Prosperous & Creative Soul & MFW Year 3

savingholmes

Thanks Jwil, TG, LWAP and @enthusiasticsaver

I finished early again today. I'd used up my concentration span.

My cleaner is a real find. I will totally miss her. I need to find a new one - but she's going to be hard to replace.

The handyman called round. He's promised to come a week tomorrow to take some stuff even if he has to use his car.  He'll also disconnect the washing machine and dryer for me to make them easier to move. Things tend to come apart in my hands when I try things like that - as I struggle to work out what level of grip I should use - or fail to budge stuff at all... It does mean I need to be on top of the washing before the move. Hopefully he will make it to my new house and help me there. He suggested whatever I don't want I toss in a box and he'll take it - along with the excess furniture etc. I'm really determined to limit how much excess stuff I shift to the new place.

I found a huge photo canvas of the kids today of when DD was 3-5 and DS around 8-10 which while very sweet and all - part of me is tempted to paint over - as I also found the small version yesterday which is a much more realistic size to keep long term for the age they are now. This is on top of a cute one I found of them yesterday which is more like A4 size. I've wrapped a few more canvases in special paper. Still need to bubble wrap them. Between me and my cleaner we've used 100m of bubble wrap already and there's a lot of big stuff left to wrap. I may end up ordering more. I've counted my box stack though and I had more left than I thought and the new ones have now arrived.

I think I've now wrapped everything that was under the bed in the fourth bedroom - but I have a horrible feeling there are pre-divorce extra large family photos and other similar things hidden under my bed which I also need to pack. I hid them there originally as I was worried Ex would just bin them and then I forgot about them. If I'm keeping them they need a better home after the move as the symbolism of that is poor!! However they are also the best photos of me and the kids and I don't believe you should erase decades of your life and pretend someone wasn't part of it. I think that the original photographer sent me the originals and I may be able to create a new photo collage which is more edited IF I want to display any of them in future... I can think about the latter post move - but need to clearly box and label any stuff like that - that I'm in no rush to see post move.

I've brought some more used and unused canvases in from the garage too that I now need to wrap. I totally under-estimated the impact of how many paintings I have on time needed for packing!! Thankfully I have also bought relatively hard canvas panels at various points which while painted on - could help provide a protective surface for some of my other canvases if I package them together a bit like a sandwich. I'll get there! One day.

savingholmes

LadyWithAPlan said:

12 days seems a lot before you move and you do seem far more organised than I ever am  

I find the worse things are what I think I need right up to the end then it’s chaos! 

If you can keep a free extra day  for after your move I find that best just so you have a clear window to kick start the unpacking 

In the past I've allowed nowhere near enough time - so now - especially as I'm doing this alone for the first time - other than the professional movers on the day - I'm trying to give myself longer.

I've booked the week of the move off - and arranged it on the Tuesday so I have at least 3 clear days before the move - the move day and then 5 days after the move before I'm due to work again. Even then I work mainly from home.  I'll add more to that if I need to - which I probably will as I'm currently finishing early every day rather than just having a day off. Work kind of breaks up the packing monotony.

Like you  say - I am over-estimating how much needs to stay out until the end - and I need to be more ruthless with myself - by packing the paintings behind where I sit for example... I'll start with all the other paintings first though before my bedroom and the lounge... I realised today - that although it's hard to take the pictures and ornaments down - taking them down is also part of letting go of this place so may almost help get my brain in gear... I'm still a bit nervous of packing things I'm really attached to before the exchange though as things could still go wrong - although there's no real reason to suggest that they will.

I take on board your earlier comment about eating too - and making life easier for myself. I may go for a cheeky n*nd0s.

savingholmes

TallGirl said:

Good luck with the packing I get you do not want to live in a mess and they do say it is best not to pack until you have exchanged but sounds like all is on track which must be so exciting. Can you approach any GP's now before you move so see if they will take it over or does it have to wait. Just thinking it is one less job to afterwards? Hope you get one sounds like the meds are really working so but I know what the NHS is like. 

