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Hypothetically, yes. In reality my child benefit won't be paid until the 19th (£96) , and my child maintenance around the 24th (£109). I get actual paid on the 26th. Having checked this has just revealed I have £6 in our joint account though, woo. Husband had £20 left in his account so topped up the van this morning - just under half a tank, so hopefully if £50 clears from Vinted by Friday, I can pay my phone bill (£11) and put £40 in the van for him to get the kids. Essentially, if I hadn't have had the festival overspends, there would be money in the budget, but there isn't. Lesson learned. Have reduced price of tv, and still no other bites. Just keep waiting...stymied said:If you have 210 + 130 left in the budgets does that mean you have income due soon as that money’s not currently in the bank? Fingers crossed the money arrives before the fuel runs out.
I would have said no too - that was beyond cheeky of your tv buyer!
I can only keep faith that things will get better with husband. Yesterday he picked little one up from school and instead of going home, he took her to the park, and then they went to throw rocks in the river. So although it's not a big thing, it was nice for me that they got to hang out together and bond a bit while I was in work. Lots of little things, including bringing down the coffee cups and making the bed before we leave have also occurred, so I'm hopeful that its starting properly.slm6002 said:I'm glad that you have had time to relax a little. The sea sounds very nice. You shouldn't feel guilty about the off KFC, you don't have much for yourself.
I'm also glad that you have seen and recognised how single life would be, and have had another talk with XH. Lets hope he makes some changes
Hi, welcome aboard the SS Everything is F******. I was referring to my stepdaughter, not my sister in law. My sister in law is one of the most fiercly together people I have ever met and I am in awe of her. My stepdaughter is 19 and thinks that a good idea for a roommate is to invite random men who are in their late 20s, that she's met online and never in person, to come and live with her - and would rather pay full rent and have a roommate that she doesn't know than only pay bills and live alone - hence calling her naive. I tried to point out how dangerous that was, and was told that she would just ring her dad. Who lives at best an hour and a half away, if there's no traffic. As a survivor of sexual assault... the amount of damage that can be done in that time frame is unreal.LouisaAlmighty said:I'm really sorry and I mean this in the nicest way... But I'm really not sure how you can call your sister in law naive. I think you are very much head in the sand about your own situation.
Maybe you should try read this diary from the very start as if you were an outsider looking in.
Being mortgage free which you are is something that people dream their whole life of! You have been for a long time and you are still in the situation you are in. I think you still haven't really had your light bulb moment.
I wish you all the best and will follow but I think you really need to take a look at everything xx
Hi lovely, how funny to think that we are so close! Out of all the diaries on this site, I end up speaking to someone that is nearby haha. I think the vinted listings took about 4 hours? I did all the photographs in one go, including a photo of the label that shows the size, then I sit down and list them all in batches. It's tremendously boring, but it's basically free money & I get to declutter at the same time. I must have sold about.... 200 items on there? Maybe more? I have 168 reviews, but some of those were bundle deals. I have 103 things listed at the moment, and I have still more to put on. I was going to do it yesterday, but ended up spending the evening watching Ocean documentaries with my daughter, then on the phone to my best friend for the rest of the night. Was quite nice to have a night "off". xxMeandO said:I think you did the right thing with the TV buyer F&F, he was trying it on. Other buyers will come along.
It sounds like you had a nice weekend at the country park and beach (you're also really close to me too!). I'm glad you had the discussion with your husband, hopefully some of it sinks in.
Well done on the Vinted listings too, 80 must have taken you ages! I listed 2 yesterday and that was enough... Could hubby start listing things for you in the day perhaps? One job less for you to do.
Please don't feel guilty about the takeaway, you work hard for everyone else and get very little back. You deserve a treat now and then. xx
This is such a good idea. I have erasable pens that I write shopping lists/meal plans on the fridge with - I will try and write a to do list as well and see if it gets me any joy. Thank you! He is entirely capable but I have made a rod for my own back by trying to be a proper housewife and take over all the chores when we got together, and now the habits are quite deeply ingrained. The house isn't even that much of a disaster zone, because I've been decluttering pretty consistently for the last few years, but it is the daily maintenance that is just such a grind. Even if he would peg the laundry out when its finished in the machine, it would speed things up!CRANKY40 said:Maybe leave him indoors a list of what needs doing before you go to work? If you market it as a joint list of what needs doing each particular day he can choose a few jobs that will free up some of your time to list stuff and make money? My amazingly intelligent late husband never noticed dust or chaos in our house. He was quite happy to be left with a daily job list and anything that he didn't fancy/hadn't done we sorted together once I was home. The late MrC worked on big grey ships so was away four months then home for three so for four months at a time all jobs were mine anyway.
I'm currently working on my 18 year old "House Troll" who was accustomed to seeing me do most things (he was 4 when his dad died) but is increasingly willing to do things for me as I become less able.
I think a lot of us are guilty of this. I definitely am and have certainly built a rod for my own back. MrM asks for a list of things that need doing but then I get reactive asking why he doesn't just open his eyes instead of need telling to do like a child. I have come to the conclusion for me it's beacuse my only point of reference was my own Mum and MrM's Mum, who both incidentally didn't work or only part time (my Mum did 1 & 1/2 days in M&S) so were home to keep "house" instead of most of us who now have to work many more hours to pay the bills but still have done the majority of the childcare, shopping, cooking and cleaning.foxandflowers said:This is such a good idea. I have erasable pens that I write shopping lists/meal plans on the fridge with - I will try and write a to do list as well and see if it gets me any joy. Thank you! He is entirely capable but I have made a rod for my own back by trying to be a proper housewife and take over all the chores when we got together, and now the habits are quite deeply ingrained. The house isn't even that much of a disaster zone, because I've been decluttering pretty consistently for the last few years, but it is the daily maintenance that is just such a grind. Even if he would peg the laundry out when its finished in the machine, it would speed things up!CRANKY40 said:Maybe leave him indoors a list of what needs doing before you go to work? If you market it as a joint list of what needs doing each particular day he can choose a few jobs that will free up some of your time to list stuff and make money? My amazingly intelligent late husband never noticed dust or chaos in our house. He was quite happy to be left with a daily job list and anything that he didn't fancy/hadn't done we sorted together once I was home. The late MrC worked on big grey ships so was away four months then home for three so for four months at a time all jobs were mine anyway.
I'm currently working on my 18 year old "House Troll" who was accustomed to seeing me do most things (he was 4 when his dad died) but is increasingly willing to do things for me as I become less able.
