First Steps to Solvency

Sun_Addict

Happy Birthday, hope you manage to have a decent day. Glad you got your FA. You'll get sorted, it needs to be done in baby steps, not going to happen overnight.

RelievedSheff

alt80 said:

Knowing I can finish my block without affecting other parts of my life massive present there tbh. Pressure off a bit. 

Thanks for the birthday wishes lol @RelievedSheff really shouldn’t have mentioned mine was the day after your dog’s birthday haha.

Three page letter off FIL fml. Not gonna lie I want to spend like a madman this morning wife on school run and I’ve logged onto the debt site rather than JL haha don’t know what the !!!!!! is happening to me. Sorting my life out who knows.

You just like our company really

getmore4less

Happy B'day
had mine during lockdown a bit different this year, with our travel friends we are all ignoring this years and double downing next year.


Good news on the FA now you can plan that out to the end,  start thinking if it will be sell on or become letting,  as it is flats what about a mix where you sell some keep some and keep the management of the block?

ON the work front and the week "off"  , if you need to do some try to let the team manage the day to day sn focus on more strategic stuff maybe try to network a bit with the mentors to start bouncing ideas.

looking at the downer,
One problem I have my monsters play with my head i wonder if yours are, they know you need validation, when you don't have it you can go spending, subconsciously and even consciously they can set you on a path that triggers the monster.

This time the monster was thinking you are getting  bit too comfy with the family and got you talking about moving and gearing of the res, you know you can't do this for some time and  know the wife is not into this atm and you know she will tell the FIL and it set off the "they think I can't do it" and that trigger the spend monster.

There is  probably other stuff as well and it can be hard to spot the chain of events starting,  for now I think you need to back off the 5 year plan and focus on the good stuff about the 2 year plan that will have you debt free with a stronger income base that can support the 5year plan in your head(where it needs to stay when dealing with family) .

This FA  unblocks that project so maybe talk about that a bit and maybe that knocks onto the other project of the hall that wife has shown an interest in, then you have the instructions in the main business are good, how do you build/capitalize on that.


On the present front its going to be hard, previous years have been about throwing money at it, this year needs some thought(I am rubbish at it) 
 I wonder if something that says thank you for her efforts to rain in the spending but careful not something that says she is dropping the ball on the looks. 


Looking ahead(I would only do this in my head for now, and only if you think the wife would go for it)  your son seems to like the Greece connection could you get the business into state where it will tick along for a few weeks and look at an extended trip to Greece over the summer school holidays.

 

enthusiasticsaver

alt80 said:

Doesn’t help wife involving them tbh yesterday she told me she was going if I didn’t speak to her dad. Meant it too.

Ha feel for you on the in-laws front doesn’t sound too different to mine they call my wife and their other kids at a moments notice expecting them all turning up to bbqs / dinner at theirs. All their kids and in-laws go house isn’t massive so more in summer time. Avoid it as much as possible they’re all a bit lefty socialist teacher types conversation kills me. They’ve no interest in property, cars or spending lol.

Tbh can’t even buy anything easily cards under wife’s lock and key until end of week, deleted off Apple etc for the time being.

My MIL is dead now so obviously not an issue.  To be fair she was a very kind lady but just a bit thoughtless as she didn't work and got up at like 6am so thought it would be ok.  I didn't mind it occasionally but not every Sunday so we came to an arrangement.  I asked her to talk to me in the future though rather than sending me a letter.  She did the same with her other DIL over something or other and they did't talk or visit for more than a year. 

I will also gloss over the lefty socialist teacher comment as I might have more in common with them than you as not really interested in spending, property or cars  either.   Sounds like a bit of give and take on both sides might be called for there. We don't talk politics (or Brexit) with my family  as my mum and stepdad and brother are DM right wingers (not extreme thankfully) and we are definite left of them.  Not socialist though. Can talk about local events, current  affairs and family, holidays etc without coming to blows. 

 Good you cannot spend at least for today and I think most of what you bought you can return?  Apart from the C which shall not be mentioned.  Not tried it myself but sounds like you are skating on thin ice to go down that road. Is that what has pushed your wife to  the limits? Can you have a nice civilised day with your wife today talking calmly given it is your birthday or will she not discuss it without her Dad? Sounds strange given you are both adults. 

New budget day next week isn't it?  Just stay on track for one more week. It will get easier. 

Four_Seasons

Happy Birthday!! I have been following your diary and even though you don't think so you are doing so well, sure there are ups and downs but everyone has those.  Keep going we are all cheering you on!!

SuperSavingD

Just wanted to wish you a Happy Birthday.  I’m another reader of your diary who sits in the background wishing you well.  I must admit some days I read and smile and other days I want to throttle you (not literally) for your comments but love seeing you make progress the most.  Hope you have a great day.

Tropically

Happy Birthday!!

maddiemay

Another one who has been reading and wishing you well, I hope that your birthday is better than you anticipated. I really disliked those birthdays that ended with a "0", shame really as I have passed quite a few of them now - same age as your mum I think I read. Great news about the FA, as others have said really try and get into this project if you can and take the pressure off yourself with some of the other stuff.  
MM

SallyDucati

Happy Birthday!!  
I think overall your mindset has changed since you started this diary - something to be proud of.  A few blips along the way are normal, you're recognising them and dealing with them rather than ignoring.  Well done & keep going!  

dawnybabes

Happy birthday 

could you get your wife involved in the project somehow ? Maybe helping with the selection of stuff ?