NST JOYFUL JUNE

beanielou

@f0xh0les.  That's a mighty big increase.

apple_muncher

f0xh0les said:

Tattoos of what @apple_muncher ?

My cunning plan is wedding rings, or rings of some sort, as we never wear our real ones. In fact we nearly didn't have any for the wedding, and I nipped to arg0s the day before to grab rings in more or less the right sizes, so we actually had some on the day 🤣🤣🤣.

My cousin suggested something like a Celtic intertwining ring, as yellow isn't much cop, and tattoos on fingers tend to get smudgy. So she says!

Either that, or permanent marker...

mothernerd

That's enough rowdiness, honestly I turn my back for 5 minutes and you all go around breaking bits of yourself, contracting plague and guzzling cake.

Idee congrats on the school appeal

abundant Yes you may be depressed but that's when it's most important to eat 'proper' food, avoid caffeine, particularly after noon as it disrupts your sleep pattern. Look after yourself, nourish (and cherish0 your body, mind and brain. It's okay to mope on the sofa once in a while but don't set up camp there. You also sound a bit bored, so as well as all the practical stuff, schedule some things to look forward to. Well done on the NSD.

f0xh0les They made me convert - I had to sing the Welsh rugby anthem. Allow yourself to 'adjust' to the new look headstone, the old image will fade and be replaced by the 'now'.

firsview I hope you get better soon but if your body says it needs longer don't rush. Many people have talked about it taking several weeks to recover properly and others who have rushed have relapsed later.

ditty I think I proved at the weekend that there's always 'another way'. Injuries are always disruptive but use this as an opportunity. Remember the 5 'D's Do, Delay, Delegate, Drop, Diminish.

apple You make a fuss about pinning people and the next minute you're 'stuffing elephants'. I'm agin the tattoo idea - they're so commonplace and mainstream now, it's more rebellious Not to have one.

Deni Were you near Denbigh, huddled under a series of white gazebos - if you were we drove past you.

cuddlymarm You are a kind host.

Toni'sfriend It was one of the rules in one of Kat's challenges but I noticed she had spent nearly £19 on makeup the previous month. Like the store cupboard challenges, it's a good idea to look at toiletries from time to time, see if you have anything you could use as a substitute or if there are things lurking that never see the light of day.

Thank you all for your good wishes. The weekend was lovely, the funeral was a true celebration of his life, DS2 did a wonderful speech and then broke down a bit near the end (he carried on). I paid for my pre-booked breakfasts (£10 instead of £14.95) on arrival and the massage later on but other people have paid for my food and drinks (it was mostly fizzy water) all weekend and it was interesting to see some stories from the other side (including a very positive spin the ex had put on an early sexual encounter). 

The hydrotherapy pool was wonderful, I sat on the steps at first (the signs indicated it would be deeper than it was) and then went to the bubbles side (a bit boisterous but very good for my shoulders and legs). Could do lots of movements I can't 'on land'. One of the therapists hadn't turned in for work so I could only have 1/2 an hour in the pool in order to fit the massage in - half an hour in the pool was enough for me and fit better with the arrangements DS2 had made for the evening. We met for a pub meal with my ex's youngest sibling, his son (who I last saw 14 years ago and is now going back on the oil rigs next week) and the son's girlfriend and dog (dog and child friendly pub - it was lovely) and were joined later by another cousin and his dog. Ex's baby bro was his usual self and was repeatedly called out on his racism, sexism, behaviour bordering on being an old pervert and stirring things (even by the cousin who's his contemporary and former partner in crime).

His son and his gf are thinking about getting married but are going to go with 2 friends to the Registry Office. Their argument is that if they invite only close relations there would be 50 people and then various family members would say why hadn't they invited X, Y and Z and they'd be stuck with a 200 guest circus (both sets of parents are remarried so there are a raft of half siblings from previous relationships).

Mummy to be is totally bewildered by the family dynamics (mainly ex's family). She says members of her family fall out but next time they see one another everything is amicable - not bitter grudges and feuds, fuelled by punch ups at weddings and funerals (this one was peaceful because of the people who didn't come). I was more or less an 'honorary widow' for the weekend at DS2's and mummy to be's insistence. I would go in the family car - there was room for 6. Then they mentioned the ex's sister and I thought 'she'll kick off if I'm in the family car. When I voiced this later in the evening, ex's brother said she'd have kicked off because he was in the car. Luckily she sneaked in at the back after everyone else was seated and disappeared as soon as the service finished. 

Mummy to be is concerned about repeated patterns of behaviour which she does not want to continue to my grand -daughter. I told I more or less had all the members of ex's family sussed the first time I met them. If I voiced my opinions about them he would say I was wrong and the situations were totally different. Then as the years passed he would say 'You were right about so and so'.

