Energy Price Cap announcement: Watch Martin Lewis explain what it means for your electricity and gas bills this winter

Money Moral Dilemma: Is it fair for my parents to penalise me for not having children?

edited 25 October 2022 at 6:11PM in Deaths, funerals & probate
176 replies 93.4K views


  • sammyjammysammyjammy Forumite
    6.9K Posts
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper Photogenic
    Life is not fair, suck it up!  It is their money and they can do what they want with it.  
    "You've been reading SOS when it's just your clock reading 5:05 "
  • PmattPmatt Forumite
    29 Posts
    Part of the Furniture 10 Posts Combo Breaker
    Perhaps your parents could either provide a specific amount of payment to all grandchildren and include similar relationships. They could then provide an equal share of the remainder between their own children and allow their direct dependants to decide how to disperse their remaining inheritance. This is always a potential issue where there is multiple issue on one side of the family and fewer on another side.
  • bikagabikaga Forumite
    123 Posts
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts
    If your nephews/nieces are likely to be grown-ups when your parents pass then it makes total sense for them to get something straight away and not have to wait for your brother to die to pay off student loans or put down a deposit for a house. Times are hard, it's nice of your parents to want to help the young generation with a good start in life.

    If, however, you were really struggling financially and your brother wasn't, then it would make sense to support you a bit more relatively speaking. Hard to tell without knowing a bit more.

    And we don't even know if we're talking about say £5k each or a number of properties and lots of cash!

    But either way, calling it a punishment sounds like there's some background we don't know. Assuming there's a lot to be passed around - what would you do with it anyway? Burn it so your brother's kids don't get it? :neutral:
  • TheCraigClanTheCraigClan Forumite
    19 Posts
    Fifth Anniversary 10 Posts
    Maybe the fact that the question is being asked by the OP in the first place is the reason the inheritance is being split four ways... Ha.
  • Judes123Judes123 Forumite
    14 Posts
    Second Anniversary 10 Posts
    Our wills are to share our money between our children 2 marriages each). In the event of our children pre- deceasing us.. their share goes to their children
  • 400ixl400ixl Forumite
    1.6K Posts
    1,000 Posts First Anniversary Name Dropper
    People jumping to conclusions that the will itself will not be written as an equal share between any children and grandchildren who survive the parents / grandparents. 

    Personally do not see any issue with the way they are doing it. As people live longer we may well see more of inheritance skipping generations as the children will already be well set up and even close to retirement themselves.
  • onomatopoeia99onomatopoeia99 Forumite
    6.8K Posts
    Ninth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    It's their money, they can do what they want with it.

    That said, I would not do what they have done.  I'd look at each child and ensure that their family got the same in total, so, brother 1 gets half, brother 2 a sixth, his children 1 and 2  a sixth each.

    Proud member of the wokerati, though I don't eat tofu.Home is where my books are.Solar PV 5.2kWp system, SE facing, >1% shading, installed March 2019.
  • gothvixengothvixen Forumite
    25 Posts
    Second Anniversary 10 Posts
    If you did have a child, they would split it between 5 and you'd be down to 20%. You aren't receiving less than your brother and should be grateful for whatever they leave you.
  • Ian_KelseyIan_Kelsey Forumite
    3 Posts
    Fifth Anniversary First Post
    Grumbling over not getting as much money out of your parents as you'd like when they're dead. Nice! 
Sign In or Register to comment.
Latest MSE News and Guides

Energy Price Cap change

Martin Lewis on what it means for you

MSE News

Best £1 you've ever spent?

Share your most impressive bargains

MSE Forum