I absolutely should do this and have shortlisted a name of a practice to try but that's as far as I've got. I have done the weight, BP and monitoring form though for the ADHD stuff and had a blood test earlier - so I've been doing some of that kind of life admin.

If I left it to exchange - I wouldn't be ready on time. This is a 4 bedroom house - and although I have got rid of loads since the divorce there is still a lot here.

enthusiasticsaver said:

Just caught up on the events of the last few months SH and good that your move  is going ok.  I think it must be tough doing it on your own and that will cause stress but you seem to be coping admirably.  

My SIL has just started taking ADHD medication and while helping him in some respects it has taken a bit of fine tuning to  get it right and the supply system  seems strange as he was diagnosed outside the NHS. Hopefully you will get it sorted but it is just one more thing which takes mental energy to think about.  I am sure once you are in your new house things will be a lot easier.

Your cleaner sounds brill.  When DH had his open heart surgery we looked for a cleaner round here as he was upset I was having to do everything but just could not find anyone who had space on their list.  They get snapped up so quickly. By the time we got a name of someone good he had recovered so we didn't bother in the end. 

I think the right cleaner makes a huge difference but the wrong one doesn't - and I've had some of the latter in the past. When I got divorced I realised I needed someone like I had - in that she is a cleaner, support person and handyman rolled into one. That's going to be hard to find. My handyman is a really warm, friendly individual too. Both were recommendations.

Glad the meds are helping your relative. I'm hoping things settle down for me post move. I'm pushing myself hard (by my standards) to let things go so that the new house will feel both a fresh start and spacious even though it's a slight downsize. Having realised that closed, opaque storage doesn't really work that well for me I've tried to let more of that go. Even where I have hidden storage - I like to have drawers or cubes that lift out so that I can then see at a glance what is inside and not get too overwhelmed.

Hope your DH has made a full recovery @enthusiasticsaver

Right I'm going to follow everyone's advice and go off and eat out!

Merlin's_Beard

savingholmes said:

Thanks Merlin.

This may seem like a list of excuses but...

I've asked my cleaner if she can help other days and she's promised to look at her calendar and let me know. I may need to rope in DD and her BF at the weekends. I won't remember where stuff is if I don't pack it. I want to leave some things until last like pictures and mirrors in the lounge and possibly my bedroom. What I am trying to do now - is find all the hidden things like stuff under furniture and either pack or dispose of that.

I also WFH most days - so need to leave my office set up until I finish work which is due to be the Friday before the Tuesday move unless I book extra days. There shouldn't be too much left to pack in there - a picture, toner cartridges, a couple of lamps - things like the printer I have no box for and it's on a wheeled unit at the moment so would probably want it to stay on that or the movers would have to do something with it. I'm not even convinced I could lift it. My desk top they'll have to use blankets or something for as it's super heavy and I can't lift it. The desk top is sat on cubed units so they're kind of ready packed.

I don't cope well with other people in my space - particularly if they are not known to me. Hence why I don't want packers - especially if they were male. I am also sensitive to mood - and therefore others that might be able to help could increase my stress levels if they bring stress and anxiety with them or if there's too much baggage attached. Some people would also judge me on my belongings or things I want to keep and wouldn't be able to resist commenting etc... or could be upset by things that turn up like old family photos etc. Some people would require a lot of instructions which defeats the purpose. My cleaner is great as she understands how I think and what's likely to matter to me. 

Most of what's left to pack is split into 5 camps
a) tools/things that are too large/heavy to pack
b) things in daily/regular use or that I feel I need round me for the comfort of familiarity until closer to the move date - or things like curtains which for security reasons I don't want to pack too soon
c) things that require decisions 
d) things I'd like the handyman to clear for me if he ever turns up. This includes a bike, 2 or 3 pieces of furniture and a lot of what is in the shed and some of what is in the garage.I may give him a call again tomorrow and see if he's likely to be able to come. Because of the bereavement his normal van isn't currently available. If he can't come, I'll just mark it as free / low cost on FBMP and hopefully get rid of it that way.
e) things like clothes and curtains that are easy to chuck into a zip bag closer to move out day.

