We really can't afford the house we want/need will things get better for us or just forget it?

mrsmortgage

RelievedSheff said:

But they are sharing the 14sqm room so in effect have 7sqm each.

Giving them both a room at 9sqm means that they have more space to themselves!!

Yes, but they're not getting that, they're getting a much smaller room that they still have to share. 

purplebutterfly

MrsMortgage - could you clarify exactly how many bedrooms you currently have, how many children you currently have and how many bedrooms you WANT because none of this makes any sense right now, so it is hard for people to give advice.   

mrsmortgage

We currently have a three bedroom end of terrace with no possibilities to extend.
We are a family of six, girls (10-11 who currently share), one 14yo boy and a 20mo boy.
In an ideal world obviously I want a 5 bedroom house,but that's way beyond what we can afford. Currently with a budget of £380k we have been able to find 4 bedroom houses, but ultimately all 4 bedrooms are significantly smaller than our current bedrooms, which is why as much as the baby would get his own room, the girls would end up with a substantially smaller living space. My daughter in particular has a massive issue about this.
So what it looks like to make (or keep the quality of life of most of the children), we're looking for the boys to share somehow until we can miraculously afford that extra room (while keeping the size of our current rooms) with the £380k that we have at our disposal. 

Grumpelstiltskin

mrsmortgage said:

We currently have a three bedroom end of terrace with no possibilities to extend.
We are a family of six, girls (10-11 who currently share), one 14yo boy and a 20mo boy.
In an ideal world obviously I want a 5 bedroom house,but that's way beyond what we can afford. Currently with a budget of £380k we have been able to find 4 bedroom houses, but ultimately all 4 bedrooms are significantly smaller than our current bedrooms, which is why as much as the baby would get his own room, the girls would end up with a substantially smaller living space. My daughter in particular has a massive issue about this.
So what it looks like to make (or keep the quality of life of most of the children), we're looking for the boys to share somehow until we can miraculously afford that extra room (while keeping the size of our current rooms) with the £380k that we have at our disposal. 

Your daughter has massive issues?
For the first 23 years of my life I had a bedroom with no form of heating, a bathroom with just a cold tap, the only toilet outside down the yard. How would she have coped with that?

mrsmortgage

Grumpelstiltskin said:

Your daughter has massive issues?
For the first 23 years of my life I had a bedroom with no form of heating, a bathroom with just a cold tap, the only toilet outside down the yard. How would she have coped with that?

The room at her dad's is fairly big she was your typical only child until I remarried. 

RelievedSheff

The daughters are 10 and 11. I'm afraid at that age they don't really get to say they have issues about their room size!

mrsmortgage

Well it didn't end well! I ended up telling her of how we all make sacrifices (me included as I hate where we love bit didn't have a choice as she loved here too!) 

And that argument was not about sharing but rather about not having her own room. 

gettingtheresometime

mrsmortgage said:

Grumpelstiltskin said:

Your daughter has massive issues?
For the first 23 years of my life I had a bedroom with no form of heating, a bathroom with just a cold tap, the only toilet outside down the yard. How would she have coped with that?

The room at her dad's is fairly big she was your typical only child until I remarried. 

I'm not sure what you mean by that especially as Junior is an only child & whilst he definitely was able to have more than if he'd had siblings , if we couldn't afford something he wanted then he didn't have it.
Are you sure there isn't a little bit of trying to keep up with what her father can provide rather than being practical about the situation creeping in?

gettingtheresometime

RelievedSheff said:

The daughters are 10 and 11. I'm afraid at that age they don't really get to say they have issues about their room size!

If the children aren't contributing to the cost of the house then regardless of age they don't get a say, in my book

Tiddleshalifax

I’m not sure what you mean by typical only child? I only have one daughter… she doesn’t dictate the house we live in - merely has the choice in decoration!! We are in the process of moving and aside from ensuring we were in an appropriate area, she has not had any choice over the home we have purchased. 

Sorry if I’m missing something here but I detect a child run dictatorship and I think you need to quash that. That should then make your decision much easier…
it’s also nice to have holidays but absolutely not essential. Myself and my husband had polar opposite childhoods - mine was very humble - I didn’t go abroad until I was 13 and even then it was with school! We just simply couldn’t - my parents worked hard to ensure that we had other experiences - and a good roof over our heads. If anything, it made me work hard as an adult to ensure that my child was provided for.,. She currently understands that as we are taking a financial hit to provide a larger home, she will have to sacrifice the foreign holidays - and as it’s all very exciting moving home - she won’t even bat an eyelid!