Declutter Mind and Declutter home

helensbiggestfan

Definitely Candy.  Stress can be a killer, literally. 

 Prolonged stress Was the reason for my wrecked my health.  The good news is - eventually, with lots of time, TLC and some mental effort we can mitigate some of the devastating effects.  Healing does take a long time though.  

3secondmemory

My home is a reflection of my state of mind! At the moment it’s terrible. I have polar swings of hyperactivity and executive dysfunction when I’m in normal physical health thanks to ADHD. I’ve been physically ill for the last 11 months which hasn’t helped. I just don’t know where to start.

TC77

Wow, just been reading all the posts, and so insightful, and illustrating how we get where we are today. I don't like waste, and happy to give away large items ](except if from family and then I struggle more. I got rid of family items when I was briefly with DD2's father as he hated some items (they were actually the best) and regret and don't want to make the same mistake. I have a background in environmental work so want to see everything reused if possible, both my parents were in the war - RAF and nurse so philosophy of reusing things. The aspirational thing isn't me but I've lost my way style wise - as a young adult and into my 30s I had a clear sense of who I was and it evolved and changed, but then with relationships I was criticised, and belittled and have not got myself back, and more indecisive about what I like and what suits me, and so both furniture mismatches (which on the whole I'm fine with as eclectic is cool with me and I've been  called quirky although I don't see myself that way) and clothes. 
Helen interesting and inspirational how you're approaching being 70 ,I'm 58 and will be going through my wardrobe in a few months to do thorough declutter as to what I enjoy wearing. I work and will for a good few years, but work clothes are changing, and having got unfit and larger, giving myself 100 days of healthier eating and 2-3 months of the pool being open (swimming is my big destressor which I have missed so much) and then anything that doesn't fit will go as I want to accept my body and be grateful what I can do - in the last few years developed no of health complications). 
Taff - your story is particularily inspirational as you seemed to do this over a short period - how long did it take? I think some of mine is also self esteem - and not wanting to waste - so a vest with a small hole - do I keep - it still keeps me warm, it's hidden when tucked in, and no-one but me sees it and no use to anyone else, paints - one day I'd like to think I will use them, and wool I used to love knitting so once decluttered and working less I want to knit etc etc. @Siebrie very moving about your husband and puts things in perspective about how much we have. I have simplified finances and paperwork but more to do.
Love how everyone sharing helps my insight and also being kinder to myself, about how I've got lost and that I will find my way back. Next few month I will chip away as DD2 is focused on GCSEs which seem like non stop exams (although now called assessments). Free give away sites are open again so will use these, and also rearranging so things I don't currently use are away (I do have some empty shelves and drawers from previous decluttering) but tend to have things out on open shelves and piled up (more dyslexia and I'm sure some ADD rather than laziness.  I do like Andrew Mellon and going to do his free online course later this month.
Have a lovely easter all and stay safe.

3secondmemory

Morning TC77. I love swimming – it’s the only thing that really grounds me. 

villagelife

My neighbours moved out about 2-3 weeks ago now and since then I have felt so much lighter and more positive. I have felt able to make plans and look forward and an now happy to be at home. 
I hadn't realised how much of an effect the neighbours having on me. He used to watch every time I went out and stood and watched me in the garden. 
I, too, am visualising where I want my life to be and taking tiny steps to achieve that. I do know that I don't do well with diets but am making small changes to my meals which are healthy and tasty and it doesn't feel like a diet.
My finances are being sorted and hopefully will be able to stop work when DH semi retires.
Small items have left the house but as had recent work done to the house most stuff is in a spare bedroom and only things I want to keep  are coming downstairs at the moment.

-taff

TC77 said:

Taff - your story is particularily inspirational as you seemed to do this over a short period - how long did it take?

The original desultory decluttering has been going on for years. You know the sort, you feel irritated by something so you chuck it, or you feel trapped so go round with a black bag only to put three things in it, or you go through your clothes and only get rid of the ones you absolutely hate or can't be worn anymore, or something is really getting in the way. Every other bit of clutter is under control or you just look at it and feel a big wave of inertia.  It took over the course of a three or four months I think, and it only took that long because there was a lockdown in November and I couldn't get rid of the books until it finished. I'm not saying I have finished decluttering, I haven't but I have changed the way I think about it so it's no longer a useful object in waiting or something that will be used last because I dsilike it for whatever reason, holes, stains, the colour, the shape, the uselessness of it, whatever. But I can say that all the drawers and cupboards close now and have room to spare.

I remember the feeling of I'm just overwhelmed and don't know where to start so I started small with my craft stash and got rid of about a third of it which brought it down to four big boxes and two bags and another couple of bits. Then I smashed up a two seater sofa I'd rescued because I did have vague ideas of recovering it but then it turned into something only the cat slept on and it wouldn't fit in my car for me to take it to the tip,so I got the sledghammer and started hitting it. And standing on it and bouncing on it until I got it in enough parts to fit in the boot. Coincedentally, this make recycling it easier because now it was wood, material and metal bits which all went in their respective recycle bins. And then there was no stopping me and after my OH had seen me be prepared to chuck things away, he got on board too. At one point, he was telling me to keep my own stuff that I was chucking out.

I only worked my way up to chucking whole swathes of items after I read a slob comes clean book because then I stopped thinking about selling stuff and just got rid of it. And I kept rereading that book untilI felt I was done for the now and used it as inspiration.

BTW, chucking out and getting rid of means I recycled as much as I could within a short timeframe, so material etc when to clothes bank or the charity shop, wood, metal, small electricals etc went into recycle bins at the tip, books to a reselling place. But it also means chucking out if that was the only way to do it.

BarbCh

@-taff.... Great post.
I''m sure that your view on things is going to be very helpful to a lot of people.

balabooberlies

3secondmemory said:

My home is a reflection of my state of mind! At the moment it’s terrible. I have polar swings of hyperactivity and executive dysfunction when I’m in normal physical health thanks to ADHD. I’ve been physically ill for the last 11 months which hasn’t helped. I just don’t know where to start.

Ditto 3SM

Has the world ended because you had days where you did nothing ?  No !

Just enjoy and take advantage of when you get the 'spurts'.

I did half the kitchen and half the bathroom yesterday.  It will be finished today.  Fingers crossed.

Start by liking yourself.  You are unique.  Probably lovely, kind, caring, etc.........

Really hope you recover your health as quickly as possible.

bala

x

BarbCh

Good morning all you lovely ladies (not sure if any gents participate in this thread).

It's wonderful to read all of your posts and each one of us has something of value to share.

Value seems to be a word used in recent posts.... of how and what we attach value to....and as the coffee picture suggests.... each moment of the day has its value! 

And so has all of the 'stuff emotional and physical, that we have accumulated over time.
And when no longer of value, we are coming to terms with letting it go.... and although it has served it purpose of value to us..... it can, like, @-taff smashed up sofa...reveal something else that has value as it gets discarded to the recycling skip! 
(I now have visions of Sarah Beanie sifting  through it and upcycling all the broken components).

I always remember my grandparents saying 'one man's junk...... is another man's treasure

And -taff went away feeling satisfied on several levels.... personal, ethical and environmental.
Keep these posts coming ladies.... you are all making fabulous contributions to this thread 

balabooberlies

As for pens etc

A lovely lady (there are so many) on another thread mentioned a charity that I researched.  'Pens for kids, UK'

Well worth taking a look....

bala

x