Money Moral Dilemma: Should I give my cheating ex his half of a council tax refund?

Ringo90

Danien said:

How much did him cheating on you causing a break up cost you? When it happened to me there was huge financial and emotional cost which the ex certainly did not pay towards.

This. My ex decided to leave me and flee the country all of a sudden. No realt fault of my own, he just didn't want to be with me and in this country anymore. Did he ask himself if I could pay the flat we were renting together by myself? Or how much it would cost me to move out if couldn't, considering we had just renewed the contract without him mentioning his intentions? Or did he ask himself if I could care about the cat we adopted together by myself, both in terms of money and effort? And then there's all the emotional distress. There is no moral court that will ever repay you for such a thing, £89 is NOTHING compared.

Brisbaneroad

It's his money. And we've only heard one side of the story. You may have given him cause to play away from home. 

gloriouslyhappy

Brisbaneroad said:

It's his money. And we've only heard one side of the story. You may have given him cause to play away from home. 

Victim blaming or what!!! You are making a lot of assumptions based on nothing. The dilemma is about the money, not about the circumstances of the breakup. 

JessieBella

LightFlare said:

If they had said you owed £179 would you be expecting him to pay half ?

Ask yourself though, even if you did ask him to pay half, would he actually do it? I'm going to say No. It's not like half of 179 is a life-changing amount and it's not his name on the bill anyway.

Ringo90

Brisbaneroad said:

It's his money. And we've only heard one side of the story. You may have given him cause to play away from home. 

Of course, this is very mature, when things go wrong in a relationship just go and "play away from home" rather than discussing it or breaking up. That's how you deal with things as an adult, yeah?

JReacher1

I would keep my half and donate his half to charity. 

MRom

No. But if you feel guilty, donate to a charity of your choice.

NikNak67

I would take the high ground and give him his share.  If he had received the refund I would expect my share from him.

letthemeatcake

If the account was in his name wouldn't he also receive a letter from the council? So he'd possibly know all about it anyway. 

My partner continued to pay the council tax up until the April, even though he'd moved out 6 months beforehand. His ex still living in the property claimed retrospective single persons discount and kept the lot. He only found out when it showed up on her bank statements during financial disclosure. So i'd say be nice and share it.