Becoming debt free within 18 months

badmemory

I did over 3 years visiting my mother in a care home 4/5 days a week.  I have never (even in my bad years) eaten so badly or been so unfit.  From going to the gym at least 4 days a week I was down to a totally exhausted sunday.  The disaster didn't even occur to me until right at the end & by then I was totally out of the habit.  I wish I had known at the beginning what I know now & I may have fended off the result.

Getridofdebt66

@badmemory that must have been such a hard time for you all. I completely agree, the past few weeks I haven't looked after myself at all, just coasting through my days like a zombie. Unfortunately it is end of life for my relative so going to get worse in the next week or so. I am focusing on dd atm and just getting through the work day. I am aware I am not eating properly, and down to 1 meal a day atm defo not good just dont seem to have the time to cook properly and dont have the funds for fast food. I will try harder this week to eat a bit better and get some rest time but that could change in a moment...but its for family and they come first.

Getridofdebt66

Managed to get all my jobs done today, me and dd was up earlier today and managed the tip first thing which was great a horrible job done and not much out my way to save a bit of petrol compared to doing it as a run by itself.

Tomorrow's plans 
Work all day
Food from stores
Put some more washing away
General housework 
Have a relaxing evening with dd  

Thats all I plan, need to have a bit of rest time.

badmemory

I found it hard getting the brain space to figure out the normal day to day things.  I was exhausted but not the good type where you know you have achieved a lot.  I suppose drained is a good way of describing it so something to watch out for.

jusferbrowsing

Sounds after all that like you will need a bit of rest time. Enjoy your evening with dd tomorrow.

Getridofdebt66

Completely agree @badmemory i feel like my brain is full of fog.

Unfortunately my relative passed away this afternoon, absolutely awful especially how fast he declined. I have spoken with my mom and dad, they are beyond devastated. Told dd she was sobbing, just awful for the family.

I have sat on my sofa all evening and just done nothing but watch tv and cuddle dd. 

Thank you @jusferbrowsing i did need a restful evening with dd especially after the events of today. 

Tomorrow i have work and will see my mom, beyond that i am focusing on family and not spending. 

I have been thinking about money a lot the past few days. Obviously i have no money whilst paying off my debts but i want to enjoy life and know i am not getting in debt to enjoy life. I am going to focus on paying everything i can off as soon as possible. I will use this as my motivation to have the life i want as it is too short.

Initially i thought stuff all this im gonna just book a holiday or something wild but i thought and thought thats what ive been doing for years and where has it got me. This is my changing point. Now.

badmemory

So sorry to hear your news.

jusferbrowsing

I'm so sorry to hear of the passing of your relative. You have my condolences.

Maybe rather than a proper holiday consider booking a night away as a treat. We have basically rebuilt our house over the years paying for the work on balance transfers and repaying before the interest kicked in. That has saved a lot of money but there has been little spent fun wise.

Little but not none at all.

We found the odd night in a hotel/caravan/tent has felt amazing especially if you spend best parts of two days either side of your night away from home. Somewhere with nice walks and a packed lunch for the first day means its not too expensive especially off peak.

You're doing amazingly well. I wish you well especially getting through this sad time x

Getridofdebt66

Thank you both @badmemory and @jusferbrowsing for your condolences, it means a lot. At the moment I am trying to just keep it together and carry on as best as I can. He was not well for long and went downhill really quickly so it is a shock. 

@jusferbrowsing i think a night away would do us all some good. I will see what pennies are spare, should be some in next months pay and got a few hectic weeks coming up to see if we can go away for a night to just be somewhere else, just a break really. I also want to look for a few nights camping in the holidays but may wait and book something last min as i want to make sure we have some decent weather doesnt have to be hot just not raining. Will see if we can have a few random days down my moms holiday home. It's not far but a break. 

Today i visited my mom, shes heart broken so spent a few hours there, oh did dd some tea and mom sent me home with food so i have eaten a real meal today. Had a night of chatting, laughing and just being there with dd today. I think shes missed me the past few weeks with me being everywhere bless her but im back and present now, i never leave her and i feel so much better for our evening together. 

Tomorrows plans
Work
Lsd-need petrol
All food from stores, doing a proper dinner tomorrow and should be leftovers for lunch on Thursday. 
A bit of tidying at home but again want an evening in with dd and oh.

Going to be a quiet few days for us ready for the mad few weeks until the holidays. This time of year everything comes all at once and doing it with a tight budget is no easy task but i have to try. Preparation is key. 

enthusiasticsaver

Sorry to hear about your relative and be kind to yourself.  I urge you not to rush into impulsively booking holidays.  In my experience that does not help with the grieving process and may in fact make you feel worse if you feel guilty you have set back your debt free date even further. So you feel sad because you are recently bereaved and guilty and anxious about money.   Just put everything to the back of your mind and focus on taking care of yourself and your family. If your mum has a holiday home maybe borrow that in a few weeks time just for a change of scenery.