Vendor is insistent on visiting after completion

Swasterix

MaryNB said:

BikingBud said:

I'm not sure what is legally correct or incorrect in these circumstances and it seems that many others are not sure either but after 11 pages what is clear is that there are some who consider even a minor inconvenience to help others such a significant burden that they should not and will not extend a courtesy of giving a little.

It's endemic behaviour; manners and courtesy towards others seem to be of a bygone era, on the roads, in shops, travelling on public transport, in all aspects of daily interaction, selfishness takes over.

How do we get to the stage where we are so far detached from other people and are unwilling to tolerate and give a little time and empathy for others?

OP said in one of their posts that he gets annoyed when they're not home to give him his post.

He has a sense of entitlement that the OP shouldn't have to pander to. Why should the OP go out of their way to help him when he's too lazy to sort his own affairs and is rude to others who he expects to sort his post for him.

Redirection is a very basic thing to do. While it's not perfect and the odd letter can slip through, the op can pop it back in the post box when it suits them to do so. The previous home owner isn't entitled to expect the OP to be home when it suits him to give him his post.  

On a slightly different note…

In my experience I found redirection to be a total waste of time and money. We paid for a 12 month redirection. In the first month of us moving house, probably 2 of 10 letters we received managed to be redirected. I was constantly going to the old house to pick up mail (the new owners were very understanding). They were that useless that in the end Royal Mail gave us our money back but kept the redirection in place. 

Our vendors on the other hand didn’t bother to do a redirection (or contact their suppliers to change address it seems). For the first 6 months I collected their mail and hand delivered it to them as they’d only moved 10 mins walk away. I finally got sick and just started putting their post in the bin. This must have spurred them on as within a couple of months it all stopped. 

user1977

Swasterix said:

MaryNB said:

BikingBud said:

I'm not sure what is legally correct or incorrect in these circumstances and it seems that many others are not sure either but after 11 pages what is clear is that there are some who consider even a minor inconvenience to help others such a significant burden that they should not and will not extend a courtesy of giving a little.

It's endemic behaviour; manners and courtesy towards others seem to be of a bygone era, on the roads, in shops, travelling on public transport, in all aspects of daily interaction, selfishness takes over.

How do we get to the stage where we are so far detached from other people and are unwilling to tolerate and give a little time and empathy for others?

OP said in one of their posts that he gets annoyed when they're not home to give him his post.

He has a sense of entitlement that the OP shouldn't have to pander to. Why should the OP go out of their way to help him when he's too lazy to sort his own affairs and is rude to others who he expects to sort his post for him.

Redirection is a very basic thing to do. While it's not perfect and the odd letter can slip through, the op can pop it back in the post box when it suits them to do so. The previous home owner isn't entitled to expect the OP to be home when it suits him to give him his post.  

In my experience I found redirection to be a total waste of time and money. We paid for a 12 month redirection. In the first month of us moving house, probably 2 of 10 letters we received managed to be redirected. I was constantly going to the old house to pick up mail (the new owners were very understanding). They were that useless that in the end Royal Mail gave us our money back but kept the redirection in place. 

The task of spotting redirections and putting the stickers on is down to your postie, as it's only done when they're sorting the mail for their walk, so the service standard is going to depend entirely on how competent they are. I've only had a few slip through when I've used redirections.

Gavin83

The_Real_Cheddar_Bob said:

It's entitlement. Possibly the gent has moved to a larger place, or see the op as inferior to him in some way. Regardless, id cut this crap out now.

That’s very presumptuous.

Given the circumstances I imagine it’s much more likely the guy misses the house he raised his family in and his wife died in and he finds any excuse he can to go back. 

Also presumptuous but you don’t know the circumstances so some compassion might be nice. I do however agree that the OP can’t put up with this forever and does need to put a stop to it. I just think it needs to be more delicate and sympathetic than some are suggesting here.

MaryNB

Gavin83 said:

The_Real_Cheddar_Bob said:

It's entitlement. Possibly the gent has moved to a larger place, or see the op as inferior to him in some way. Regardless, id cut this crap out now.

That’s very presumptuous.

Given the circumstances I imagine it’s much more likely the guy misses the house he raised his family in and his wife died in and he finds any excuse he can to go back. 

Also presumptuous but you don’t know the circumstances so some compassion might be nice. I do however agree that the OP can’t put up with this forever and does need to put a stop to it. I just think it needs to be more delicate and sympathetic than some are suggesting here.

The OP said he gets annoyed when they're not there to give him his post. He made things difficult for them during the sales process, messing them about and constantly lying to them. They let him leave large furniture in the house so he didn't have to get rid of it despite the fact he drives a Luton van.

