An in-between phase

PennysIntoPounds

Thank you @beanielou.
I think I'm having extra trouble processing it as he was the healthiest, fittest, most chilled person anyone ever knew. It's just absolute madness to have outlived him. It's madness that anyone has outlived him. My emotions feel like a little child going 'but I don't understand'.
There wasn't even any cancer of any type in his family at all so I can't even go 'well these genetic predispositions lurk and its a reminder to make the most of your time and enjoy it', I just don't understand

beanielou

PennysIntoPounds said:

Thank you @beanielou.
I think I'm having extra trouble processing it as he was the healthiest, fittest, most chilled person anyone ever knew. It's just absolute madness to have outlived him. It's madness that anyone has outlived him. My emotions feel like a little child going 'but I don't understand'.
There wasn't even any cancer of any type in his family at all so I can't even go 'well these genetic predispositions lurk and its a reminder to make the most of your time and enjoy it', I just don't understand

I get this  I really do.  I had a family member die in their early forties.  He was just a bit older than me.  He was the healthy fit one who did all sorts of activies.  One moment he was here & then just gone just like that.
That side of the family which was small gone within a few years.  Anyway, I hear you.

KajiKita

I don’t have any wise words but sending hugs and Nil Carborundum Illegitimus! about the poxy broker … 🙄

KK

foxgloves

I get it too, PiP. One of my two very best friends died suddenly a few years ago. She was 53 - she was very fit, didn't drink much, never smoked or did drugs, walked everywhere, went to the gym twice a week & didn't have any degenerative illnesses. It makes it a lot harder to come to terms with the loss when, as you say, the understanding of the situation is missing.
F x

Watty1

I hear you.    The unexplained sudden deaths are so hard to process.  

PennysIntoPounds

Thank you my dear chums. I'm sorry for everyone else's losses too. 
Good thing I'm not particularly fit and healthy, seems to be very bad for you.
My brain was making up sad songs in my dreams so hopefully a bit of lamenting has helped the mourning process.

Our friends are away looking after their friends house so we're going to go and stay at theirs for a couple of nights to have a mini holiday (in South London). Keeping an eye on emails in case any last minute pick-ups needed on the client job then Mr PIP will drive us over this afternoon. 
Then some beers at one of our favourite pubs then a nice Italian in one of our favourite restaurants.
There are things to enjoy and achieve so I'd better bloody go and enjoy and achieve them whether I like it or not!

doingitanyway

IMHO it isn't understandable. It is entirely nonsensical and random...

KajiKita

Hope you're enjoying the change of scenery? (I like the idea of this kind of baton relay of house sitting - a very civilised way of going on )
#jealousyoftheitalianmeal ....  

There are things to do; both enjoy and achieve, but you need to be kind to yourself too. You are allowed to find it hard. It's been one heart-blow after another lately for you.

KK 

PennysIntoPounds

Thanks @KajiKita.
Saves us all a fortune on accommodation to swap gaffs occasionally for a change of scenery. Italian was closed unfortunately but we'll just have to come back!

Finished some books, ate and drank nice things, slept lots. Back up t'North London later then going to continue being chilled and not making myself do anything productive and eat and drink more nice things. Mr PIP off to a family wedding tomorrow, decided since I've never met the people getting married we'd save on train fares by me not going. Got best friends who were also close with ex husband coming round for drinks and reminiscing tomorrow instead.

Then hopefully starting the working week in a productive manner.
Need to sort out paying builder who's having a panic about not having money to pay for supplies despite having invoiced us out of contract agreement.
Need to chase broker for valuer agreement of actual measurement, then see if any alterations need to be done to offer. Then approach Community Infrastructure Levy team and see what the damage is and find money for that.
And everything else on the list!

But first, beer and pasta and being a lazy a*se.
Hope everyone is having a good weekend 🍻

Sun_Addict

Happy Saturday- enjoy the 🍺 and 🍝