Tonight due to the box shortage I've continued with mirror and picture and ornament bubble wrapping. It's very time consuming. I need to pack a picture from the family bathroom and then that room's pretty much done. Just has an empty metal rack in there and soap and lotion. I'm whittling down the smaller ornaments and pictures in the house that would be less missed. I'm still in declutter mode so also looking at what can be binned or donated as I go which others can't do for me and which would then increase the load at the other end. 

Luckily my bins are due to be emptied the day before the move so I should be able to get rid of most of what can't be donated via my bins which is good. Last time I moved we were still packing after we should have been out. Definitely trying to learn from that and be way ahead of the game.

I've got a room by room list that in theory I'm working to. DD's wardrobes are now completely empty for example and I just need to remove a couple of boxes from DS's wardrobe and then his room is virtually done other than his curtains which I'm leaving until later. The airing cupboard is now empty... In the 4th bedroom I think the cleaner has removed everything from under the bed - I'll check - but that still leaves some paintings, lamps, mini tables and a huge craft crate in the wardrobe.

As long as you're doing what's best for you, then that's the best way to do it. But definitely if you can think of an easier way, I'd take it. Moving is hell!

savingholmes

Well the meal was nice. I nipped out and bought myself a vision board kit I'd given someone for xmas - now reduced to £3.50 and a canvas pad as my niece and nephews used up mine on their last visit. I then thought I'd brave looking under my bed!! One of DS's fave books when he was little was about a creature that grew from all the things under the bed - a whole world even - I keep rebuying it - and yet the irony of my own 'under bed' situation was lost on me - although TBF that's part of why I'm considering an ottoman frame at the new place...

I found my wedding album and looked through it. Glad I opened the box as it also had the kids school pictures and around an 8 week or so scan of DS when he was still in the womb so that evened things out. I found another box that had a real mix of stuff in it. Ex's exam certificates, birth certificate, 25th wedding anniversary cards etc.  I've binned all the cards. I've made a pile of stuff to give to the Ex via DD which includes some photos of his Dad who died shortly after we were married. I found some of DS's treasures - so have moved those to a box of his stuff. I also found a whole 'floating' shelf that we'd just put under the bed when we took it down - 10 or more years ago?? I found a pair of crocs I'll run through the dishwasher. They are suitably paint spattered but very dusty and spider webby.

The framed photo set I was looking for wasn't there and I'm now wondering if I gave it Ex at the time as one of the photo's was my favourite ever photo of him and DD. I found a photo from that time in a garage cupboard but the glass was missing from the frame. I found a family photo we spent £1K on in our high debt years under the sofa. It's already bubble wrapped thankfully so pretty much good to go. I also found some see through art shelves under the sofa so they could be useful at the new place. I have some others in the garage which I need to make sure I take with me. Apparently it's not just under the bed that new worlds could be created!!

I found 4 vision boards under the bed - including one that was unused. I was quite amused as I'd bought coloured ones but only used the white side. I won't need new ones to go with my little card and workbook kit I bought. One board in particular from 2012 had a lot of sayings on it that could equally apply to now. I've not made a lot of tangible progress today - but maybe I needed the break. The vision boards can be used to help protect painted canvases so they were a good find just from that perspective.

Need to make myself wrap some more paintings... Will get a coffee and some chocolate first!

beanielou

I don't have my wedding album!

lucielle

Glad you enjoyed the meal. I hope you’ve got enough walks to hang your pictures up!  

L

savingholmes

beanielou said:

I don't have my wedding album!

What struck me was how young and hopeful we were. Plus the people in the photos particularly on his side who had since died. I have too much of a history background to destroy the album but my kids aren't very sentimental so maybe one day they will. That day has my best photo ever of me and my dad... 

savingholmes

lucielle said:

Glad you enjoyed the meal. I hope you’ve got enough walks to hang your pictures up!  

L

Thanks Lucielle. I'd need a gallery to have enough wall space. At some point I want to try and sell some and I appreciate them all the more for having put some away for a while.

KajiKita

Well done for tackling under the bed! Sounds like a huge volume of both memories (and dust!) to work your way through. 

Glad you enjoyed your dinner too 😊 Hoping you slept okay last night. 

KK