Debt and Caring

PennysIntoPounds

Being ill is shoddy, rest up and don't pressure yourself unnecessarily. Good ideas may even occur while you're not doing the focusing aspects of the plans and projects

WelshmansDaughter

I do feel sometimes this diary has become a tad repetitive. Get sick, feel well again repeat. It's almost like I don't learn from my behaviour 🤣

Colleagues commenting on how tired I am today, I don't know how these normal people live every day so cheery and not victim to their lack of emotional regulation. Genuinely never see them tired or blah.

Cherryfudge

It's interesting you put this down to behaviour. How much really is behavioural, and how much is other things, like work pressures, responsibilities, physical health, etc? And how much are you seeing the reality of colleagues' lives? Could some of them be masking? Do they have less to do, or analyse it less? Do they have advantages such as someone to share the load, or an easy commute or fewer working hours? I don't need to know the answers, obviously, but some of these things might be worth considering. And if there are elements that are behavioural, what is keeping you to those behaviours? It's probably not a simple case of 'Well, I'll just stop doing X and do Y instead', because there will be reasons you've not already done that.

PennysIntoPounds

You do seem to have a lot of jobs/responsibilities/obligations!

I don't think the problem is your lack of behavioural regulation so don't be pointing a blamey finger inwards, more that you must be blimmin worn down trying to be here, there and everywhere. And spending time with children is always going to result in regular illness, bless them but they are manky

WelshmansDaughter

Behaviour in the dictionary sense- as in the 'manner in which one acts'.

The illness was a stomach acid flare up followed by pms so I don't think I can blame the children for any of that… And the acid thing I think could have been avoided if I didn't like to 'forget' that it builds up over time. I was drinking coffee every day and then had wine with a massive meal so tipped me over the edge.

Mood has been very low since- amazing what no caffeine feels like. I've been nodding off like a pensioner. Bit of a mood improvement today as I thought I had made a decision on something but now evening and second guessing has settled in.

PennysIntoPounds

Damn, hate it when you have to remember to behave responsibly. Down with this sort of thing! 😁

Second thoughts might turn out to be useful, park it for now and have a nice relaxing evening and see how you feel about it after a night's sleep.

WelshmansDaughter

Pretty sure there is a part of my brain going You Must Respect My Authority while the rest of it pisses itself laughing.

WelshmansDaughter

Currently sitting in a Pret having dinner before an evening shift. Been on a walking job for six days and my legs are cursing me. And my work shoes. Moment of mild amusement as a customer found me en route this morning to get his refund cheque. I'm convinced he has been coming out in his car to find the posties this week. Apparently a red wine is coming my way as I located it for him on a random street corner.

The life of a postie is a strange one. I'll miss some aspects of it. If I ever manage to leave lol

WelshmansDaughter

Good lord I've just seen three bums walk by. They were attached to girls who seriously misjudged their clothing size. I'm getting old- on my way home from work through the main street and am shocked by the number of drunk inappropriately dressed people. Genuinely forgotten that people do that sort of thing.

I've also just met a 32 year old grandma. Mind blown. Lovely woman but looks about 12.

Another shift tomorrow, this time during the day. Hopefully gather a bit more evidence to sway a decision one way or the other.

PennysIntoPounds

Not sure if it's a plus point or a minus point that you get to see and meet all life in its rich tapestry 😂