Moving on with things

Cherryfudge

I'm sorry you've had a dire day. Perhaps you are telling yourself that now is not the time to start a new project, especially if it's one that needs adrenaline.

There's no law that says you have to pay off the rest of the card just yet, but it's possible that as you are so close to the end of it, you might be avoiding what probably feels like a cliff edge. There are all sorts of ways you could tackle that, on a sliding scale from not making that last payment and doing as you describe to paying it all off as planned. Between those options are all the variations of paying off a percentage and putting a percentage into savings. Other options might be to make a Christmas payment to the charity that you support, or to something local where you know people will benefit, or having another few days away if that helps you sleep.

If you keep the card open, would you be tempted to use it again?

alt80

@Cherryfudge Idk if it’s something I ever want to do again tbh. I used to love it although when I look back now I know how close I came to losing everything over taking on risky projects that if I’m honest were bad decision making on my part. I just don’t have that tolerance for risk anymore and it breaks me. It spills into other areas of business and why I’m basically just treading water- not moving anywhere. I’m not complaining as things are ok but I know that I am working from a place of preservation rather than growth because I’ve just lost my appetite for it. I know that’s not right at my age and I should be striving for more for my family. 

Re the card I’m just possibly looking for an excuse because it is a cliff edge. I cannot remember a time when I have had no personal debt save for a mortgage and elements of personal guarantee attached to investment property which is another reason I basically have hardly any appetite for risk any longer. 

warby68

Business wise @alt80, you may well just be experiencing the other extreme as you are prone to with all things. The middle ground may well emerge here with more time. There is nothing wrong with 'treading water' for a while either, usually referred to as a 'period of consolidation' but you do actually have a strategy, one of derisking/de-gearing, at the moment and nothing wrong with that either. The stronger the business the better placed you will be for new projects in the future. You still have time - there is no need (I know you can't help it right now) to feel so broken by being more risk averse - these are very uncertain times for most sectors, including property. You are diversified to an extent but I feel property as a whole has more risk than it ever has. The new government certainly isn't helping (understatement).

RelievedSheff

Sorry you had a bad day Alt.

There really is nothing wrong with becoming more risk adverse as you get older and wiser.

in_need_of_direction

putting on my day job hat, i would see your shift in risk appetite as according with the shift in your objectives.  i may be wrong but my thoughts are that in the previous career stage, the aim was more.  now the aim is future stability and risks should always be considered in the context of what you are trying to achieve.  you may find in future that your risk appetite expands when you have achieved a comfortable level of security.  either way, you find enough to worry about without worrying about this.  take care

mark55man

That's not a bad thought about the cards vs interest basically stoozing - what I would take from it is you have options -  and either or both at the same time will work.  Its just  sometimes its just which ones suits your mood.  Your improved financial position gives you choices so don't worry about them just decide one way or the other and it will be fine

alt80

Not been a great day today either, did get a bit more than 3 hours sleep though at least.

@Cherryfudge re card, no I wouldn't be tempted to spend on it. Beyond Lapland which wasn't budgeted / accounted for and means income that should be reinvested being pulled over these coming few months I have not spent off budget. My wife still wants this Cartier necklace and I've just told her no. Hate myself for having to. It probably sounds really !!!!!! odd but I simply just don't identify (for want of a better word - it's been a long day!) as someone who financially !!!!!! themselves buying stuff off plan using credit anymore. 

@warby68 on my better days I actually feel quite proud of myself that I am working towards the longer game, on the worse days I'm just reminded of the more negative stuff. Unfortunately, whilst I struggle to come to terms with the past I also am overly worried about the future especially my wife's and son's future. I wasn't like this at all pre-Covid, all I can say is it's !!!!!! horrible having had every last scrap of confidence in yourself taken away.

I agree with you re property rn. I've never really known it this uncertain, personally speaking there, 2008 was awful for so many but my business was very much in its infancy so we just had a crack at everything. The buzz was absolutely incredible. Best years of my life up to about 2015/16 until I just went !!!!!! mental, and haven't really been well since.

@RelievedSheff idk fwiw I'm satisfied that the project didn't stack having looked at the numbers again today. I feel I've got a lot to lose these days.

@in_need_of_direction I 100% see where you're coming from and agree from a point of view that discounts my personal interests and considers it from an independent standpoint. I know there's a lot !!!!!! wrong with me ha.

@mark55man I know I'm winding myself up over very little with the card balance, it is !!!!!! ridiculous being anxious about having no card balances which is, if I'm honest, why I'm trying to talk myself out of just paying the thing off.   

Sarahwithlove

If it gives you peace of mind and reduces anxiety could you just set a DD for the remaining balance spread over the 0% period and then save the rest. 

alt80

Managed to have a little better day, up at this time after failing to fall asleep though I have got some cold bug. It’s been a little quieter at work so I managed to book our AF Christmas lunch. It’s something that I really look forward to. I still pay for my staff to have a night out too but I leave them to it. Going to leave the office early tomorrow so my wife and I can have lunch together and start our Christmas shopping.

@Sarahwithlove I’d probably give someone else similar advice but I just want it gone and my reasoning for prolonging it is driven by irrational anxiety because I can’t really remember a time without having a card balance. That is just dumb and I know it. 

I want to stick to my plan which will mean this time next week I will be free of the card debt and will have not let my poor mental health get in the way of what I’ve chosen to do.

Lonelygambler

Progress not perfection. 

I’ve found that so useful with my recovery journey. 

Well done on clearing those cards LG