Spent today at the ex's flat (the 'wake' was at his 'local' 3 doors away). DS2 repeatedly dragged people across to the flat to choose a record, a camera or a tie or all of the above - some people asked for a t-shirt, a badge or an ornament. When I said the boys' inheritance was all in old cameras and vinyl - think of the sort of box lettuce get delivered in (24 lettuce maybe a box 2'6" x 2' and 10" deep. Imagine one of those full of cameras. I counted 7 of them and there are more that still haven't been boxed. And a mountain of instruction manuals that need pairing off with them at some point. The ties are going to a group who make patchwork quilts out of them for babies in the neo-natal unit. The babies get to take their quilt home with them and they will embroider the ex's name onto the quilt(s) they make with them. All his clothes went to a couple of charity shops in the high street and I suggested we went through 3 carrier bags of medical stuff and take all the pills to the chemist for disposal (1 large bag - the rest were dressings of various types plus antiseptic creams and 2 tiny pots of sudocrem for the baby (they were smaller than the little pots of jam hotels have)

DS2's uncle had pointed out several pieces of furniture that were 'Nanna and grandad's' so DS2 wants to hold onto those. So I'm taking temporary custody of 2 sets of drawers, one bureau (small desk with cubby holes behind the drops down to make a desk} and a smallish table. I think they're 1930's 'beautility' ones - very simple, not things of great beauty but exceptionally well made. I don't have room for them so going to have to be very creative with my use of space. I hope the uncle wants to come and collect some of them but I'm not hopeful. I have one box of records for DS3 and I to make a start on. There will be more, many many more.

I'm tired so may sleep and sort things in the mornings  (did clear out most of a notebook yesterday morning). 

Grateful for no fighting (I didn't even gloat about beating ex's brother when we climbed a quarry many years ago - I was 25, he was 16 and I did it wearing Jesus sandals), some good story telling and quote a lot of honesty (they all blame me, I'm the mother) coloured by their own viewpoints.

Deni_debt-free_dreamer

welcome back mothernerd !  I was in Denbighshire so you may have driven past me!!
Happy anniversary to those celebrating, i never made it down the aisle It does make splitting up much more straightforward though
Good luck tomorrow abundant
I've been out for 12 hours today, went to work, had a hectic day, had lunch at 4pm and stayed till almost 7.  Came home via Sains, bought a big bag of tea bags, some F&V, some YS bread and soup (had for tea and was delicious) plus I bought a couple of YS clothing items - definitely keeping one, may return the other.  My spends on clothing earned me a fuel voucher 5p off per litre.

Gratitudes - a good day at work, some bargains in the SM, driving home in daylight

love Deni 

wishus

Happy anniversary @thriftylass and welcome back @mothernerd. Sounds like the funeral went well. Ours did last week too. 

I've been making the most of two days to myself before heading back to the office. Got some tidying and admin done and rung the plasterer for the next stage of house improvements. I've been for walks in the park and got on with some creative projects. I wrote a whole story yesterday too and submitted it 2 minutes before the deadline. With that kind of rush job, I doubt it will get anywhere, but it gets the juices flowing, doesn't it?

As I spent nothing yesterday, I'm on NSD#3.

beanielou

Glad that all went well mothernerd.

I am not sure what I would do about my ex DH's funeral.
I would want to support DS but the rest well............

Thrifty_Taylor

Glad the funerals went well @wishus & @mothernerd.
Thanks all for the anniversary wishes 🥰

NSD#4
Had a disturbed night's sleep thanks to cat coming into our room twice, he had trouble when he wanted to leave as couldn't push the door.
Got up & managed an exercise routine, first time in over a week! A good day at work. DS3 now lost his taste, hope he starts to improve soon. Spent the whole evening (minus 1/2 an hour in the bath), hand stitching the bits on 3 memory bears. All set to be photographed tomorrow, then ready for posting.
Speaking of tattoos @apple_muncher, my DH always had grand plans of getting one that he'd designed himself, but never did. Before having the DS's, I was going to stay the weekend with a friend in Thurso, which included a day trip to Inverness. 2 weeks before I went, I suddenly decided to get a tattoo (had never crossed my mind before), so booked an appointment for when we were in Inverness, & didn't tell DH. I got our first initials, one above the other, separated by a Celtic knot, same as on our wedding rings. Let's just say, the place I got it has plenty of padding & is always covered 😉😂

Grateful for sunshine, a 5 year old who can only say a handful of words, saying my name for the first time, another pupil confiding in me about his worries & me being able to give him some information which made him feel better

apple_muncher

Whoop whoop!!! Mothernerd is back and didn't get into any fights or appear on the local news!!

Take time to rest and recover from it all, please. It sounds good but extremely draining.

ditty1234

@mothernerd that is quite adventure. 

Today I shall have an NSD day. 
I am feeling a bit sad, broke, broken, stretched, stressed and avoiding expectations. I find it hard to concentrate, sleep and do or finish anything. And Mothernerd thanks for 5 D's I do need them. 
I defer decisions like a person from Normal People or Conversations with Friends. 

Hangups:
book summer holidays
Complete some marking
Complete some feedback
Review of feedback - done
Complete another group of Marking - over due - working on.
Translate a text back into english - done
Write a creative project grant application.
All overdue since last week. Then elbow and general anxiety about deadlines - yes it is reoccuring. 
I will try to continue a couple and mainly wrap up a couple today.

Sorry for sharing a vague to do list, but I need somewhere to tick it off. 
I have bagged 2 nsd day so far.
Happy Wednesday.

f0xh0les

No funeral bar room brawls? well done you.

My s/g made me promise not to fight with my mum at her funeral - as s/g was the only one with her address, and shredded it just before she died - so I didn't invite her.  I  feel I kept my promise.   Not that she had seen her in 20 odd years.

Welcome back mothernerd!!!