Help, what to do? Son's teacher just told him Santa's Not Real

before_hollywood

what do you mean santa isn't real???

you mean i have to fight off the crowds in comet for a new hi-fi :eek:

i'm close to 27 btw

petite_anglaise_2

Parents forget that whilst their world revolves around one/two/three little darlings, we secondary school teachers have classes of 30+ to look after, SATs, GCSES,Alevels to prepare for, behaviour management from mad kids to deal with, planning, discipline, meetings and 6 lessons per day to teach. Not complaining, it's great and I love it.. but.. there are a few other things on our mind than whether secondary school age children have been told that Santa doesn't exist.

There is a huge difference between a nice jolly reception teacher sitting down her class of five year olds and deliberately telling them Santa doesn't exist and a secondary teacher making an off the cuff remark to secondary age children. I teach in a great school, but the kids are open to a huge range of info about sex, drugs, swearing, and god knows what else from the mouths of their fellow pupils. Sorry, to seem harsh but that's the reality of life in a secondary school.

As staff we're trying to save them from the dangers of knives, teen pregnancy, drugs, smoking, unemployment and disillusionment, bullying and gangs. And that's in a middle class area.
Santa doesn't even register on our radar.

poet123

Well, as a Governor,Lecturer and parent I believe an educator should weigh their words carefully. To say "Santa does not register on our radar" is to cop out,it is not neccesary for a teacher to mention the subject of Santa in more than broad terms. We should always be aware that different families have different styles of parenting and in cases such as this which do not impact on education,safety,behavior or other kids we should err on the side of caution before we open our mouths.

LouBlue

Becles wrote: »

We've never bothered with Santa as I don't agree with the culture that goes with him. My children haven't suffered at all

Nice avvy there, Becles. :rotfl:

I am ashamed of you lot. Now go rent Miracle on 34th Street and I might forgive you all.

jackieb

petite_anglaise wrote: »

Parents forget that whilst their world revolves around one/two/three little darlings,





As staff we're trying to save them from the dangers of knives, teen pregnancy, drugs, smoking, unemployment and disillusionment, bullying and gangs. And that's in a middle class area.
Santa doesn't even register on our radar.

I find your post a bit condescending. Contrary to popular belief, not all 11 year olds have anything to do with knives, drugs, pregnancy, etc. Some 11 year olds are still children and act like it. You say some parents behave like the world revolves around their 'little darlings'. If so, isn't that better than letting them run wild and getting involved with the kind of things you've mentioned above? School's don't need to say anything at all - it shouldn't be an issue. I can't believe some people don't think there can be an innocent 11yo without them having some learning difficulties!

baileysbattlebus

Just to follow on from my previous post. I mentioned our six year old grandson who lives with us, well so much for him finding out about Father Christmas in the next 2 or 3 years, on Saturday morining after his swimming lesson we had breakfast in Asda, on leaving there was a collection for underprivileged local children, and the question "doesn't Santa go to poor children" so I had to explain that the collection wasn't because Santa didn't visit them, it was because people felt more generous at Xmas and the money collected would be for things throughout the year. Pheww
Then outside there was a Round Table sleigh and Santa collecting, on giving him his £1 for the collection he said "Grandma that man's not Santa" so I said "Oh really, what makes you say that", and he replied the man didn't look like Santa and he was wearing jeans. I told him that Santa was probably very busy right now and maybe it was one of his helpers. So he was quite happy and although he knew that the Santa wasn't the real one, his face when the guy asked him if he'd been a good boy and what would he like at Xmas was a picture. However on the way home in the car he told me that his friend at school had told him there was no Santa and that parents bought the presents. His friend is seven. What a blow, I had thought he would be about 8 or 9 before he found out. But as with my own children I told him we didn't buy presents so where do they come from ?? He can remember previous Xmas's so he knows there will be presents. Well, he's a bit stumped at the moment and stumped he will remain.
We put our tree up yesterday, as it was being decorated he told me the same friend had told him that Mary and Joseph and baby Jesus didn't exist, what brought that on I've no idea. To be honest I'm not religious in any make way or form and I didn't push my views onto our children they were free to make their own choices regarding beliefs, things like this didn't come up at his age (6), they were much older. I sort of side stepped answering him as I don't want to put my views into his head and to be honest was at a bit of loss.
It was their Xmas play last week which had a meaning of Xmas theme and the end of the play was the Nativity, (meaning of Xmas?) which is obviously where the Mary, Joseph and Jesus stuff came from.

madoldbat

Hi Baily well you can be totaly honest and tell your grandson Mary ,Joseph and Jesus did exsist and we celibrate Christmas because of his birth.Lots of people belive his teachings some (like me think he came from God to save us) others respect his teachings as a prophet.
Asking odd questions at odd times my kids are experts:o :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

itsakidsworld

This is an excellent thread and has turned up some very honest and open comments. Christmas is a time to reflect on all we do and say to others and this includes how we act with our own children and what we explain to them in order to help them grow.

My user name basically tells you how I feel about this world and so for me Christmas is a wonderful time to show even more love and affection I have for my family in the giving of gifts and also in explaining what Christmas means from my angle. This does include the romance of Santa but it also includes the need to love and care, not just about receiving the latest "must have gadgets" at all costs! Only two days ago I posted a thread asking for help in solving a problem with the delivery of a present. Should I have posted this question to Santa? YES but I figured he would be too busy at the moment to deal with my paperwork so hopefully his little helpers (you!!) would be able to help me!!

Society is changing and the world is changing and we all have to grow with this change. The romance of Santa is wonderful and maybe by looking at this thread we can all help each other to grow in our ways of coping with belief and so help our own children and the children of the future by understanding when is the correct time to introduce subtle changes to explain to our children where the gifts come from?

I have never told my children that Santa does not exist although they do not believe any more. However even I have now looked at myself and decided that it is correct to explain in a gentle manner the reasoning of giving gifts even though they no longer believe. I will be using a comment from one of the replies as that one suits me.

Good luck to you all and may you grow in love and knowledge this Christmas.

System

I hope that you've told him the truth about sex.

Bullying due to believing in Santa will be nothing compared to the treatment he will get when he mentions gooseberry bushes and storks.

duchy

I think there's a fine line. My son "believes" because he knows that "Those who believe recieve"
I've met a LOT of families recently with older siblings who no longer believe (I'm working in Santa's grotto) but it's clear that many of them still enjoy the magic even though they don't *really* believe anymore but know their younger siblings do still believe and wouldn't spoil it for anything.
As for the OP-I do think your son would have been teased cruelly if he'd gone back to school in January talking about "What Santa brought". I used to work in a high school and do know what I'm talking about. It isn't wrong to tell him that we all keep the story of Santa going because we'd all like to believe as it makes Christmas more magic.