OP has been very accommodating to date. This man is taking advantage.

UnderOffer

user1977 said:

Swasterix said:

MaryNB said:

BikingBud said:

I'm not sure what is legally correct or incorrect in these circumstances and it seems that many others are not sure either but after 11 pages what is clear is that there are some who consider even a minor inconvenience to help others such a significant burden that they should not and will not extend a courtesy of giving a little.

It's endemic behaviour; manners and courtesy towards others seem to be of a bygone era, on the roads, in shops, travelling on public transport, in all aspects of daily interaction, selfishness takes over.

How do we get to the stage where we are so far detached from other people and are unwilling to tolerate and give a little time and empathy for others?

OP said in one of their posts that he gets annoyed when they're not home to give him his post.

He has a sense of entitlement that the OP shouldn't have to pander to. Why should the OP go out of their way to help him when he's too lazy to sort his own affairs and is rude to others who he expects to sort his post for him.

Redirection is a very basic thing to do. While it's not perfect and the odd letter can slip through, the op can pop it back in the post box when it suits them to do so. The previous home owner isn't entitled to expect the OP to be home when it suits him to give him his post.  

In my experience I found redirection to be a total waste of time and money. We paid for a 12 month redirection. In the first month of us moving house, probably 2 of 10 letters we received managed to be redirected. I was constantly going to the old house to pick up mail (the new owners were very understanding). They were that useless that in the end Royal Mail gave us our money back but kept the redirection in place. 

The task of spotting redirections and putting the stickers on is down to your postie, as it's only done when they're sorting the mail for their walk, so the service standard is going to depend entirely on how competent they are. I've only had a few slip through when I've used redirections.

We had a few missed letters both sent to our old address and where we received mail for the previous owners of our house, it was no bother at all just to put the post back in the post box unmarked, second time around Royal Mail would then redirect to new house. Very rarely saw same letters returned. 

csgohan4

Gavin83 said:

The_Real_Cheddar_Bob said:

It's entitlement. Possibly the gent has moved to a larger place, or see the op as inferior to him in some way. Regardless, id cut this crap out now.

That’s very presumptuous.

Given the circumstances I imagine it’s much more likely the guy misses the house he raised his family in and his wife died in and he finds any excuse he can to go back. 

Also presumptuous but you don’t know the circumstances so some compassion might be nice. I do however agree that the OP can’t put up with this forever and does need to put a stop to it. I just think it needs to be more delicate and sympathetic than some are suggesting here.

None of what you said is the OP's problem. Buying/selling is purely transactional. If the vendor thought otherwise he should have  dropped the price to get a friend as part of the deal. 

If my old vendor kept calling at my house and bugging us for his post, I would not be happy.

I wrote RTS on all my vendors post, they soon stopped coming after a few months.  If the vendor wanted a PA, then pay for the service, we all have more important things to worry about than other people's junk. 

mattyprice4004

We had similar on a lesser level, being nicey-nicey didn't sort it so I unfortunately had to have a rather difficult conversation with the ex-owner. 
They didn't realise what a pain they were being, but when I clarified things they apologised and we haven't seen them since. 

lookstraightahead

I think in general people like to pretend that when they buy a house, it's never been anyone else's home.

Josiea

BikingBud said:

I'm not sure what is legally correct or incorrect in these circumstances and it seems that many others are not sure either but after 11 pages what is clear is that there are some who consider even a minor inconvenience to help others such a significant burden that they should not and will not extend a courtesy of giving a little.

It's endemic behaviour; manners and courtesy towards others seem to be of a bygone era, on the roads, in shops, travelling on public transport, in all aspects of daily interaction, selfishness takes over.

How do we get to the stage where we are so far detached from other people and are unwilling to tolerate and give a little time and empathy for others?

Not sure if you read my comments saying that we literally did everything to help him. Including allowing him to leave a shed and garage full for two weeks until he cleared it, as we understood it is often hard to downsize. We printed off the homebuyers report and delivered it to him, rather than emailing as we understood he was not tech savvy. We allowed him to leave multiple large items of furniture and a small piano worth absolutely nothing, just so he could move into his new property with ease. 

And can I just note, he had purchased his new property in a separate transaction, so our purchase was chain free (no completion dates holding him back from moving his belongings earlier than he did). 

I have even offered to help him set up a redirection, change his v5 address etc.

But he is still bothering us, and I believe he is well and truly taking pure advantage of our kindness. 

Josiea

lookstraightahead said:

I think in general people like to pretend that when they buy a house, it's never been anyone else's home.

But… it’s not anyone else’s house at present. And I will understand that the next person to buy my house will know that it is only theirs at present and leave them to live happily in it.