. My health and physicality aren't what they used to be, and as the years go by, the more doors that close to new experiences. That being said, just because we can afford something doesn't mean that something is worth its asking price, so I'm still shrewd and scrupulous.

B0bbyEwing

jimexbox said:

I find spending rainy day savings hard because I have little interest in owning the latest anything. I'm happy with my 10 year old car and 3 year old phone. It's not a case of depriving myself, I just think if it fulfills what I need, why spend out on a new one. I will happily spend money on travelling and experiencing something new. As I've aged I know that material things don't actually make me happier. 

I can relate to this.

I must admit that I do like having new/latest items, such as phones. I'll see reviews when a phone lands & think - that's a nice feature, or that camera looks better than mine etc.

But as time has moved on, a new phone now is like £1000 give or take & not £500 anymore (which in itself isn't small change to me). 

Right now I have a Galaxy S20 (which I bought in 'Pristine' condition from Music Magpie which replaced my Galaxy S10 - also from Music Magpie (my last NEW phone was an iPhone 6S from Apple on release day)) and I've been looking at the Galaxy S23 because 1) it's newer 2) quicker 3) battery will be better 4) will get updates for longer (mine has stopped getting the latest version - downside of Android) 5) I prefer the screen shape as it doesn't have curved edges like the S20

BUT

my phone works. It does what I need it to do so do I really need to be spending £XYZ? No not really. Will it improve my phone-owning experience to the value of what I'd be spending? No not really, in fact not at all.

So I've decided to give myself a slap & say keep your phone until it's just about dead because it does the job.

I've turned 40 & right now my priority is to 1) set money aside for jobs that need doing on the house (new bathroom & then down the line new roof, new kitchen, garden sorted) but 2) Make retirement a BIG priority. Try & bring the date forward as much as possible because if I could retire today then I would. Some people need work to have something in life, even if it's just mingling with people. I'm not that person - work isn't for me, I don't 'need' other people, I need my family & that's it, I'm not interested in work or people outside of family tbh & so retirement (asap) is a priority for me.
And he only way I can do that is to maximise the money I set aside.

masonic

B0bbyEwing said:
Right now I have a Galaxy S20 (which I bought in 'Pristine' condition from Music Magpie which replaced my Galaxy S10 - also from Music Magpie (my last NEW phone was an iPhone 6S from Apple on release day)) and I've been looking at the Galaxy S23 because 1) it's newer 2) quicker 3) battery will be better 4) will get updates for longer (mine has stopped getting the latest version - downside of Android) 5) I prefer the screen shape as it doesn't have curved edges like the S20

Yes, it does irk me when I'm upgrading only because the phone has fallen out of support for security updates.

MisterMotivated

It's more irksome still when you consider that most people are paying a ridiculous amount just to get a slightly improved version of something they already have.

Sea_Shell

(hides her second hand £75 Moto G6 under a napkin)

😉🤭

boingy

masonic said:

B0bbyEwing said:
Right now I have a Galaxy S20 (which I bought in 'Pristine' condition from Music Magpie which replaced my Galaxy S10 - also from Music Magpie (my last NEW phone was an iPhone 6S from Apple on release day)) and I've been looking at the Galaxy S23 because 1) it's newer 2) quicker 3) battery will be better 4) will get updates for longer (mine has stopped getting the latest version - downside of Android) 5) I prefer the screen shape as it doesn't have curved edges like the S20

Yes, it does irk me when I'm upgrading only because the phone has fallen out of support for security updates.

My wife has just had to replace her 7 year old phone because WhatsApp needs a newer version of Android. She's an occasional WA user rather than an addict but it's the main comms channel for a smattering of old friends and a few family members. We both tend to keep things until they break so it's a bit irritating to change a perfectly working phone. I've seen a few posts on here about folks being forced to buy a new phone to keep their banking apps running. Imagine if you had to keep changing your front door every time Royal Mail updated their delivery service. 

