Debt and Caring

savingholmes

I would push through and sign on - as how will you pay your mortgage otherwise?

I have signed on in the past - I'm not saying its fun but it preserves your NI credit and contributes towards your state pension even I think during the waiting period.

Sorry you are still feeling so exhausted.

stymied

Is Teacup staying with your sister? If you have a working sink & loo at your flat I would be going with getting the sleeping option set up there even if it’s a sofa bed for now. Whatever you do now doesn’t have to be perfect because it doesn’t have to be permanent.

Cherryfudge

Some wise words above.

I sympathise re the noise in shops. No idea why they have to have their radios on loud. Sometimes it means I can't process the choices I need to make, particularly if I'm trying to choose a gift or a card and the mood of the music intrudes on me tuning in to what the person would like. I think it's as much about entertaining the staff as anything, and ironically it's more a feature in shops where it appears staff haven't enough to do. Anyway, I'm with you on finding it a problem.

Child care: I think anyone would be tired after the day you had at the airport. If you were working with children you wouldn't be expected to carry someone all the time, you'd be entitled to your breaks and you'd have colleagues to share with. You'd have other adults around to share the planning, and you'd have a ready-made structure to slide into.

You've also got a lot to cope with at the moment so you need that time out, like lying on the couch. Just peace and quiet. And remember looking after toddlers isn't all about creating fun times - teach him to have quiet times as well, whether you plug into a TV programme together or read books or play with blocks... help him find value in different experiences that your mind and body can also sustain. It's all part of him learning social skills that will stand him in good stead later, when he can't be the centre of attention. That doesn't mean he can't have his time watching helicopters, but perhaps he can help learn to pack his food and that could include something for you? Perhaps there are games you can play on the journey ('let's have a walking race to the next lamp post than I'll carry you to the one after that'). Build those mini rest times in earlier in the day when he's not tired, because that way you can bank energy for both of you. You will probably get some resistance to new things at first but as an adult you can be widening his horizons as well as giving him lots of fun.

savingholmes

Since learning I was autistic - I now always carry noise cancelling earphones to reduce noise levels (even if I play no music) and usually had big headphones available in a work bag or in my car. I use them in shops and pubs etc when needed as otherwise I can find it overwhelming. Perhaps you could try that.

savingholmes

Hope you are doing ok

doingitanyway

Catching up on diaries and wondering where you are and how you are?

PennysIntoPounds

Another one hoping you're okay, and that Teacup arriving last week meant you went back to your flat and have been too busy making it marvellous/liveable to post

Cherryfudge

Missed you over the past few days, hope you're okay?

doingitanyway

Just thought of you. Posted about libraries. I know you are a fellow library lover. Come back when you can. Please. If you want to,,,

savingholmes

Hope your flat or shrubbery didn't swallow you whole... Thinking of you.