Declutter Mind and Declutter home

Mrs_Salad_Dodger

BarbCh, I am so very sorry that you have left the Declutter thread & that I was unable to encourage you to stay 😢 My cheerleading needs improvement as I feel like I failed you by not being a bit more proactive in censuring the person who made you feel unloved. You are an inspiration to all of us & I do hope that you will feel strong enough to return at some point. 

I am missing you already & sending you lots of 🤗 🤗🤗🤗 

MrsSD 🤗 

P.S. just noticed that you left your posts praising other declutterers & only removed the posts about yourself - you are a very classy lady 🙂

-taff

BarbCh said:

So  I believe it's all about what you think about your own situation .... not others! We should be here to support and encourage each other in their own way and efforts to make improvements. 
I personally dont get inspiration from reading a list of throwing away  1 envelop and 2 magazines..... but if it works for others... that's ok..... I  know that it flags up to others eading the thread, that maybe they need to get rid of old magazines and letters etc....
Only this morning I  have been sorting through paperwork and thrown away a birthday card that I've kept for 4 months! 
So I  get it, but it doesn't really inspire me to have to document it.... but that is just me and my way.

No, it doesn't flag up someone needs to remove a magazine or whatever, it's participation in a thread that deals with decluttering, that they are sharing in the decluttering mojo. It's not meant to be an inspiration to others, it's a way of keeping count of the things that have been decluttered. And it's joining in with the group that counts. As well as actually decluttering something.

It's as well to remember that whoever starts a thread here can always expect at some point messages they don't want to read or messages that disagree with them.

helensbiggestfan

BarbCh.  I think those pictures are brilliant, especially the third one and its depiction of "overwhelm".   

Not feeling great at the moment, so easing up on the decluttering but I did manage to take a car load to the recycling plant today,  a job well done, if I do say so myself.  

I think a lot of us keep too much stuff as an antidote to feelings of loss, grief, or insecurity. It becomes our security blanket and it can be difficult to give them up.  It's not only small children who need security blankets. 

I knkw exactly why I got into the habit of over shopping,  I can't explain in detail now because I'm about to run out of battery on my iPad. But suffice it say my need to buy and surround myself with material goods and possessions stem back to a childhood of lack. I wanted abundance and as soon as I started earning my own money I tried to buy it.  

Unfortunately I confused abundance with over consumption, choosing quantity instead of quality. I ended up never being really satisfied with my purchases or feeling guilty at "wasting" money,  a nasty vicious circle.  Thankfully after a lot of soul searching I now  understand what drove my spendthrift ways, my desperate need to own stuff.  

Now can get rid of some of it ......no guilt, no shame.  It's so liberating, I feel that a weight is lifting from my shoulders.  I do think you have to do the mental work first.....otherwise you never really address the reasons for clutter creep.  You do need to find out the  "why".  

BarbCh

@helensbiggestfan... I'm glad that you can relate to the pics. You may have noticed that I  have deleted a lot my posts.... I'm feeling quite down at the moment and seem to be inviting comments that I  am viewing as negative! 
I've gone into survival mode so probably won't  be posting much.... but obviously I will reply to such lovely posts as yours.
You have given such a great explanation and insight into what we view as abundance.... I'm sure many others will resonate with it.
Keep up the good work..... we all deserve a break from time to time and a day off from sorting clutter is ok..... I've now had 2 days off and I'm a bit concerned that I am entering a downward spiral!! 
I've always been a tough resourceful type of person.... full of good advice and support for others.... but when people see you as that strong person, they dont offer help back as they think you don't  need it!!! 
I often suffer in silence...... so I  am going into hibernation mode for a while until I  can shake myself out if it.... I  will keep my eye on the posts though take care ❤🤕

BarbCh

Mrs_Salad_Dodger said:

BarbCh, I am so very sorry that you have left the Declutter thread & that I was unable to encourage you to stay 😢 My cheerleading needs improvement as I feel like I failed you by not being a bit more proactive in censuring the person who made you feel unloved. You are an inspiration to all of us & I do hope that you will feel strong enough to return at some point. 

I am missing you already & sending you lots of 🤗 🤗🤗🤗 

MrsSD 🤗 

P.S. just noticed that you left your posts praising other declutterers & only removed the posts about yourself - you are a very classy lady 🙂

Thank you Mrs SD .... I  dont think that I  want to share my experiences at the moment or create room for criticism.... we all have our own opinions and perspectives, reasons why we do things etc..... I  don't  need to tell people about my journey or show pictures of it.... I've realised this..... and I  did it hoping to inspire people..... but I  dont think the thread followers are interested, so I  will retreat with dignity... hence deleting my posts. 
I'm actually a bit down myself at the moment and dont need to create stress for myself.
Keep up the good work that you are doing in keeping people's motivation up, and your kind comments time are much appreciated 🙂

TC77

BarbCh so glad that you set this thread up and hope you keep it going. I think the pictures totally capture the feeling of overwhelm. 
Did look to see if I could get Karen Kingston audio book and another feng shui but to no avail. Know my keeping things and also comfort eating are due to some anxieties and fears which I do need to address. Now worry my house is going to collapse- major flood from bay window a few years ago and v long saga with insurance ( I won financially but not emotionally), ongoing rats in the extension walls, DD2 didn't realise shower was overflowing and another flood in living room - also architect/builder caused other problems with extension - I lost financially and emotionally. Now when it rains or is very windy etc imagine disaster! Although not people but have worries about them too. Going to see my dad and do some caring tomorrow - haven't seen him for months so looking forward to that.
Take care everyone and hugs to those in need x

Mrs_Salad_Dodger

BarbCh, so sorry that you are feeling so down ☹️ However please take comfort in knowing that you have ignited a willingness to look at the why’s & wherefore’s of why I have clutter. You are right to look after yourself & you know yourself well enough to know what you need to do for you. Please know that I will be thinking of you & that I am sending positive thoughts and hugs 🤗 . 

Hoping to see you soon.

MrsSD

BarbCh

@TC77 on dear I really feel for you. It must be such a stress and worry about your home.... I  hope and pray that you have the situation resolved soon. Such ongoing stress about things beyond your control are just horrifying. It's easy for people to tell you to stay strong... especially  when you fear things around you are collapsing.
I'm sorry to say that we all get wrapped up in our own little worlds and don't  even consider that that our issues are insignificant when it comes to what people like yourself are faced with...   it shames me at times. 
And you have the grace to send hugs to others..... so I  send them back tenfold to you.

BarbCh

@Mrs_Salad_Dodger thank you for your kind words and positive thoughts. I will be fine and bounce back ok.... I always have done! 

KxMx

Used my daily exercise to drop a not insignificant amount of Food Warehouse carrier bags locally, to be used in a pop up food shop. Usually it's bring your own bag to fill but with lockdown they are giving out out pre filled bags and needed more.

Bulk of Nan's stuff is going on Wednesday, then I need a dry day plus some energy to tackle the big shed to get at the collectables (gulp). 
Last time the shed was turned out I took advantage of Dad's visit but no helper this time!