In a world where everyone talks about reuse and recycling, phones have a built-in obsolescence. 

masonic

boingy said:

masonic said:

B0bbyEwing said:
Right now I have a Galaxy S20 (which I bought in 'Pristine' condition from Music Magpie which replaced my Galaxy S10 - also from Music Magpie (my last NEW phone was an iPhone 6S from Apple on release day)) and I've been looking at the Galaxy S23 because 1) it's newer 2) quicker 3) battery will be better 4) will get updates for longer (mine has stopped getting the latest version - downside of Android) 5) I prefer the screen shape as it doesn't have curved edges like the S20

Yes, it does irk me when I'm upgrading only because the phone has fallen out of support for security updates.

My wife has just had to replace her 7 year old phone because WhatsApp needs a newer version of Android. She's an occasional WA user rather than an addict but it's the main comms channel for a smattering of old friends and a few family members. We both tend to keep things until they break so it's a bit irritating to change a perfectly working phone. I've seen a few posts on here about folks being forced to buy a new phone to keep their banking apps running. Imagine if you had to keep changing your front door every time Royal Mail updated their delivery service. 

In a world where everyone talks about reuse and recycling, phones have a built-in obsolescence. 

It's often worse than that. Banking apps are usually happy to go on working long after the phone's operating system replete with security vulnerabilities and is unsafe to use for things like online banking. A phone I bought this year is apparently good until 2028, which is an improvement on the 2-3 years that is typical.

Imagine if you bought a front door with a defective locking mechanism that needed regular servicing, but the manufacturer only agreed to do so for a few years before they'd make you either buy a new door or risk leaving it unlocked when you go out.

Rich1976

B0bbyEwing said:

jimexbox said:

I find spending rainy day savings hard because I have little interest in owning the latest anything. I'm happy with my 10 year old car and 3 year old phone. It's not a case of depriving myself, I just think if it fulfills what I need, why spend out on a new one. I will happily spend money on travelling and experiencing something new. As I've aged I know that material things don't actually make me happier. 

I can relate to this.

I must admit that I do like having new/latest items, such as phones. I'll see reviews when a phone lands & think - that's a nice feature, or that camera looks better than mine etc.

But as time has moved on, a new phone now is like £1000 give or take & not £500 anymore (which in itself isn't small change to me). 

Right now I have a Galaxy S20 (which I bought in 'Pristine' condition from Music Magpie which replaced my Galaxy S10 - also from Music Magpie (my last NEW phone was an iPhone 6S from Apple on release day)) and I've been looking at the Galaxy S23 because 1) it's newer 2) quicker 3) battery will be better 4) will get updates for longer (mine has stopped getting the latest version - downside of Android) 5) I prefer the screen shape as it doesn't have curved edges like the S20

BUT

my phone works. It does what I need it to do so do I really need to be spending £XYZ? No not really. Will it improve my phone-owning experience to the value of what I'd be spending? No not really, in fact not at all.

So I've decided to give myself a slap & say keep your phone until it's just about dead because it does the job.

I've turned 40 & right now my priority is to 1) set money aside for jobs that need doing on the house (new bathroom & then down the line new roof, new kitchen, garden sorted) but 2) Make retirement a BIG priority. Try & bring the date forward as much as possible because if I could retire today then I would. Some people need work to have something in life, even if it's just mingling with people. I'm not that person - work isn't for me, I don't 'need' other people, I need my family & that's it, I'm not interested in work or people outside of family tbh & so retirement (asap) is a priority for me.
And he only way I can do that is to maximise the money I set aside.

Fully agree with all of this. The day office politics and the daily whinging about anything and other departments is no longer a feature in my life the better.
thats why I’m looking forward to the Christmas break because I don’t need to deal with people that I really have nothing in common with and wouldn’t choose to sit with every day if it was my decision.

so with the exception of home improvements, retirement is the goal and making that happen when we are ready and not just because we qualify for the state pension on a particular date.

does it effect mental health? Most definitely. We probably save more than most people do a month but it never feels enough especially with the cost of things going up. A bathroom upgrade set us back several thousand even though it was planned. We are saving up for a replacement car plus other home improvements. 

But day to day living does get in the way. Things breakdown, the car needed new tyres, our fence blew down and had to be replaced. All of which can be stressful as it uses funds which would otherwise be used towards nicer things.