Moving on with things

alt80

Since I last posted on here we have had our budget reset and paid an additional £3.6k off the cards and closed another account. I haven’t been very well, Friday was a write-off for work, today still not been well but am a little better at least bit of work done but mainly time with my little family. It’s a reminder I need to start looking after myself a bit better, still too much stress and lack of sleep in my life and I don’t really eat very well. Been struggling with exercise too. Will get there but been a reminder working until I’m exhausted all the time tends to lead to me getting unwell, always tried to tell myself it’s just being paranoid but I think the body just says ‘no’ probably is an accurate description. Been a few unproductive days really but rather that than a few days fuelled by drugs.

@SusieT thank you one of the upsides to not being well I did manage to take and pick up my boy from school yesterday and we have managed to do a few quieter things together. 

@enthusiasticsaver ha, I am working towards being in a more resilient position, not be reliant on significant amounts of credit and the financial commitments that brings. Especially not for things that don’t enable returns. I’m still not adverse to debt as a tool in the right circumstances but being in significant amounts of debt for personal lifestyle reasons is, was and will always be !!!!!! idiotic. I couldn’t get my head around the idea of building 3-6 months of savings that are just that, not reinvested / spent. I understand now my head is clear and want to work towards having a much more financially resilient position both personally and in business. 100% when I’ve built up that 6 months income over a couple of ISA accounts I’ll start investing in something that provides a greater return, it would be nice to have interests outside of property at some point. First thing is to carry on getting these card accounts to a balance of £0 and getting them closed. 

@Iamouttheotherside thank you. Your name and what you say re skills built whilst paying off debt not leaving makes me assume you know what it’s like and haven’t gone back, if I’m right well done. I have a couple of decent rewards cards, although whether they are the best out there now or not, I’m not sure. Anyhow in essence we do what you do, all day to day spending on the card, pay that off in full each month these days. Cash back on business credit card is better than personal I’ve found.

Not a bad idea re utilising ISA and paying off the cards over a longer period if I can get a couple of decent 0% deals for when the current lot run out tbf bit of food for thought there, thanks. Never looked into premium bonds tbh but tax free sounds good to me ha had to smile at HMRC ‘pacman’. Wife and I have 100% transparency with each other not always been the case but is now.

You are right re the realisation of how close we were to losing everything tbh I’m not just talking about financially either.

@katsu we are giving a small sum each month. The world isn’t an easy place and it’s good to think we might be helping in a small way for others to get something off the ground and generate further income for their families. Thank you again for telling me about it.

enthusiasticsaver

Well done on paying off a further £3.6k off the cards and closing one down.  Getting ill and feeling drained is a sign you need more downtime. I am a great believer in eat well, exercise well, work hard and play hard. Stress also plays its part in causing you  to feel unwell and sleep badly. 

lucielle

Great news on the card. How many more have you to go?  Don’t answer if too personal. Sounds like you need a bit more me/family time. 

L

RelievedSheff

Excellent news on  paying down the card. That's great going.

Listen to your body. Let it tell you when you have had enough and need a break.

alt80

Bit late in the day to wish you all a happy Sunday but hope you had a nice weekend. Today has been quiet, feeling a lot better, got out for lunch, dog walk and a few bits of work / personal admin done. Ready to start the week and new month (already). Had too much sleep over the past few days so just heading to bed now, will get it right one day ha. 

@enthusiasticsaver thank you, all steps in the right direction. Sometimes easy to reflect on the past when I’m dealing with paying the cards down. You are right about the downtime, tbh it’s not my business that’s to blame, it’s my inability to put things down and switch off for a bit that leads to making myself ill. Always denied stress being a contributing factor in serious illness but I’ve read enough reputable articles / books to understand I really need to get it under control - want to be able to enjoy as much time with my family as possible.

Your life philosophy sounds good to me and is what the pros try to instil in people like me in recovery. Know it’s important and even more important when stressed, unfortunately gets harder to realise when feeling like that. Aiming for a more balanced week this one coming. Day you give up working on things in spite of setbacks becomes a spiral back into bad habits for me so I can’t give up.

@lucielle Thank you. I still owe just over £50k over four cards in total. I managed to get the amount owed down by a significant amount before I relapsed. That did me no favours financially whatsoever and just to kick my when I was already down my medical insurance didn’t cover me getting treatment. I’ve been too ashamed to go into details about how much debt I was in again when I made the first post on here again, tbh knowing I needed to get this sorted once and for all was one of the reasons why I moved my old car on and had another electric car through my business. It wasn’t the only reason but the finance, petrol and other running costs have allowed me to make bigger inroads into sorting the mess out again. 

@RelievedSheff Thank you, it’s a great feeling to be on the right track to saying goodbye to the last of the card debt and although easy to reflect on the past, each payment puts me a little further away from it also. I’m going to beat this and this time I’m not going to turn back I know this time is different, I’ve put a lot of distance between myself and others that were damaging to my recovery and whilst it shouldn’t be about someone else I knew I didn’t want to turn back when my wife agreed to therapy. We are renewing our vows this year, it means so much to me this time to say those words for the right reasons. I’m ranting on now but each payment and card closed is an achievement for me. I’ve continually had significant amounts of personal debt.

You are right about listening to your body I am still very much on a learning curve with that and getting that balance.

lucielle

You sound so focused!  Sounds like you had a good time on Sunday. 

L

alt80

@lucielle I did thank you! I am very much focused. Fed up !!!!!! things for my family.

RelievedSheff

Are you renewing your vows in Greece or over here?

Sarahwithlove

Renewing your vows is a lovely idea and I'm glad you are in a place where this is an option for you both. 

alt80

@RelievedSheff in Greece. Will only be very small although my parents seem keen to make a fuss so I’ve no doubt that evening they and their friends will cook enough food to feed an army.

@Sarahwithlove thank you, over the latter part of last year and this year so far we are closer than we have ever been. Difficult times either drive you apart or bring you together.